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I hate traditions

February 20th 2008 10:04 am
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This one in particular. I was so happy when they forgot last year and I was hoping they would again this year. But noooooooo, they didn’t. Stupid girls. Every year during CNY, they would peel an orange and use the skin to make some sort of a hat for me. Then they would put it on my head and take a picture. Every year they’ll promise that the next year they would buy three pomelos and make pomelo hats for themselves but they never did. Anyway, so they were trying to get me to wear the orange skin but I refused to let them have their way. Ah bee tried to pick me up but I bit her. That’d teach her for making that hideous thing every year.

In the end they sort of gave up and we put the orange skin on Yongqi instead. We should do this from now on. By proxy.

And that was CNY 2005, if you were wondering.

 

Ah bee 2, Fomfomfom 1, Cha 0

February 19th 2008 8:45 am
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Lydia Sum passed away today. She’s only 61. Everyone knows that she has been sick for two years now but still, it’s shocking to hear the news. I feel so sorry for her daughter. She lost her grandmother and mother in a span of months. I know how she feels. It’s like when I was taken away from my Sugar mummy. But I have Ah ma now. She doesn’t. Poor thing.

As I am writing this, there is a bat downstairs. It flew across the room when Fomfomfom and Ah bee were watching tv. We aren’t exactly sure if it’s a bat but it sure doesn’t look like a bird. So it should be a bat. Anyway, Cha’s lucky she didn’t see the bat. She would have gotten a fright. That woman’s scared of flying cockroaches, what more a flying bat.

Before Ah bee got a chance to calm down, she got another fright. She was waiting for Fomfomfom to come up. She heard Fomfomfom walking up the stairs and she knew exactly when Fomfomfom would turn the corner and appear in front of her. But still she nearly jumped outta her skin when she saw Fomfomfom. That Fomfomfom had black gooey stuff on her face and she looked utterly frightful. Ah bee tells me that it was ugly. Real ugly. Like the creature from the black lagoon. I believe her.

Fright scores of the night.

 

Ah ma won $28 today at MJ.

February 18th 2008 7:50 am
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I really think she is getting better at this. She can take over the breadwinning in this house. Don’t be deceived when I say take over; there is no one to take over from. The current unemployment rate in this house, sans Merrilyn, is 100%.

Cha told Ah bee an unfunny joke just now. Fomfomfom laughed a little, saying it’s midly amusing. It’s something to do with naming Ah bee’s kids Ha, Mi and Gua.

Hurhur.

 

Cha likes lilies. Fomfomfom hates flowers.

February 17th 2008 9:08 am
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Ah ma scolded Ah gong just now because that foolish old man killed Merrilyn’s flowers. Merrilyn has been growing these pretty little pink and white flowers in the garden, in addition to the bitter gourd, and she has been tending to them everyday. Then that silly Ah gong comes along and fertilizes them to death. We all know Merrilyn must be devastated so Ah ma gave him a good scolding. He’s not to touch any plants but those three big pots of er, I don’t know what they’re called. They look like palm trees but they grow outta pots. Anyhow, he’s not supposed to touch Merrilyn’s flowers anymore. She has already started growing them pretty little flowers again. They will be safe this time round.

Ah bee got a fright just now when Ah ma said that she wants to look at the Edison Chen pictures. She told Ah ma she really shouldn’t, lest she gets nightmares at night. Then Fomfomfom came back and Ah bee told her about it. Fomfomfom said, “Just show her lah! Nothing she’s never seen before.” She has a point. But still no one showed Ah ma the pictures. I am not going to look at them coz I’m only a baby.

 

Little onion's a girl!

February 16th 2008 8:37 am
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I thought they were going to bring me to the gardens when Cha and Fom got changed. They went down without me and I got Ah bee to carry me. But somehow I ended up in her room again. I knew I wasn’t going to get to go out so I didn’t bother. I simply slept in Ah bee’s room until they got back. Then we went to the gardens.

We didn’t meet any friends but we saw a few dogs. There was a spaniel swimming in the lake. I can’t imagine the filth but he looked like he was having fun. I’ve never gone swimming before. I’ve got myself an inflatable pool but no one has ever blown it up for me. I should really get them to do it but I don’t think anyone knows where that inflatable pool is now.

Then at night, Cha and I watched Under the Tuscan Sun. It was my third time watching it. I don’t mind watching it coz it’s a lovely show. Much better than Taiwanese news. We also watched this programme about a certain tribe in the Yunnan province with Ah ma. I didn’t know Ah ma’s so liberal. You really can’t tell. *giggles*

Fomfomfom went to buy my kibble today. She is very sad coz in a few years’ time, I will have to eat kibble for “7 years up”. She says I am growing up too fast. But I don’t feel old.

Wo chai si sui.

 

Cha, you've been Pingfombee-ed

February 15th 2008 9:47 am
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You know when we said we didn’t go to the gardens after the visit to the vet? *giggles* We did! *giggles* So I went to the gardens twice today. That’s why I was so tired. And that’s why I didn’t poop the second time. *giggles* *giggles* Don’t angry hor Cha! *giggles*

Anyway, like I was saying, we went to the vet today. When we walked in, they said the vet woman’s not available coz she’s in surgery. So we had to see another vet woman. This one’s young and Fomfomfom didn’t quite trust her to squeeze my backside. So after she looked at my ears, Fomfomfom told her we wanted to wait for the vet woman who was done with her surgery already. I hope she wasn’t offended. We weren’t rude but after the last time that new vet man did a sloppy job with my backside, we only trust the vet woman. So we waited for her. She finally came out and asked, “Where’s my Pingping?” *giggles. I’m not hers but I like the sound of that. After the expression of my anal glands, Fomfomfom went to pay. She’s sore that the bill included consultation fees, an additional 30 bucks. She suspects the new vet woman billed that. And she wasn’t happy. Next time, she says, next time we must get an appointment with the vet woman. 30 bucks is nothing compared to her open position which blew up in her face whilst we were at the gardens the first time. Okay I shan’t remind her of that anymore.

Coz I love Fomfomfom for bringing me to the gardens twice today. Muacks!

 

Fomfomfom ate 5 eggs today.

February 14th 2008 10:42 am
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Ah ma threatened to inflict them with bodily harm if they dared bring me out in the sun. Of course we still went, silly. We just had to sneak out. *giggles*. But it really wasn’t hot when we were there today. In fact, the weather was so fine we stayed there for an hour. I love hour long visits to the gardens. And I made a new friend today too. We were sitting at the bench near the carpark watching the world go by when I spied two dogs playing in the distance. So we went closer and we saw another Maltese saying hello to them. We didn’t say hi coz we are antisocial creatures. We went back to our bench and shortly after the Maltese walked by. I barked at the Maltese coz I was on the bench and so I wasn’t afraid of him. He took one look at me and turned around. His owner said, “Snowy! Don’t chicken ah Snowy!” *giggles. He chicken.

Speaking of chicken, I had Three Cup Chicken today. I like Three Cup Chicken. It’s called Three Cup Chicken because that’s all you need when you cook this dish. You need a chicken and three cups. In those three cups, you need shaoxing wine, seasame oil and something else which I forgot. These are also the ingredients for another dish which my mamas love- ginger egg in wine. For that you need eggs, ginger, wine, dark sauce, sugar and sesame oil. That’s something women eat after they give birth, like pig trotters in vinegar. We had both today. That’s why Ah gong asked, “Who just gave birth?” when he saw them. He wish ah.

Maybe he’s ultra sensitive today because it’s Vday. I usually get a present from my sigui for Vday- last year I got Sexy Bone and the previous, I got a tug toy- but not this time. I shall tell myself that it’s because Ah bee didn’t get to see Jan yiyi today. Anyway, the latter’s all ruined now because I ripped it apart but I still sleep with Sexy Bone every night. I just don’t play with it all the time now, especially since I got Donut. I love Donut. I’ve got a sweet tooth like Ah ma who is driving Fomfomfom crazy with her eating. At least Ah ma did something guai guai today which made everyone rest easier.

Happy Vday to you and your family Boo!

 

Baobei baobei!

February 13th 2008 5:45 am
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We went to the gardens really late today. It was almost five when we left the house. That’s coz Ah ma kept scolding them for bringing me out so early all the time when it’s scorching. She says I’d get a heat stroke from staying out in the sun all the time. There was no mention of them getting heat strokes. Or unwanted tans. Coz they’re chopped liver. I’m different. I’m the apple of Ah ma’s eye. Pearl of her palm.

Which brings me to the palm tree in our garden. It has ants. Lots of things in our house have ants. The ant person came today and I howled up a storm while he sprayed. I imagine he must have shook his hips to my howling . Rhythm, baby. Howl howl howl, spray spray spray. He and me, we danced the tango, baby.

Then ah ma said I wasn't to go out of the house for 2 days coz of the pesticide. I pouted and within an hour ah ma had merrilyn scrub the porch clean for my nightly moon-tan session.

Which ah ma brought me out for. Then she ran upstairs for her news and left me in fomfomfom and ah bee's hands. Which no one has asked for. But I digress. I wanted only ah ma so I followed her upstairs promptly and left the spinster sisters sitting in the porch wringing their hands.

Ah ma cackled when I burst into her room in, well, a burst of innocent anxiety ( a girl searching for grandma, what's not to like?) and I got extra lovin'. Coz Ah ma loves me and I love ah ma.

 

I hungry.

February 12th 2008 8:24 am
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Fomfomfom had all the pineapple tarts in a plastic bag just now. And then she crushed them all. All that beautiful pineapple tarts, crushed and thrown away. She could have thrown them my way but I didn’t get anything. Not a crumb. Sigh. I wonder if I can use the money in my shoebox to get my own. I would love some of that cuttlefish and peanut cookies. Yummy. And bak kwa. I love bak kwa. Have I told you how much I love bak kwa?

I love bak kwa.

 

Sleeeeeeepy

February 11th 2008 8:01 am
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I am starting to think that Ah ma wasn’t kidding when she said she’s getting better at MJ. She won money again today. I think she should play MJ everyday. She can be the sole breadwinner of the family.

I’m still bushed from yesterday. I tried to take a nap just now but Ah bee kept staring at me and smiling to herself. I couldn’t sleep with her breathing down my neck like that so I growled at her. The more I growled, the more she laughed. Bugger only scrammed when Ah ma told her to get lost.

What will I do without Ah ma?

 
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