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I smell so nice

October 5th 2016 7:49 am
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Ah ma used to scold me whenever she finds me in her drawer. Not anymore. Today I asked to be fed in her drawer and she didn't even say a word. Ah ma loves me and I love ah ma.

Ah bee told me she saw a poodle strapped to a cyclist's back in a harness yesterday. She said it looked awkward. Coz it's back to back and because the cyclist is kind of bent over her racing bike, the doggie's back is extended the other way. A basket on the bike like the one the pretty shih tzu from the other condo has would be a better idea.

I haven't seen cha in a few days and her water cup is half full of water. I hope the nea doesn't show up for a mozzie spot check.

 

Hair day

October 4th 2016 5:09 am
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Fomfomfom got a haircut and then she came back and gave me one. We're both ugly now.

Ah ma said I'm very clever when I jumped out of her drawer. Coz that day I scratched my belly when getting out of that drawer. So today I thought about it and I jumped and ah ma was so pleased.

I read in the papers about Ireland's puppy mills. That's real bad karma.

 

Starve a fever feed a cold

October 3rd 2016 9:17 am
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Has apparently been scientifically proven. Whether or not you should eat when you are sick depends on whether it's a viral or a bacterial infection. I guess that means colds are viral and fevers are bacterial. Or something.

I just love it when old wives tales are proven. Old women are very wise you know. That's why I always listen to my ah ma.

 

Pork chop supper

October 2nd 2016 6:05 am
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Today is pork chop day. I got 2 pieces. They were nice and tender coz fomfomfom stood like a hawk watching over ah ma's shoulder and didn't let ah ma over cook them, as ah ma is so wont to do.

The pork chops made everyone thirsty. And now I have a mite under my right armpit and ah bee is trying to trap me.

 

Silly corgi

October 1st 2016 9:48 am
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Today we met a corgi puppy. He's got such short legs, even shorter than mine. Fomfomfom was carrying me and he wanted to say hello so she started lowering me to his level. His face was in mine so I barked at him. That's when he ran away and he didn't dare approach anymore after that.

Gotta let them know who's boss around here.

 

No luck

September 30th 2016 4:37 am
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Ah ma went adventuring in the casino this morning and soon we received word there was to be no dinner coz the struggle was immense. We were to cook rice and eat last night's leftovers.

Then I sat at the back gate and saw ah ma come back at 5pm. She was disappointed that I was barking at the doggie behind her and not welcoming her.

We're not bound by conventions. Conventions are boring.

 

Useless

September 29th 2016 8:33 pm
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The other day tutu started barking at the driver of a car parked outside our back gate. We didn't know what the fella had done to her to elicit all that madness. Later her mummy came over and explained that their cars are silver in colour and tutu had mistaken that parked car for one of theirs.

Oh goodness. I think maybe her daddy should just sell his maserati since his precious tutu can't tell it apart from a kia.

 

Gold

September 28th 2016 5:51 am
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It was a hot day. Fomfomfom stepped in poop. But she didn't realise it and wondered what that smell was that was everywhere. I dug in the huge pile of sand in the volleyball court. Fomfomfom and me, we were real happy. I got sand on my nose and in my moustache and everywhere.

We went home and I guess the house is a bit dirty. Maybe.

 

Homeopathy

September 27th 2016 11:20 am
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Is a form of natural medicine that's very popular with uppity German people. Something about how something that can make you feel sick can cure you as well. Like using poison to attack poison. Sounds like TCM to me. So anyway you use that substance and you dilute it in certan concentrations. And then you have to shake it in a very specific way. To a certain rhythm maybe.

Does that mean if I tell them the roo is making me ill they would give me more roo?

 

How could I stand it?

September 26th 2016 7:42 am
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Ah bee said I was a piss head after my evening walk. That means I'm a small dog, she tells me solemnly. But she wiped my head many times with a wet towel. Coz I might smell it and can't do anything about it and what would it be then? I'd surely be quite quite depressed.

I'm not a small dog now.

 
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