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Running Away From Home

March 28, 2007

March 28th 2007 6:38 am
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Dear Diary,

Well, I am in the proverbial dog house today. Mommy is angry because I ran away and "got lost." I was NOT lost, I knew exactly where I was and what I was doing. I saw that deer and I had to chase it! I had to catch it! I ran from the beach, across the road and chased the deer. It ran into the woods and I followed. Suddenly, I realized that the woods was sticky and wet so I turned around. Stupid deer. I didn't want to catch it anyway. Whatever.

I sniffed around and found a bunch of lobster pots. I sniffed all the lobster pots, but no lobsters. There was a rabbit in the lobster yard. I wanted to chase it, but it was in a cage. Stupid rabbit. It didn't run, all it did was bounce in its cage.

With nothing to chase, I decided to sniff for something to eat. I came to a fence and smelled something in the yard beyond. I found a way through the fence and there it was! A huge, stinky dumpster! I sniffed out some edibles and had a tasty snack. Then I continued back to the road.

I was almost to the road when I noticed Diggy and Mommy looking for me. I didn't want to go home yet, I was having so much fun. I quickly ducked behind a shrubbery and flattened myself out like a fieldmouse going through a stone wall. They didn't see me, but I watched them. They were talking to a surfer. The surfer pet Diggy. He gave him a snack! I wanted a snack! Oooh! I almost ran out to get a snack from the surfer, but instead I turned around and went back toward the woods.

I sniffed along the woods until I found a big bank of rotting snow. I lept up onto the snow and over the wettest part of the woods. I followed a sandy trail and came to a road. I ran up that road, sniffing all the houses and trees and wow! It was garbage day! I found a few edibles in some of the buckets, but most of them had already been emptied by the garbage team.

Since the garbage buckets were a bust, I went back to skulking through yards. I came upon two pitbulls. They tried to look menacing, but they weren't. I could bite their necks! We barked at each other for a while and then I continued on along their fence. Stupid pitbulls.

When I got to the end of the fence I found myself on a dirt road. I followed it up the hill and sniffed for rodents. I chased a squirell for a bit, but then I got tired and thirsty. I wanted to go home.

I headed back to the place where I left Mommy and Diggy. They weren't there. Why didn't they wait for me? Oh well, I knew the way home. I ran the whole way. When I got home, Diggy was inside the house. Mommy wasn't there. I had to sit outside on the deck to wait because Diggy couldn't open the door. He just barked at me. The neighbor dogs barked at me too. All the dogs were so upset. Mommy came home and when she saw me she started to cry.

I don't like it when Mommy cries so I gave her kisses and snuggs. But, I was so thirsty I just wanted to go inside and sip some cool water. We finally went in. Diggy growled a 'where have you been' at me. 'Having an adventure!' I reported back to him. He left me alone as I sipped my fresh water. Something that I had snacked on gave me a terrible taste in my mouth and the water made it better. I crawled into my bed, yawned and settled down for a nap.

I was rudely awakened by Daddy who picked me up and shook me! How rude! "Where did you go?" He asked. Like he doesn't know. Whatever. I had a good adventure. I wasn't lost at all. I don't understand why everyone makes such a fuss.


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