I'm gonna be a DOG SHOW CHAMPION!!!!

Mom was tellin me I needed to update my page to something more ~GREEN~ she said St. Patrick's day is just around the corner,but you see.... I kinda like my pimped out Luv page...yea yea I know Valentine's is over but I'm a sexy luv machine and my page is too.. so maybe I'll hold on to it for just a bit longer.

************* NEWS FLASH**********************
Our town is holding a Dog Show!!!! That's right mon ami a poochie poo doggie dog show!!! Starring no other than moi!!! Pedigree or no, I shall have all rights given to me by God to shake my little beeeehind down said runway!!! Mother always said I would be a star!!!! Alas sweet victory is mine and I shall roll in all it's glories!!
************************************************* *

#########THE BREAK DOWN MINUS THE DRAMA########
This info provided by Mom does not reflect the views of Pookie:

Our town is holding a local Dog Show for charity, to enter one must only provide a sack of dog food to support our local shelter...no pedigree required!! Beaureguard aka Pookie will be one of many dogs entered into said Show and has not won (as of yet) any title he may claim.

Computer Hog

Sorry about the absence here...my MOM is being a computer HOG!! Now, I know it's not nice to call mom names, but SHE is being totally unreasonable here! I never get a chance to catch-up with me pals or read my emails ...nothing!! Mom got all off in that genealogy crap and now I'm just an afterthought! I don't know where I came from either but ..HEY..you don't see me burning my eyeballs out staring at computer screen all hours of the night! She keeps mumble "1880 census.. no.. no maybe the name was spelt difffffferennnt" in her sleep at night, I wonder if this qualifies as child/dog neglect??? Oh no here she comes with her binder of "research" papers!!! Gotta run

Thank you.....I think???? ;)

After receiving 6 febreze collars....I am forced not only to say Thank You but to question..............Do I Offend?

Thanks guy!!

the "Dog Days" of summer

Mom says we are heading into the "Dog Days" of summer...although I'm not sure exactly what that means...I'm gonna take a wild guess and say it has to be good cause they call it "Dog Days." Maybe since it's the "Dog Days" that means that us pooches get to do whatever we want and our humans give us special treats?! That sounds right...I mean there's Mother's Day and Father's Day and Earth Day so Dog Day doesn't seem to far fetched. Woof! A day just for Me!! I have to start planning how I want my day to go.....hmmmmm....my first demand will be........

Incognito

Well schools out fur summer!!!!!Yeppers and the kiddo's are already starting with the I'm Bored stuff.....mom put work on hold fur the summer so now things are back to normal fur me!!! I get to chill out with mom all day!!!! Of course I haven't told all ya'll what mom did to me last week, and well....to tell ya the truth, it's almost too embarrassing. Mom got a feather up her butt and decided to buy herself one of those home grooming kits and well she blind-sided me with the thing and before I knew it I was sportin' a new do' .....I just assumed by the awwww's coming from Mom,I must have been cute! Well Dad came in later that day and said "Oh my dog !!! What did your momma do to you!!" well that right there made me plum nervous, then Dad held me up to the mirror and insulted me with the new title " Bat-Dog" complete with theme music. Needless to say the reviews have been mixed, Mom says I need a spike collar and a little leather....Dad says I need a wig. I just wish the next time mom gets one of those feathers up her butt, she tries it out on one of the human kids not ME!!!

Ps. My mother has been so kind as to post a photo from her cell phone

What's a Artsy Spring?

Well life seems SO busy now that Mom is working. My adventures have been limited to the tiled hallway thanks to the horrid BABY GATE!! Needless to say it's hard to get into trouble when you can't jump the gate....WHY why are my legs so darn short!! Mom says I'm over reacting and that I should be happy that I get to wait Inside,in the AC. Some dogs have to wait Outside in the heat and cold, thunderstorms and darkness. So maybe Mom is right ....it's not THAT bad...but I'm still not happy about it. I heard Mom talking to Dad the other day, something about a trip to Artesian Springs??? I don't know what a artsy spring is and where you have to go to jump on one....we have a trampoline, why don't they jump on that?She said they have a 100 ft slide too,well I don't know how long our slide is but we got one of those too?!Mom said they have fishing and paddle boating and nature walks,golf,all kinds of things, I'm not much of a golf guy myself (no thumbs ya know?!) but I could do the nature walk and maybe even a little boating....better get me a new life vest! Mom said that we should all go as soon as school lets out, wonder what that spring thing is all about?Will there be lots of pups there? Oh I can't wait to find out! Whoops!! Mom says it's time to go to Wal-Mart...darn back to the hall I go!
Laterz pup pals!!

Happy Mother's Day !!! I love you T-----H-----I------S - much!!!

I just wanted to take a break in my OH So Busy schedule to wish my Mom Happy Mother's Day!!! That's right I love my furless Mom T---------H-------I---------S much!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And hey while I'm passing out the love ....here's a big HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY to all the Momma's out there!!! Hope all you lovely ladies enjoy your SPECIAL day!!
Luv ya all
The Pookster

Love is in the Air.....dum dee dummmm OOOOh yes!!

singing:
Love is in the Air.....dum dee dummmm OOOOh yes!!

Hey there all my puppy pals! Mom has been hookin' me up at work! Yeppers, I met me a sweet lil' thang named .....Foxxy ohhh yeah ,that's right 2 X's cuz she Xtra hot!! I finally found me a girl just my size with a pedigree just as twisted as mine! LLLLLLLLove is IN the AAAAAIIIIIIRRRR ,I may not be a Sinatra... but I love to sing!!!! Hey maybe the next time my sweet thang comes in to get her nails and hair did Mom will take a pic fur me.....I'm on cloud 9.....dummm deeee dum de dummmmm
Laterz my poochie pals!!

The Captain has been captured.....Evil Alien Squirrels- control "MOTHER"

(Star Trek intro music)

“Outside, the final frontier. These are the voyages of the dogship Enterprise. Her life long mission: to explore strange new worlds, to seek out new life and new civilizations, to boldly go where no dog has gone before.”



(a dimly lit torture cell...referred to by the humanoids as a "Pet Taxi" the Captain sits at the rear of the cell ,filthy & sweaty)


Captain's log Star date 04272008
I have been unable to communicate with my crew for several weeks now. The human life form known as "MOTHER" has been under the mind control of the evil alien squirrels. Her current mission.....the Torture of all Dogs.
(the captains dirty face expresses anguish)
I have not been able to break through to "MOTHER" and she continues her barbaric ,inhumane treatment of dogs daily all the while I am forced to watch from my prison cell!
Each morning I am forced into my portable cell and loaded into the "speedy transport machine" also known as a Grand Caravan where I am transported to the place of TORTURE aka the groomers.
This is where "MOTHER" welcomes other humanoids with smiles ... all the while loading the poor innocent pups into individual cells where I listen to their cries.
This place....the smells......the sounds...
(The Captain begins to stare blankly off into space....just then the noise of the clippers jolts him back into reality)

Oh No, not another dip! Poor fella never saw it coming....at least this one didn't get the BOW treatment
(the smell of Giorgio fills the air)

I am under constant supervision....yet I must find a way to escape, I must warn the world of the evil alien squirrels plans.....until next time....Captain Out!

OMD!!! NOOOOOooooooo Not GORE!!!!!!

OMD!! Mom & I did that whole Which Celebrity Is Your Pet Quiz ? And can you believe that thing said I was a AL GORE...YUCKY yuck YUCK!!! I am WAY CUTER than Gore and plus he's such a doofus...of course he did win a Nobel which means I could probably get two of them...guess they pass um' out like candy these days BOL!! Oh well,Mom said she wouldn't hold it against me and no matter what these quizzes say...I'm still her Pookie Bear.