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No good technology

December 19th 2010 8:22 am
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Oh I'm in such a bad mood. My computer is not working well coz there's always an error on the page and I don't know how to rectify it. Then it took such a long time to get here on the iPhone coz the network is so lousy and the iPhone is no good for my mega paws.

So unhappy I am.

 

The one that flew away

December 18th 2010 8:18 am
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I was sleeping in the afternoon today when I heard the wind howl. Ah ma ran hurriedly to the balcony to bring in the clothes lest it starts to pour. She was holding onto her pants when a sudden gust of wind blew it outta her hands.

She quickly ran out and exclaimed to Cha, "My pants flew away!" Cha asked, "Was it your underpants!"

Well luckily for whoever, it was just her normal pants. Thank goodness; I wouldn't wish Ah ma's underpants upon anybody.

 

Panda P

December 17th 2010 6:50 am
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I'm the P. And ah bee's the P's B. And I'm the bee's knees.

And speaking of bees, they found that pandas love honey. You don't have to spank their backsides if you give them honey coz they'll be good and you will praise them. I love pandas. I haven't eaten honey before.

 

What I saw today

December 16th 2010 4:38 am
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I saw a broken white egg shell below a tree. It must have fallen from the tree. One less bird in the world.

I saw Doggie. She was wearing shoes coz it's a wet day. She doesn't have a name but she's got shoes. She trotted along like a dancing horse.

I think she doesn't like her new shoes.

 

The biggest loser

December 15th 2010 10:06 am
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My cousin Max (Ah bee insists 'Max' is short for 'Maximiser') is a great big lab who was forced to go on a diet. It was for his own good coz he was obese. And it has done him good because he now looks like a normal lab.

Except he's really not quite used to the downsized portions and he's taken to jumping into the tortoise's enclosure (gasp!) and eating its lettuce! (double gasp!)

Somebody tell him our ah gongs are wolves and he's a big disgrace to our ancestry.

 

Neglect

December 14th 2010 6:41 am
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It's been 11 days since they bathed me. Finally they remembered. I'm fluffy again.

But the psychological damage is permanent.

 

The hostess

December 13th 2010 6:16 am
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Everyone is finally back at home! And then we had visitors at dinner time and then again close to bed time. That got me real busy and ah bee praised me for being the hostess with the mostess.

Only now I'm terribly tired.

 

Funny duck

December 12th 2010 8:50 am
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My ah gong's sister's husband told ah bee about how he once wrote a letter to the CEO of one of the biggest banks in Singapore to complain about their ATMs. And he cced the prime minister's office while he was at it.

Somehow this takes 'bringing it up' to whole new levels.

 

Gloves

December 11th 2010 7:54 am
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Hmm. Everyone has been so busy. But I got my walks and meals, I guess I mustn't complain coz I'm a big girl now. During my afternoon walk, I saw 2 birds standing next to another bird's body. They didn't leave for a long time, not when I walked away. I guess maybe they were friends.

It was anal juice expression day. They bought gloves and did it. Apparently, they'd briefly wondered if they should buy the pack with 100 gloves. I crinched to hear that. What do they want to do with 100 gloves? Luckily common sense prevailed.

100 gloves? Really?

 

I'm 7!

December 10th 2010 5:34 am
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It is my 7th birthday today! My mamas have been telling me for ages that I'll be a senior citizen on my 7th birthday. Well, here it is. Here I am!

I spent the morning finishing up Braveheart with fomfomfom. It's 3 hours, mind. We took 2 days to get through it. I watched it with my backside coz I don't approve of Mel Gibson.

Then I realised no one is at home! Except for fomfomfom, that is. Who's always at home anyway, she's almost a non-entity. It is night and still no one is at home. I find it odd since there was so much fanfare surrounding the days leading up to today.

Something more important must have happened to keep cha and ah bee and ah ma and ah gong away on my birthday. I understand. Coz I'm a big girl now.

 
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