May 23rd 2013 1:53 am
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good morning sweet girl! here i sit, needing to get ready for work & tears are pouring from my eyes.. i don't know what happened, i just lost it.. i am missing you so darn much i just don't know what to do..
your lil sister rascal is here & she always licks my tears away..but right now i think she senses i need to just cry.. more like sobbing..
i just can't stop this hurt.. this pain inside me is unbearable.
i'm sorry droopy, i'm trying, i really am..i guess this is just one of my bad days..real bad day.. i better get ready for work.. wish i could just crawl back into bed & just stay there.. at least then i could shut my eyes & imagine us together again...don't worry bout mommie, i'll be o.k. you have a good day with all your angel friends & run & play..I miss you Droopy.. i miss your sweet face, your beautiful smile, your beautiful brown eyes, your smell, the touch of your fur, your bark, i miss ALL of you! I love you droopy! I just love you so much & will always love you!
May 12th 2013 8:19 pm
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hi droopy, my beautiful girl.. i just wanted to tell you how much i love you & how very much i miss you! i so wish you were with me.
i still cannot accept what happened to you & that you are gone..i just can't. i hurt so much inside..i just want to hold you again. i need to hold you. oh droopy, i just don't know what to do. i just feel so lost & empty. i feel like the only thing i have left inside me is pain..
i just feel lost.. i love you droopy! my beautiful brown-eyed girl!
i'm going to bed now..i'm just worn out. i'll write more tomorrow..
i hope i see you in my dreams... i love you so much droopy!
April 22nd 2013 7:05 am
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hi droopy, its mommie..i know i didn't have to tell you that.. i put some new pics of you on your page. look at you! you were & still are beautiful! I remember your very first birthday so clearly droopy. you were so excited! i made you a cake & put a candle on it & sang to you!
you weren't crazy about the hat, but once you got your treat you forgot all about havin it on, lol. everybody thought i was crazy, making you a cake & stuff, oh well.. i made you a cake every birthday you had! we always had a great time, me & you, didn't we!
I miss us droopy. i miss being with you so much. it hurts so very bad.
the pain inside me keeps growing everyday, it doesn't stop. I know it never will. I have so many beautiful memories & i cherish each one.
They are beautiful memories of a best friend, a bond so deep & they are so precious to me, yet they bring so much pain when i realize i can't hold you. When i sit in front of your memorial & especially look at the picture on your urn its like, its like that picture comes alive & i feel you beside me. i know that probally sounds crazy, but its so real. i feel like you are there, looking at me for real through that picture. i can't explain it. everyday i cry.. i know you are happy, running & playing with all your beautiful angel friends...i'm happy you are not in pain, not suffering anymore, but i can't help being torn apart inside, droopy. i know you would not want me to sit here & cry. If you were here you'd get your ball & i know just what you would do, you'd stand in front of me & squeak that darn thing until i finally got up & started playing with you.. If that didn't work you'd toss it on my lap & stand there giving me that look you had & you'd bark at me until you had me laughing.. next thing i know we'd be playing & wrestling together, lol.. you were one of a kind droopy.
MY one of a kind & i miss you more than any words describe!
Yes, i cry alot, but i also find smiles through my tears. I close my eyes & see you running & playing with that big smile you had & those beautiful eyes so full of love. I love you so much droopy! i know one day i will get to hold you again & when i do, i will never let go of you. Its because of the love you filled my heart with i go on, its because of that love you gave me that i try to help others who feel this pain. Its because of your love i'm a better person, not perfect, but better.. I hope you know how very much i love you droopy & how deeply i miss you. i'll talk to you later sweetheart. you go run & play.. look in on me from time to time, o.k. scootercrunch.
love you forever droopy, mommie
April 20th 2013 12:03 pm
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Hi all my dear pals & all dogster! its me, da droopster! i just wanted to let you all know dat i was thinking bout you all! mommie got some new pics of me on my page! well, them not new, but first time mommie posted them! i hopes you likes them! mommie been very sad lately.. her just really misses me so muches.. i really wish i could makes her smiles.. sometimes i does, but her cry awhole lots.. but i am always right beside her & mommie says her can sometimes feel me...
well, i has to head back now.. but i be back to visit soon! i'm sending lots of kisses & hugs to ALL my friends! i also wants you to knows dat i so happy to gets so many presents on my page! thank you all! you is da best pals in da world! you all be safe & gives you mommies & daddies lots of hugs & kisses! you never get too many hugs & kisses! i be back to bark more soon! I LOVES YOU PALS & dogster!
your furever angel friend, droopy
April 10th 2013 6:56 pm
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This happened sunday, it's taken me till now to post it in Droopy's diary cause everytime i tryed i just completely started sobbing. I know this was a beautiful & wonderful thing, but my heart still carries so much pain. We were up my sister's(aunt lisa's). Rascal and Layla(my sister's dog) were goofin round in the yard. me & my sister were just hangin out, havin a beer & talkin.. all of a sudden i said, lisa, there's a butterfly!!! anyone who's from around here knows you do not see butterflies this time of the year. especially with as cold has its been. this butterfly was beautiful! it keep flying right at me, i mean right up to my face, almost touching me! then it swooped down at layla like it was playing with her!!!! it did the same thing to rascal! it flew at lisa & then back at me.. it would not stay away from me! i have never seen a butterfly act like this! I started crying and my sister said lori, thats a sign, thats our droopy! this butterfly just kept flying at me & one time it just fluttered right in front of my face, like droopy was telling me, see mommie, i'm happy! i was ballin my eyes out!
i felt this sense of calmness... i like got this warm feeling all through me..
this butterfly was just fluttering around us like it was playing with us!
layla & droopy were very close & this butterfly kept "teasing" her, it was so cute, although layla jumped at it & tryed to catch it, lol.. thats how the two of them played! and it fluttered by rascal too & she tryed to chase it.. me & my sister were just standing there, watching this butterfly play with two pups! it was unreal! other people can say & think what they want, but i know, I KNOW that was my droopy sending me a sign.. i also believe that was droopy telling me that her & dino were together & they both are happy & she wanted me to know that! this lasted i know a good 20 minutes.. this butterfly came from nowhere & fast has it came, all of a sudden it just vanished! i mean vanished! it was like it didn't fly away, it just dissapeared!
i was laying in bed that night & i started crying & i thought of that beautiful butterfly & this sense of peace came over me.. it was just an amazing thing to see.. i will never forget that & it will always be a very special memory i will hold forever in my heart! you all know how much i miss my droopy & just can't seem to find any comfort from this pain that eats me away everyday. I know my heart will never heal completely, its not possible, but maybe i will finally start to allow myself to be happy, believing in what that butterfly came to tell me.. droopy is happy, still loving me, watching over me & waiting for me..
the friendship, laughter, happiness, support & love that i found here with all of you dear friends at Dogster means everything to me. we are a family here. we share our good times, our bad times. we share our happy times & sad times. I thank you all for everything you've given me & mostly for keeping my Droopy a part of your hearts. I'm so thankful to have you all to share my feelings with & i hope that i return that love to you all.
I will never stop missing my Droopy, this pain will never leave my heart. But i do feel a sense of "calmness" in my heart after seeing that beautiful butterfly. if only for a few minutes, i know i was together again with my droopy & i know she was sending me a message,
she's o.k. & she loves me! Tears are pouring from my eyes now.
Droopy, you will FOREVER live inside my heart & memories. i didn't think it was possible but i miss you & love you more each day that passes! you will always be my beautiful brown-eyed girl!
every minute of everyday i'm holding you in my heart.
thank you for coming to see me Droopy, you put a smile in my shattered heart. I LOVE YOU SCOOTERCRUNCH! forever, mommie
March 31st 2013 7:44 pm
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well my sweet girl, another holiday has come & gone.. our second easter apart. it does not get easier..i completely fell apart today, missing you so very much droopy. everyday is bad, holidays & special days are just worse. sometimes i wish i could just stay in bed, not even deal with the day.. but..somehow i manage to get up & do what i need to do,although most of the time i feel like i'm in a daze..i just really miss you droopy. my heart hurts so much.
i hope you had a beautiful day at the bridge with all your angel friends. i bet you had a big feast today! you should see all the beautiful easter eggs all your pals sent you on your page! you sure have beautiful friends! they all love you so much droopy & they miss you just like i do! i want to say THANK YOU, to all droopy's friends for thinking of her today & everyday! you have no idea how much that means to me! thank you, each & everyone of you!
you have some very special friends droopy, very special!!!
well scootercrunch, mommies head hurts from crying, i can hardly see anymore & i'm just worn out.. i guess i'll say goodnight now honey.
i'll hold in my heart forever droopy & pray when i close my eyes, we can be together in my dreams..you will always be my beautiful brown-eyed girl & the most loving friend i ever had! there is nothing that will ever break the special bond we share..oh, tomorrow is rainbow bridge day. i think i'm going to sit down & write you a poem..a very special poem.. oh droopy, i sit here & look at your pictures & i just can't come to terms with you not being here. i still find myself screaming your name, being so very angry you were taken from me the way you were. i'm trying droopy, i am.. i know you hated to see me upset.. i'm trying....but you gave me a love, real love, something i never believed in, until you opened my heart & filled it with your love.. its really hard to lose that...i have love with rascal, but there was something very special about you..you saved my life, you broke all the walls i had around my heart, you filled my life with laughter & happiness..you made me see how i was falling apart & helped me find the courage to ask for help, you saved me droopy..
i wish i could of saved you scootercrunch.. i'm so sorry, so very, very sorry... i know you love me droopy & i pray you still feel my love for you.. i'll keep trying to smile, through my tears. i just want to make you proud of me droopy. i know i was & always will be VERY proud of you. I LOVE YOU DROOPY, always! sleep well my sweet girl
i'll see you in my dreams...happy easter droopy
mommie LOVES YOU & MISSES YOU, VERY MUCH! goodnight sweetheart...
i'll see you again droopy...
March 27th 2013 3:26 am
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i miss you so much droopy. i was just sitting here one night, looking at all your pictures i have on your memorial, thinking how each one has a story, a memory. i looked at each one & i could remember what we were doing that day.. i remember the fun we had, how you made me laugh.
i could see your big smile, your eyes so full of excitement & wonder,
so full of life. looking at your pictures brings me many smiles, many memories and yes, many tears. i was thinking of how i had big plans for this year. you know how birthdays mean alot to mommie. well mommie is gonna be the big 50 this year & you would of been 10. to me, they both are very special birthdays.. i guess some might say i'm naive, i really thought me & you would grow old together. i sure never imagined i would lose you so sudden, without any warning. your beautiful face was getting grey & i thought you looked adorable! i didn't worry about it, you were still so full of energy, so full of life!
and every picture i have a you shows that life, that look of wonder & excitement you always had in your eyes. every picture tells a beautiful story & i am honored to be a part of each one. i was always so proud of you, my gentle giant. you had a sweetness in you that showed in everything you did. i saw nothing but love in your eyes. i always felt so blessed to be the one you shared that love with.
i miss you droopy, i miss you more each day that passes. i will never get over what happened. i will hold you in my heart until that day comes when i can hold you in my arms & then i will never let you go.
i love you scootercrunch! always & forever! mommie
March 20th 2013 3:13 am
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hey scootercrunch, its mommie, but you know that..i've been trying for days to find the way to put in words how i been feeling lately. i just can't seem to do it.. so for now i just want to tell you how much i miss you! not one day goes by i don't think of you. i kiss you good morning & goodnight everyday. i hope that somehow you feel those kisses. i just wish i could hold you, see you, feel you, just one more time. i love you so much droopy! you are so special & you will always , ALWAYS be my girl. i have alot more to tell you droopy, hopefully i'll find the way to do that soon. for now i'll just say, i love you sweetheart. i miss you, more than any words can say, i miss you. in fact, miss you doesn't even begin to describe how i feel or the pain i feel inside. i love you droopy, always, i love you.
February 27th 2013 1:35 am
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good morning sweet girl, guess what! i got an e-mail telling me that you are one of dogster's diary picks today! i was so happy i started to cry. but you know it doesn't take much these days to make me cry.
i wish you were here to share your "special" honor. i remember before you were chosen & i danced with you, lol & kissed you all over! remember that droopy?? if you were here i'd bring you home the biggest jumbone i could find today! they were your favorite treat! i used to laugh you'd be so excited bout gettin one you'd get these bubbles on your mouth because you were drooling with excitment, lol! i miss you so much droopy. sometimes i still think i've got to be stuck in a horrible nightmare & i'm gonna wake up & everything will be like it was. but the nightmare just goes on & on..most days i still walk around numb, but i'm gettin alittle better droopy, slowly, a day at a time.. in my heart i know i owe you droopy to be happy again. you worked so hard to save me & show me how wonderful life could be. i don't want to let you down.. i also know you understand how i feel. you know how much i love you, how much we loved each other.
so in your honor my sweet girl, i will smile today. and i'll try not to feel guilty about it because i know you wil be smiling back at me.
all i want is to make you proud of me droopy. just like i was & still am so very proud of you! you enjoy your day today scootercrunch!
i bet you & all the angels will be celebrating all day! send me alittle kiss when you can today, o.k. droopy. i miss you honey!
never forget how much mommie loves you and will forever!
i'm holding you in my heart everyday droopy & i'll never let you go!
i love you, mommie
February 26th 2013 7:13 am
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hi pals! well mommie thought my dogster plus would automatically renew..it didn't :O( so i am temporary wifout it..but mommie gettin it back today! her was so upset when her saw dat..my page is very special to her. but mommie will get my page & da lil runt, er, i mean my lil sister's page, all fixed up again! hehehe i just loves to pick on my lil sister..i loves her so don't worry, just havin fun!
mommie helped find two pups last night dat got out of them yards!
mommie heard all this barkin & noise & then hear da lady yellin fur her pups! mommie ran out da door wif a flashlight & ask what happen? da lady said her two beagles got loose! mommie help her try & find them. mommie was scared, gotta worry bout cars, it was dark & if them was chasin a bunny..who knows where they could be! but them finally found them both & they got home all safe! my mommie was so happy & so was da beagles mommie! then mommie went back home & her cry.. her remember one time i got loose & how scared her was. and mommie started really missin me & her sat on da floor & talk to me & cry. then mommie kissed me goodnight & went to bed.. well, i guess dats all fur now.
i gotta sprinkle some angel kisses on mommie cause her crying..
i loves you pals! i miss you all so much but i always watching over you! thanks fur keepin mommie & RB in your prayers & me too!
you pals are very special to us & we loves each of you dearly!
hopes you all has a good day & if you by dat winter storm please b safe! bark more later! LOVES YOU ALL! da droopster
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