I'M NAKED

I'm naked!!!! I somehow got my bandana(red with white bones got it for Christmas) wrapped around my front leg so it looked like I had my leg in a sling. So when mom saw it, she took it off. She said she has to wash it anyway(something about me dragging it through the big puddle on the corner-also known as the Puddle of Life). But she didn't put a new bandana on me and I have plenty. So I got to walk around the neighborhood naked. We ran into Scooby and Shiloh and Harley so when we got home we had a little dog party in the yard. Mom gave us all bones and we all ran around and barked at each other. Then one of my dad's cammping buddies came by. I thought we were going camping. But we didn't. That was a huge disappointment to me. But mom said we could have pizza tonight, so I got over my disappointment.

HAPPY GROUNDDOG DAY

Happy grounddog day!!!Ok I know it is ground hog day, but when my mom was a little girl she thought it was grounddog day. She thought it was the day all dogs had their birthdays(like how all horses turn a year older on Jan.1). I don't know what she thought a grounddog was, did she think there were spacedogs? And she never connected all that weather hoopla with the groundhog seeing his shadow and a day that starts out Ground. But someone finally set her straight. She doesn't care she still thinks its the birthday for all dogs and we are going to have a dog party tonight when dad comes home from work. I don't know know if we are going for a walk because my paw is a little sore today, I landed on it funny when I jumped out of bed and I think the only thing that can cure it is left over Chinese food.

BUSY DAY

First, mom would like to know how I can manage not to go to the bathroom all day long, where she even has to yell at me to get me to go, but I can't hold it in for those 10 extra minutes in the morning before the alarm goes off. But I say, you got to go when you got to go.
Our walk today was fun. I was a little jealous because Dad always takes Freckles and not me so I made them put me on the leash to walk with them. Hey they are my humans not Freckles. So all the people we met on the walk today petted me and Freckles. Harley came too, but he was really only interested in the pocketful of bones my mom carries. I met a new dog a german shepherd called Wyatt. he seemed pretty interested in me and I was a little put off by him but I let him smell me. Then his owner came and pulled him away.
After our walk, mom had to go do an errand so I followed her out. She got in the car and left so I decided I would just sit on the porch and wait for her to come back. Dad did not even know I was outside. So after forever and ever mom finally came back-with Chinese Food. I knew it would be worth the wait. Of course she gave me some wonton because I waited out on the cold hard porch for her and she said I am way cuter than Freckles or Harley or Wyatt or any other dog in the neighborhood.

MOM AND DAD WERE GONE ALL DAY

Mom and dad did not go to work today, but they went somewhere. They were all dressed up and dad took his guitar. That ususually means they are going to church but they just were not coming back for like ever!!!Finally they came home. They said they had to sing at a funeral that was way up in the mountains and then they had to stay to eat. But did they bring me any food? NO!! I got stuck just eating plain old dog food. But mom and dad are both pretty wore out so I think I will let them join me in my early evening nap before bed.

SOMEONE ATE MY DEER HEAD

Well, I knew when mom and dad didn't take a walk yesterday my deer head would be gone, and I was right. It was not on the hill where I left it. Some other dog must have eaten it. Oh well, at least I FINALLY got a taste of it. When we went on our walk today, Scrappy-Do was chained to a brick, but that sure wasn't stopping him from roaming around the neighborhood. Since we don't know Scrappy we looked at him from a distance to see if he was ok. he looked fine. One of the teenagers had some pepper spray but my mom told him not to spray that dog because then the dog would have a reason to bite him. Instead we all just yelled and barked and Scrappy's human came out. He couldn't believe that Scrappy he was able to move freely with his leash tied around a brick. Scrappy is normally inside or in a fenced in backyard(that's why we don't know him)So I guess they won't try that method of restraint again. This dog is still a puppy too. He is going to be super strong.
After our walk, Harley hung out with me for a little bit, but he was just trying to get bones from mom. Of course mom gave in. She is going to give all my bones way. And it's not like there is a Wal-mart every 5 miles or something.(Oh wait a minute yes there is).

WEATHER

it is raining and snowing and I don't think mom and dad want to take me for a walk. But, I still have some of that deer head hidden and I have to figure out a way to get to the field. My friend Dave came over for a while and I made him pet me and pet me and pet me until mom told me to stop being so needy and behave myself. Well, I hope I get to go on my walk. My parents are such wienies when it comes to cold,nasty weather.

DEER HEAD

If you have been a faithful reader of my diary then you know that there is a deer head floating around my neighborhood. (Actually, mom says there are about 3 deer heads, but I'm a dog numbers don't really apply to me). Everytime I get my opportunity to eat the deer head mom or dad makes me walk on the leash. But Today I was being very good. I walked right beside mom the whole start of the walk. I didn't even try to go to Prok Chop's(It's Friday- Rosie don't cook on Friday so why bother going). So because I was so good mom didn't put me on leash when she went to get Freckles. And that is when I saw it. The deer head!!!! Well, at least the jaw and teeth of the deer head. It was just the right size for me to pick up and carry so I could get out of sight of mom and then I ate it. It was Delicious!!!! I don't think that mom knew, after all I couldn't see her so she probably couldn't see me right? Well, it's time for my before dinner nap. Mom better get cooking I'm starved!

MY PLANS ARE REALIZED FINALLY

I spent all day on the couch thinking of a way to go see Pork Chop. I knew I had to be clever, because mom is always foiling my plans. So when mom came home from work, I went outside. I just sort of hung outside in the bright sunshine smelling the smells until mom came out with my leash. But she did not have Freckles' leash and Freckles was key to my plan, so I refused to go out of the yard until mom got a leash for Freckles. When mom got the leash I took off, but instead of going up the hill and past Pork chops house first I went the other way so that we would pass Freckles' house first. And while mom was busy with Freckles I took off toPork Chop's house. I used Freckles as a diversion . I knew that mom would never be able to catch up with me if she had Freckles to deal with. And I was right. I made it to Pork Chop's and got to see Pork Chop and eat some of Rosie's cooking before mom made it down the hill. Of course then I was ready to go home but mom said Oh No. I had go on the entire walk even though my toes were cold. Mom siad they weren't cold when I was making my get-a-way or when I was eating Rosies food. Well, cold toes were worth it.

HOW I GOT OUT OF MY WALK

Ok, normally I love going for a walk, but today was just cold and wet and damp and I really did not want to go out at all. But, China was running up and down the street like crazy, she doesn't usually get out for toots, so I went out on the porch to bark at her and all the people chasing after her.(It looked like she playing a fun game.) Since I was outside mom was right behind me with leash in hand. She said we were going on our walk while it was still daylight. Well, I played along. I went across the street to the field like I normally do and mom walked up ahead to wait on me.As soon as I couldn't see mom anymore I headed on back home. But mom came around the corner telling me to come on, so I pretended I was lost and did what I was taught to do if I get lost, I just sat down and waited. Mom started laughing because she knew I was just pretending(I was right across the street from the house). Mom told me to come so I went over to her but there was this big muddy ditch that I would have to cross to go on the walk and I didn't want to get my feet all wet and muddy.(We won't bring up the fact that I was sitting in the wet muddy field). So mom showed me a place to walk that wasn't in the ditch and it was directly across from the driveway so I just walked up the driveway and went in the house where I plan to take a nap on the heater vent. China, by the way, made it home fine after her big run up and down the road.

MOM FOILS MY PLAN

When mom came home from work today she said it was just too too cold to go for a walk. But she let me out to (well you know). It didn't seem all that cold to me. Maybe 15 or so. I kept begging mom to take me for a walk. Finally I saw Matt walking Rusty and Jake so I took off with them. Mom called me back and knew I wasn't giving up. So mom got all bundled up and she got my leash just in case but she said I was on my own walking on the ice. That's when I put my plan into motion. Instead of walking down the road, I headed up the road. I was taking the walk backwards. Then, I took the inner circle. (I got to see some of my friends-Rusty2, Abbie, Blackie and Max), but I had a master plan. And that plan was to go to Pork Chop's house. So as soon as we got to the hill I started to run. I knew mom would never run down an icy hill after me. Then the gates to Stephens yard were open, so I could go through the side gate and cut through their yard and out the front gate and be right in front of Pork Chop's. So I did!!!Pork Chops lights were on and his door was open, but just as I started to knock at his door, mom comes up behind me and snaps the leash on. So I didn't get t0 visit Pork Chop and eat some of Rosie's good good food. I'm disappointed, but tomorrow is another day.