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The Kill shelter and a New Forever home...It Rocks.

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Missing you so very much.......

March 25th 2013 10:17 am
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I do not write in your diary very see there is still not one day that goes by that I do not cry. Losing you is still so very hard. You should still be here with me. You were so precious to me and I miss you so very much. This morning when I woke up...that last day with you came rushing into my heart. The tears started flowing and I am not able to shake the pain. I feel like I failed you and how can I ever get over your loss. You who came to me because you were lost and nobody claimed you. How could any one have not wanted you. You became my heart and my laughter. You had a zest for life and loved everyone. You had nothing but love in your heart and you gave so fully to me. I could wish forever to have you back but that can never be. So I keep you inside my heart and in my memories. I keep you locked within my soul and I will love you and miss you forever. I just needed to tell you again how much you are loved and missed. You are my baby girl and you will always hold a special place within my heart and soul. I miss you sweet Lexey so very much.


Miss you so very much........

March 1st 2013 5:19 pm
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Lexey there is not a day goes by that my heart does not think of you. I loved you so very much and I will never get over losing you. Its so hard to look in the yard and not see my beautiful baby girl there...being her silly self. You always could make my heart smile. You were one in a million. How lucky was I to find you and have six and a half years with you. Thank you for blessing my life and for all the love you gave to me. I miss you my baby girl...I will always miss you. Love you to the moon and back...If I could I would search the heavens and bring you home to me again. Mom


Miss you each and every day...I will always love you baby- girl....

August 20th 2012 9:53 am
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My sweet baby girl. How are you you know how very much I love you. I talk about you to whom ever will listen. I always begin by telling people you were not just a were in my heart my sweet baby girl. I think when you do not have human children your dogs become them at least they do for me. YOU were my child. I tried always to protect you and do for you what ever needed to be done. That last I begged for someone to help save you.......there was nothing I could do but watch and pray and cry. I really think vets do not always know what to do in emergencies. If only they had placed chest tubes..if only. I will always say if only. That will never bring you back baby only adds to my guilt. Why did I not know how sick you were. How could I not know?? I carry that with me. I just wanted to tell you that I know you see my tears each and every day. I have not gotten over losing you. The grief grips my heart at times that it feels like I can not breathe. The tears flow so freely. You were my heart, my life, my laughter the joy. I miss you so very very much,. I send you kisses on angel wings each and every day. With those kisses is the message that I love you...and I will always love you sweet Lexey. You are my heart....forever and always. Your mom........


Beautiful girl missing you with all my heart...

August 2nd 2012 3:44 pm
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Hi Baby girl. How is mamas baby girl today? I know how much you hated to see mama sad. You always were there to lift my spirits on some of my darkest days. You and I journeyed through many happy times but also some sad times. Yet, you always brought joy into my heart. You made me happy and helped me see all the beautiful things that life had when you had someone to share them with. That was you baby girl. I would give anything to share at least one more day with you. I would spend each moment holding you and telling you how much you are loved and how special a baby girl you truly are. Each day comes and I miss you more. The tears come so easily and at times I am not sure that I will ever get over losing you. I know I have too. I know I have to remember the good times with you and not that last day. Today at work someone said something and I thought of you and the tears just started flowing and would not stop. I had to go somewhere so that no one could see my tears. I am sure I looked a mess the rest of the day but I could not help it. You see I miss you so very very very much. I miss you when I wake up in the morning, when I am leaving for work, during the day when I think of returning home without you and arriving home from work without you here...the tears come and I miss you. How very much you are loved baby girl. You will always be loved and missed. I send you kisses on angel have my heart forever. Love you so very much, Mom


The brightest star...........

July 29th 2012 6:25 pm
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Hi baby is mamas baby girl today? Do you know how much you are loved and missed? There is not a moment of the day that you are not in my heart. Last night there was a beautiful bright star...and as I watched it twinkling it reminded me of your spirit. How bright your soul was and how you had such a joyous happy personality. Each day was a new adventure for you. You were your own dog. Yes, you put up with me...but you had an independent nature. You loved to run and jump and smell everything around you. So as I watched that star last night the memories of the joy you brought in my life surrounded me. I felt your love and I hugged all those memories close to my heart. I miss you baby girl so very much. The tears still come each day...but I know in my heart that this is not the end. We will be together again someday. That day the joy that left me when you died will be instilled into my heart once again...never to leave. You are so loved and so missed. I send you kisses on angel wings...I hope they tell you how much I love you. Mom


Kisses on the wings of angels............

July 26th 2012 4:58 pm
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Hello my beautiful baby girl. How are you today. Have I told you how very much I love you. I miss you baby girl. I got in my car driving home from work and the tears just started flowing. The thought of not seeing you when I get home just breaks my heart. You were my baby girl and you were the one who always made my heart smile. There was just something different about you. Something that crawled into my heart and filled it with joy. I swear when I would come home you would greet me and if a dog could smile you would nudge me with your nose and look up at me with your beautiful eyes and smile. I miss that. I miss everything about you. Everything. Each night I sit outside baby girl and I look into the heavens and I blow kisses through the stars so that they can travel on angel wings and reach you. I hope you feel them and I hope with all my heart you knew how much you were and are loved. I feel for the rest of my life that there is going to be this big hole in my heart. You were so special. Most dogs are special..but there was just something about you that made my world a better place. I love you baby fast now and catch a star that has your angel kisses on it. Remember always YOU are so Loved. Mom


MIssing you so much baby girl...

July 24th 2012 4:52 pm
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Hi baby girl, how is mamas baby girl today. I love you sweet Lexey and miss you so very much. I keep trying to remember you as you spun and jumped and ran like the wind. You always were such a happy girl and had such a joy about you. You gave me so much, I feel like I failed you. How could we not save you that horrible day. What did I miss and how do I go on without you to brighten up my heart. I love you my beautiful angel and I will forever and ever. You made my heart smile and I will never forget the gift you gave me by sharing your life with me. I love you so very much. Mom


Missing you so much baby girl........

July 22nd 2012 3:44 pm
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Hi baby girl, how is mamas baby girl today. Are the angels giving you all the kisses I am sending to you. Each day is a struggle without you baby girl. There is not one second of the day that my heart does not grieve for you. You were such a good girl. Did I tell you that often enough? I wonder each day what happened? How could both your lungs collapse for no reason? I have never heard of anything like that in my life. Why you baby girl? I know in my heart God knew how much I needed you. How much joy you brought into my life. So why? People tell me it was your time. That your journey here on earth was done. That God only gave you to me for a while and that the time we shared was all I was allowed. YOU were a gift. You were my angel and my soul. I do not believe God took you from me. He knew how much joy you brought to me, and he knew how much you were loved. I will never ever understand the whys but one thing I do were loved by me. You never wanted for anything in this home. When they found you wondering the streets, covered in ticks......starving...who could have done that to you. All your whiskers had been burnt had been abused. never for one moment showed any signs. You were such a gentle, loving soul. You loved life, you loved your new home...and we were family. I am so very thankful that we found each other and that we got to share seven beautiful years together. I thank you for each day you graced my life with your joy and love. I was not worthy of you....No one was worthy of you. You were such a gift and I hope you know how much you were loved. Miss you baby tomorrow forever. Sending you kisses on angel wings......... I love you my beautiful Lexey.


The stillness of the night............

July 17th 2012 8:12 am
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Hi baby is moms baby girl today? I love you and miss you so very much. Last night when it was so quiet...I thought I heard you..but it was not you. You will never be here again and I fear I will never get over your loss. When the stillness of the night tears flow and I imagine how it used to be when you were here with me. The memories overcome me and I pray so hard that you can feel my love and know how very much the gift of your love meant to me. I imagine we are on a walk, with your nose to the ground taking in all the smells. Your zest for giving everything of yourself...when you would look at me through your beautiful eyes...I felt loved more than I have ever felt loved in my life. If you could did and I would hug you so close to my heart. I need to bury my face once again in your soft fur and take in your smell. I need to touch your paws and kiss your sweet nose. I need to watch you spin and jump and run so fast..or at least you thought you were running fast. Oh my baby heart breaks every time I think of you......its because I miss you so very much. I look in the clouds and imagine you chasing squirrels...and jumping through the stars. God gave you to me for only a short time...but in that time our hearts bonded as one...and that is how we will always be. I love you baby girl..I will forever. Through tears I send you kisses on angel wings...


The Spirit of an Akita..........I miss you baby girl.

July 11th 2012 11:45 am
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The Spirit of an Akita

I was standing on a hillside
In a field of blowing wheat
And the spirit of my Akita Dog
Appeared suddenly at my feet.

She looked at me with kind dark eyes
An ancient wisdom shining through
And in the essence of her being
I saw her love for me, too.

Her mind did lock upon my heart
As I stood there on that day
Then she told me of this story
About a place so far away.

I stood upon that hillside
In a field of blowing wheat
And in a twinkling of a second
Her spirit left my feet.

Her tale put my heart at ease
My fears did not fade away
She helped me know where she had gone
When she left me on that day.

"I live among God*s creatures now
In the heavens of your mind
So do not grieve for me, my friend
As I am with my kind.

My collar is a rainbows hue
My leash a shooting star
My boundaries are the Milky Way
Where I sparkle from afar.

There are no pens or kennels here
For I am not confined
But free to roam God's heavens
Among my Akita kind.

I nap the day on a snowy cloud
Gentle breezes rocking me
And dream the dreams of earthlings
And how it used to be.
The trees are full of liver treats
And tennis balls abound
Chew bones line the walkways
Just waiting to be found.

There even is a ring set up
The grass all lush and green
And everyone who gaits around
Becomes the Best of Breed.

For we're all winners in this place
We have no faults, you see
And God passes out those ribbons
To each everyone, even me.

I drink from waters laced with gold
My world a beauty to behold
And wise old dogs do form my pride
To amble at my very side.

At night I sleep in an angel's arms
Her wings protecting me
And moonbeams dance about us
As stardust falls on thee.

You picture me as I was on earth
Just before I died
The pain is gone I am whole again
Filled with Akita pride.

So when your life on earth is spent
And you stand at Heaven's gate
Have no fear of loneliness
For here, you know I wait."

Original Author Unknown - Adapted For All Akita's Who Died Too Young.

Hi baby girl, how is moms baby girl today. Do you know how very much I love you. You are in my heart each second of the day. My eyes fill with tears when I think of you. It is because I miss you so very much baby girl. I will always cherrish the time we had. It was not long enough. I needed about five hundred more years. I continue looking to the heavens for some sign you are OK...I know some day you will show me. Chase some squirrels and know you are my heart, my soul and the love and laughter that is now missing in my life. You are and will always be a part of my heart. I miss you more than words can described. Love you baby girl.....sending kisses on angel wings to you....

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Lexey..forever in my heart


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