Turn Left Turn Right

Most vicious a woman’s heart

September 6th 2006 11:14 am
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My fomfomfom is one unfathomable woman. Sometimes she’s mysterious and alluring. Others she acts like she’s lost her marbles. Tonight she just lost it. Period.

It started innocuously enough- ah bee resorted to her usual trickery and grabbed me while I was trying to make my way down the flight of stairs.

Then they tried to clean my ears. Again. They do it every single day. So I did my thing- I tried to put holes in them hands. I thought we reached an understanding on this already. Quid pro quo, remember? It’s only fair.

After only half an hour of scoreless play, fomfomfom decided she wants out. Which is fine by me. No holes in them hands, no ear buds in my ears. Fair is fair. But no, fomfomfom had other ideas. She chased ah bee outta the toilet and soon after she left too. And horrors of horrors, she closed the door behind her before I could get out. That was when I realized I was being punished.

But for the life of me, I simply cannot figure out why she locked me in there. The last time I was locked in, it was by cha and it was coz I practically mauled their hands. That, I get. This, I don’t.

After 30 long minutes, fomfomfom finally opened the door. You should have seen me- I ran out as quick as my 4 cute little mega paws could carry me. Later, I tried to make up with my fomfomfom by licking her. I must reiterate that I wasn’t admitting any wrongdoing on my part; I was simply trying to placate her coz that fomfomfom is one petty woman. I, on the other paw, am how magnanimous. Erm, and also because she’s the one who buys me cod fish and all.

But that woman had the audacity to shun me! How dare she! No one, but no one shuns Xiao Ping! I was furious. I wanted to go downstairs to play with Mikasa to release some of that anger in my cute little belly. Ah bee went down with me and that fomfomfom followed. She kept all my toys and refused to give them to me, even after ah bee told her to. And when ah bee wanted to sayang me, she pushed me away from ah bee.

I really didn’t understand any of that. So just now I sat down and put my pretty little head to use. Then it hit me. That fomfomfom is not only petty; she’s vindictive. She must be still smarting over the backhand ah bee delivered to her ugly crooked nose last night. That must be it.

Sore loser.

 
 

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