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Big Brass Ones

So sue me.

February 9th 2006 8:24 am
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So… the biped tells me that Target is getting sued because… (drum roll, please)… their web site is inaccessible to the blind! So’s the Mona Lisa, of course, but Leonardo is beyond the reach even of the trial lawyers' association. Those of you involved in the visual arts and still above ground, however, should consider yourselves forewarned.

And it’s not just the blind that we have to worry about—after all if we stay vewy, vewy quiet, they may not be able to find us. But what about (to take a random example) the humor impaired? I wouldn’t want to leave myself open to a lawsuit from them. So, in a good-faith effort to make my diary more accessible, I am instituting close captioning for the humor impaired.

[The writer, who is not really a dog, but only pretending to be one, is engaging in what he apparently perceives as withering sarcasm. He evidently thinks it’s silly to sue other people because you have a problem for which they are in no way responsible. He makes a remark in questionable taste about hiding from blind people by being very quiet. He simultaneously makes an entirely gratuitous reference to Elmer Fudd in any of several Bugs Bunny cartoons. Then he makes fun of people who don’t think he’s funny... And he’s still doing it!]


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