Good Boy!

So Mom comes home with a boatload of bags from some big box mart and she starts carrying stuff in towards the house. We go all guardsy guardsy bark bark because we first of all hear human, then realize it's our beloved Mom. She gets in with her first load and lets us outside for some fresh air and romp time. I romp. Lexie sidles out through the open back gate and does some exploring! What daring! What intrepid spirit! What a mistake.

Mom comes out for load number two and immediately notices she had left the gate open. I, of course, am still in the yard doin' the romp thing, but sister is no where in sight. Mom starts calling for her even before she gets through the gate. Luckily for her, Lexie comes a-strollin' back down the alley and sashays in the way she went out. Mom scolded her mildly, knowing it was her own fault, leaving the gate open and all, but she does remind Lexie that her wanderlust is what first brought her to the Humane Society all those years ago. I suppose we don't really know if she wandered or was dumped by her owners (Lexie is sensitive about the subject and demurs when asked about it), but in any case, none of us should wander. I'm glad my sister is okay. Just her being gone for one minute made me a little nervous. If she were gone, who's toys would I steal? Who's attention would I have to butt in on? Who's kibble could I try to take? Life would be dull without my sister.

Ahhh, Sweet Smells of Autumn

Autumn means Fall. I just learned that. I am expanding my vocabulary by leaps and bounds. I love leaps and bounds. I do them all the time.

Biggest kid made chocolate brownies last night. It was so hard to fall asleep with the sweet, sweet smell of chocolate brownies baking in the oven downstairs. Kid stays up way too late and Mom was frowny this morning because same kid didn't do her dishes last night. Mom has this chart on the wall by the fridge that says which of the four kids does dishes on which night. Some people have those machines that do their dishes for them, but my family does not have one of those. I'm kinda glad because I already HATE the machine that sucks junk up off the floors. I am thinking I might not want to be in the kitchen if we had a machine making loud noises in there every night. I would really miss the kitchen because that's mostly my favorite room of all.

So, falling asleep was hard, but even harder was watching Mom eat brownie after brownie this morning (naughty Mom) while drinking her tea. That just added insult to injury. Temptation, lack of sleep, distraction, jealousy and schnauzer abuse - about what it amounts to. Lexie told me to get over it. "We will never in a million years be allowed to sample chocolate. Best hope for droppings, crumbs, messy child eaters . . ." Mom is not, unfortunately, a messy eater. By the time the little messy eaters get home this afternoon, there will be no brownies left for them to make messes with at the rate Mom is going. Sigh.

Short Week

This week is shorter than all the others. There is a pattern around this house. Mom wakes up and we get to go outside and then we EAT. Then we get a walk around the block. There are four children who leave the house soon afterwards, making it very quiet around here. Mom picks stuff up all over the floors and furniture while they are gone and replaces large amounts of food that have magically disappeared. When they get home, all the stuff comes out again even more than in the morning and the food magically disappears again. Mom gets those wrinkly lines between her eyes. Then Lexie and I get dinner. Then the humans get a bigger dinner than we do. We sit nearby and look pitiful, but we don't get bits of their dinner unless the children are careless or they are being forced to eat something they find disagreeable. We find very, very little to be disagreeable, so we help out the children at meal times in any way we can. After meal time, things wind down slowly to bed time and, on a good day, we get our evening walk. Then it starts over again in the morning for as many days as I have toes (including that funny toe farther up my leg). After I have run out of toes, the kids stay home for two toes. Then we start over with all my toes again. It is always like this lately, except suddenly we are not counting that funny up high toe! I don't understand it, but I like it when the children stay home. More opportunities for falling food and many more things left on the floor for me to chew on. It is so much fun!

Lexie tells me the kids just have a "day off" from school. She says I should get used to a few of those every now and again, especially in the fall. What a great thing, this day off. I will head down to the kitchen and see what has fallen during human breakfast! Arrroooo!

Dewy Dog

Today is supposed to be rather warm, but this morning it was still cool and the grass was all wet with dew. I romped around in it and then ran inside and jumped up on Mom, the bed and my sister. No one liked this, except the bed didn't mind. Mom minded for the bed. I was told a stern OFF many times today. But to my credit, I did sit rather nicely while Mom attached my leash this morning, which was a very polite thing to do. See, Mom - I can learn!
I am also learning that I should not walk in front of Mom on stairs, out the door or on our walks. That part is hard. I just want to go everywhere as fast as I can!

No Bite!

Mom keeps saying this to me - No Bite! I don't think she gets the fact that I don't have opposable thumbs. How else do I get her attention? The kids can come up and yak or tug on her shirt, but when I yip I am ignored (mostly - because I do it so often) and when I grab her shirt or pants (or arm or leg) I am told, "No Bite!" Not fair!
Lexie took me aside and showed me how to lay a gentle paw on Mom's thigh while she is sitting down. Mom seems to like that much better. I just get too excited. Tonight I said hi to Mom and tried the soft paws on her thigh, and guess what? She stopped what she was doing and reached down to pet me! And then guess what? I didn't bite her! She kept petting my head and scratching my ears and it felt soooo good. Then she stopped and went back to what she had been doing. That's when I bit her. Not hard, but I really, really wanted more! (It was really only a 'mouthing' not a bite - I would have really been in trouble for an actual bite!)
Mom said, "No Bite!" and "Off!" and my petting time was over. Lexie gave me the I-told-you-so look. If only I could control myself!

Oma and Packers and Chipmunks, oh boy!

Lexie and I went to Oma and Opa's today and watched some guys play football on the screen. Everyone was happy because the Packers won. They all jumped up and down on the screen like they had just gotten a whole bag of Charlie Bear treats or somethin'. I jumped up and down, too. Then Oma took Mom aside and showed her the spool of darning thread that she had found all mangled up from when I visited last night. Oops. Oma was worried because she had a darning needle stuck into it and I could have seriously hurt myself. Mom told Oma that she would watch me more carefully, and that anything within my reach was sort of in danger of mangling. I think that means I have permission to mangle, don't you?
Lexie and I went outside with Mom and there was this chipmunk and Lexie got to go off her leash and chase it, but I didn't. I was jealous, but we both got to sit at the entrance to his hole and sniff and stare and stand guard in case he came back out (no chance). Then we went for our Sunday afternoon walk with Oma and Opa, Mom and Dad, one of our kids and Mom's brother. Mom's brother likes to walk me sometimes so we sniffed and peed everywhere (Lexie and I, not my uncle). Mom and Uncle made us stop at street crossings and sit. We got a treat each time. Lexie is much better at it than I am, but I do love the treats.
To top off an already good day, Mom talked to Velvet about how to make dehyrated liver treats at home. Guess what that means???!!! I can't wait for my very own homemade liver treat!
What a fantastic day!

Exercise?

Lexie is laughing her head off at me! She just told me that all this time since I moved in, when I thought Mom was saying I needed to be exercised . . . she was saying I needed to be exorcised! Lexie told me that's why Mom bought me that Halloween costume yesterday.

I then had to remind her about her costume and what that might signify. She threatened to cast a spell on me.

Speak of the devil . . .

Mom bought Lexie and I Halloween costumes today! Lexie is a witch (no, not really, but she has this cool black jacket and matching hat with purple satin trim) and I am a devil. Mom says I know how to play the part. I don't know to witch part she is referring, after all Lexie is the which (or do I have that backwards?), but I do love to play, so I guess I can "play the part." I got a red outfit with a hood that has black horns on it and a long, red pointed tail that hangs down near my own docked stub. I look very nice in red, seeing as it contrasts with my salt and pepper coat, but I have to say I don't like the hood. My long delicate ears prefer to be flapping in the wind. Lexie's ears are cropped, but she doesn't like her witch hat hoodie, either. I don't think we were meant to put stuff over our ears. Mom says she can put some extra large buttonholes into the tops of our hoods so our ears can poke through, and this would keep the hoods up, but I think it might just bring out the devil in me.

Outta Control!

Mom says I am outta control. I run in front of her all the time and sometimes almost trip her up. I run up and down the stairs before her, often turning around mid-way up or down to say hello or grab at something she's carrying . . . in general, just getting in the way. I walk into things and people all the time. When on our double leash, I bounce into my sister and even bowl her over from time to time. She seems to be getting used to it, but Mom says it just isn't polite. She also says it's not polite to go for her ankles while she's carrying a full laundry basket up two flights of stairs, either.
Today Mom compared me to the teenaged boy in our house. She said I should be aware of others and give them the space they need. She said I shouldn't tease my sister and try to eat everyone else's food. She said I should learn to follow my humans, not try to herd them, lead them, or trip them. She said it's not about me. I really truly did think it WAS about me. I'll have to give that novel idea some thought.

Update

We had a fun play date today with our beagle buddies. The only problem was the bunny. Our bunny, Rex. Remember me eating all those yummy nuggets recently, getting an infection in my mouth and having to have medicine-stuffed treats every day for two weeks? Yeah, that bunny. One of the beagles, the younger one, didn't notice the bunny hutch, but the older beagle went right over and begged to have at the little furball. Now, Rex doesn't seem to care who's coming around the hutch, crawling under it, eating his poop, but this little beagle wouldn't give up. She wanted that bunny like any good beagle would. She ended having to stay on her leash the whole time because she just couldn't understand why she was being denied her genetic bunny-chasing propensities. Her mom and my mom agreed that next time we would meet at the beagles' abode down the alley. I'm so glad, because I really had a good time and I want to play with them again!

About Mom - she returned from the groomer looking like Mom, not like Jamie Lee Curtis, though she did have much less fur on top. Mom said she was happy with her new furdo, but she didn't have to tip her groomer so huge because she still weighs at least one jumbo dog-food bag more than Jamie Lee Curtis. Maybe two. I told Mom that if she wanted to get rid of one or two jumbo-sized bags of dog food, she knew I would be right there for her. I love my Mom and would surely help.