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December 10th 2016 6:17 am
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It is my 13th birthday today. We'd always known 13 is an unlucky number. I didn't have a good day at all.

To be sure, they started out with the best intentions. I got me a liver and fillet stir-fry in sesame oil with ginger for dinner but maybe it was too rich or the liver was too raw, but I had a little bit of diarrhoea 2 hours later. Then I got diarrhoea at home another 2 hours later. Everyone is waiting with bated breath to see if I would go at 2am.

So bated that they forgot to feed me kibble for supper. I reminded them enthusiastically but they only gave me 3 roo and packed me off to bed. That rounds up my 13th birthday.

I went to bed hungry.


Bad puns and homonyms

December 9th 2016 6:59 am
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Bloomberg told us that the South Korean parliament passed motion on their president. Yes, that woman is in deep shit.

Fomfomfom was telling ah bee that when everything is singular, nothing is singular anymore. But they assured me that I'm most singular. But of course - there's only one of me in the wholes wides world you know.


New garden

December 8th 2016 2:55 am
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The electricity didn't go off. And to think we prepared so much ice in the freezer so that the food won't go bad.

There's a new garden downstairs. It was the decomposing remains of the last brainwave of some smart people. They trucked in loads of sand and killed the grass and I went in to play. There were some saplings that grew so fast; they weren't there yesterday.

I got a nose full of sand.


First world problem

December 7th 2016 7:27 am
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We were informed that we won't have power from 2pm to 5pm tomorrow. That means I cannot blow aircon in the afternoon. Not even the fan. What will we do; it's been so hot lately. I know cha won't be home and fomfomfom has plans to start drinking beer at 2. We think ah ma might sneak off to the casino.

Maybe I can soak my feet in an ice bath. I wonder how long the ice in the freezer will last without electricity.



December 6th 2016 5:00 am
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It's been a 3 day heat wave now. Last week I was still shivering in the rain and now we're switching on the air con and using paper fans and drying our panties to a crisp. Like baking cookies. It's like an oven.

Don't we know it's december? Maybe we drifted a little bit coz of global warming or dropped a few metres because of all that shaking from the recent surrounding earthquakes and ended up in the southern hemisphere.

It's a heat wave, baby.


A wheelbarrow of orangutans

December 5th 2016 7:44 am
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There was a picture in the papers today of 6 baby orangutans sitting in a wheelbarrow. It's very cute. I think it's because they don't have hair. And then we read the article and it became very sad. They were being wheeled away because deforestation has caused them to lose their home.




December 4th 2016 6:07 am
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I saw that ah ma is recently very taken with me so I barked and barked in the morning for a roo. Alas. They overrode ah ma's timid suggestion and it was cruel city.

I had to change tack so I ate 88 kibble at night. Ah bee was so impressed she rained roo on me.

Ok, that's not quite true. The raining part.


Coz I am so cute

December 3rd 2016 9:16 am
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I decided to ask for one more tidbit after my dinner just now. So I sat outside the kitchen and barked. And barked. But no one went to get me the roo. They kept saying no no. But I am not one to give up so easily so I kept barking. Ah ma couldn't take it anymore so she came out and asked me what I wanted. So I told her and she went and got me what I wanted. And then she told everyone I looked so fierce when I was barking at her. So cute, she added.

I am so cute. And ah ma loves me.


No windscreen wiper

December 2nd 2016 3:19 am
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Today the LTA finally knew there was merit in my numerous complaints. The LTA officer came and was met with a container on a trailer abandoned by the side of the road. He scratched his head for a real long time over the missing engine and finally called his traffic police compatriot. They were still scratching their heads when we left.

They can just scotch tape the summons to the container, no?



December 1st 2016 8:30 am
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It rained the entire day today and it was cold when we went down. I started shivering and fomfomfom and ah bee said maybe they'll need to start bringing down a blanket for me. But that's only for when I'm sitting down. Cha had a better idea; she said we should ask ah ma to knit me a sweater. And because I won't let them pull anything over my head, the sweater will need to be worn like my harness, sleeves first. Then they will button it down my back.

Sounds more like a straitjacket to me. Whatever. As long as it'll keep me warm. It's winter you know.

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