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I never thought I'll say this

May 28th 2014 9:14 am
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but I think I overdosed on liver today.

 

The ghostly sleeves and ugly pants

May 27th 2014 8:05 am
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Yesterday ah bee got sick so she wore this loose handmedown sweater thing. She shook the sleeves at me, so I attacked her. Today, she wore this pajama pants with houses printed everywhere. It was ugly so I attacked her again.

She really should wear less incendiary things. Make me angry.

 

Jerky

May 26th 2014 8:17 am
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I was so upset yesterday when they withheld my jerky for one whole day. I ask Ah ma if it's because the jerky is too expensive coz if money is the problem I have plenty in my shoebox.

That didn't work so I threatened both suicide and homicide. They finally relented and gave me very thin pieces of jerky.

Yay it won't be long before we go back to my old quota.

 

My stummy

May 26th 2014 8:14 am
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I started throwing up at 5am. I said I wasn't feeling well so Cha and Fomfomfom brought me down. Predawn walks are dun. I tried to catch a toad but they won't let me. So I concentrated on throwing up. Between 5 and 7am, I vomited 5 times.

And then one more time at 11am, but maybe that was just hunger. I'm ok now, but they won't give me my kangaroo jerky. They said I'm not digesting it. They tried to give me this freeze dried lamb thing but it's just inferior. I'm so upset I'm refusing supper.

They were so sorry they begged for my forgiveness. I shall have very angry dreams tonight.

 

Theory

May 24th 2014 7:31 am
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Did you know that if you stretch your skin while a mosquito is sucking your blood, it can't fly away?

We tried it today and we think it really works.

Now we also heard the thing about it exploding if you keep it from flying away long enough. I'll have to get back to you on that.

Seems a little cruel to me.

 

Happy

May 23rd 2014 8:39 am
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Today my good friend from Australia visited me. He and ah bee brought me for my evening walk. Actually I was already walking with fomfomfom. But they had no use for her, and neither did I, so we sent her home. And Nom yen's mummy gave me a treat.

I hope I'm not allergic to it.

 

Karma

May 22nd 2014 1:05 pm
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We were sitting at the bbq pit when we heard a splat. A bird overhead had decided to poop and it landed on the stone table where we were sitting. Ah bee cried out almost immediately; quite a lot of the poop had splattered on her arm. Then she kept telling fomfomfom she's not sure if her mouth was open. Giggles. That, my friends, must be karma for laughing at fomfomfom and I last week when we were pooped on.

Despite that, ah bee still thinks today is a beautiful day because her friend had managed to recover a bad debt from a shameless person. We are all very glad indeed.

 

Nom yen's first haircut

May 21st 2014 8:01 am
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Today Nom yen looked like a madman hacked at her fur. We found out that her mummy had bought grooming equipment and attempted to give her a haircut. We politely assured them the first time always ends up like that. It'll only get better, we said.

Then Cha told us about the Pomeranian who got a haircut and looked in the mirror. It walked on its hind legs for 2 weeks. PTSD, they reckoned.

Maybe Nom yen should go get therapy.

 

A very long poot

May 20th 2014 11:27 am
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Today Fomfomfom was carrying me off the stone bench when I let one rip. She thought it was Ah bee so she politely pretended she didn't hear anything. I was expecting Ah bee to assume the same but no, she's not made of refined stuff like Fomfomfom. She immediately asked Fomfomfom, "Was that YOU?" That's when I got found out. And then they kept laughing at me. Like cotton candy comes out of them.

In other news, the bad person came by unannounced in the morning. He was acting all coy and subdued and we are so not used to it. We think it's because his uncle was here too and he's scared of him. It didn't stop him from touching my toys again though.

It's okay I'm his big sister I guess I can share a little.

 

Sammi the scholar

May 19th 2014 4:51 am
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Today we tried to get sammi to guess fomfomfom's age. Sammi wasn't inspired, so to help her along, fomfomfom told her I'm 10 years old. To which sammi asked, why Xiaoping never go to school?

Because, as sammi tells us ad nauseam, SHE is going to school soon.

 
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