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Puff the wonderful

Human rules - Part 2

March 16th 2010 3:37 am
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Humans are very big on insisting that we learn certain “rules” such as:

The vet is your friend - Yes, I actually had one of my humans say this to me. As all of you know friendship in our world is actually done with a cold nose in the butt sniff. There is nothing else like it to show interest, check out the health of the other and of course see what yummy stuff you have been eating. If the vet is a “friend” why are they not sniffing my butt and offering me their butt to sniff too? The vet will poke, prod and invade orifices but never have I had one actually stick their nose right in my behind for a good long sniff so please do not tell me this person is my “friend”.

Cats are members of the family too – All I can say is that cats, like dogs, have different personalities and each one has to be handled differently. The most important rule regarding cats is do not and I must repeat here, DO NOT hurt the kitty no matter what. Should you be foolish enough to get close to the kitty and it swats you across the nose immediately drop on the ground and roll around so it looks like you are enjoying your moment of sibling bonding. If the humans happen to see this interaction the kitty will be branded as a “Bad” kitty and you will be hailed as the “Good” doggy as they doctor the bleeding gash on your nose. The whole trick here is to do this little game ONLY when the humans are close by so that the kitty continues to get in trouble. At no time are you to look like you want to kill, maim or eat the kitty. You must always look like the injured and innocent party who did nothing to induce such rude behavior from the kitty. I personally like to give my kitty brother some doggy kisses only when I know the humans are watching as it upsets my kitty brother and it makes me look good – BOL.

Riding in cars - There are different types of car riding, some dogs ride in the back of open trucks so the air can blow through their hair, others stick their heads out open windows for the same effect. Some dogs have doggy car seat while others are allowed to sit on the car seats of their choice. My human tried to make me ride in a crate when I was in the car but I cried and cried and now I am allowed to sit on the passenger seat up front. Of course I am wearing a harness and have the seat belt holding me securely in place but that’s okay because at least I am safe and if you ever had to ride with my momma you too would want a seat belt on, a St. Francis medallion on your collar and the rumored luck of the Irish on your side – BOL

Little humans are pack members also – I’d like to know just what pack these little humans are from. Puppies can leave home when they are 8 weeks old; little humans 18 YEARS or more!!!! Puppies are bi-lingual by the time they are 6 months old; little humans can’t do much more than poop and cry at this age. Although it sounds like little humans are a royal pain let me point out that they do have some very redeeming qualities. They will freely share their food with you and if they don’t, it’s super easy to take their yummy treats away and enjoy them for yourself. Initially little humans are no fun but as they get older you will have many adventures to go on with them so please be patient and watch out for them because they will be an asset later in your life.


Barked by: THE BOYZZZ (Dogster Member)

March 16th 2010 at 6:14 am

Puff you surpassed yourself this is toooo hilarious specially the first and the last!!!!!

Barked by: Stella Marie (Dogster Member)

March 16th 2010 at 9:20 am

I enjoyed reading this diary entry. It was very well written and you made excellent points! Great observation Puff! :) Yes! How can the vet be our supposed 'friend' if he doesn't take the time to sniff my bum, nor allow me to sniff his bum?


I wonder what my reaction would be to a house kitty. I'd prolly run away scared. Aroooo!
Barked by: Little CoCo Puff (Dogster Member)

March 16th 2010 at 7:58 pm

Puff, I wuv your attitude - matches mine completely. Good job on the diary!!!




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