June 17th 2009 8:55 am
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Whoa Doggies! I am a bit embarrassed. Here I am, *poked* fur Dogster of the Week and my diary is almost 2 years bee-hind!
*hangs puppy head*
It's been so long since I barked here that Snoopy the Eenie Weenie's Mom, Aunty M, has quit asking Mah-ahm when she was going to let me pupdate my diary.
I am quite honored to bee gracing the Dogster home page this week. I'm *poking* lots of new pals, too! For some of you newer Dogsters, I thought I'd repost one of my previous diary entries so that you, too, can learn howl to *poke*.
See, I am the original inventor of the Internet *poke*. I don't care what those Facebook people say, I, ME, Badger Hunter's Little Smokie started the whole *poke* revolution. Really, they weren't open to the general Internet population until September of 2006. The earlier versions didn't have all the neat things they have now.
So, as exhibit #1 in my pawsuit against them, here is my diary entry from November 21, 2005:
Nose *Poking* 102 - Refining your technique
Dog alive! Howl in the world could I forget the most important lesson in puppy training? Nose *poking* 101. I realize I have been doing this all my life. I'm sure instead of crying the minute I was born, I *poked* my dog-mom on the bee-hind. It just comes so naturally to me and I've been trying to teach everywoof the fine art and joy of a good nose *poke*!
Well, over on the forums, I have found out that the sweet little Bijou has perfected the fine art of the live nose *poke* for the first time! Congratulations my little Poodle nose *poking* protege! I'm so proud of her. *wiping tear from eye*
Bijou's story: The other night, Mommy was picking me up at the grandma and grandpa humans' house after her work. She and I were playing, and she was sitting on my bed. She stopped playing with me to talk to the grandma and grandpa humans, and when she wasn't paying attention, I snuck up behind her and gave her a good quick *poke* in the back!
Mommy burst out laughing and said "Bijou, only eenie weenies are supposed to do that!"
I've been doing virtual *pokes* for weeks now here at Dogster, but this was my first real-life *poke*!
Ahem, ahem! *pulls out small piece of paper with notes* I'd like to thank Dogster for giving me a place where I can learn important skills from fellow canines. I'd like to thank all the D members who supported me through the learning process. And most of all, I'd like to thank Badger Hunter's Little "Super Bionic" Smokie, who taught me and so many others the fine art of a good swift *poke* and the joy it can bring to the doggy bestowing it!
That's great Bijou! You did a wonderful *poke*! The sneak attack, drive-by pokes are the best! Catch them in their "unawares". *apaws* *apaws*
Troubleshooting Nose Poking
Does it seem you are invisible?
Your biped or bipedess ignoring you?
Poop on that!
Turn their attention back on you where it belongs!
White dogs, multi-colored dogs, short dogs and tall dogs unite and start *poking*!
Butch writes: Poke?? Is that like a "goose" in the human's rump? I'm good at that!
Brody writes: Wow Bijou! That is so cool. I'm really jealous of you and Smoke. I haven't quite figured that out yet. I just jump on my mom and run off and direct her to what I want her to be doing. I think a nose poke might hurt!
Skye writes: Hey Little Twin Smokie--I'll make ya' a deal, you take the low *pokes* and I'll take the high *pokes* --(Xena, isn't that how an old Scottish song goes?) -- that way we can be the total annoying package! I poked Mom at 5 this morning. It's easy to reach her when I stand beside the bed. How could she not think it was breakfast time??? Couldn't she hear my tummy growling? Thanks for encouraging us all to use this great form of communication.
Brody, anydog is capable of nose *poking* with the exception of a few nasally challenged breeds such as the Pug. Nose *pokes* aren't designed to inflict pain or damage. They're more of a gentle reminder, a prodding in the right direction if you will, that we're here and we demand attention and Pupcorn.
The basics of a good nose *poke* - it must be clean and wet as shown on my Dogster photo contest entry. One other important step I failed to mention there is that if the nose is cold, the *poke* is much more effective. A clean, wet, frozen nose *poked* in the right spot can produce the loudest squeals, highest jumps, etc. from the *pokee*.
We need nose *pokers* of every breed and height as humans have *pokeable* spots in various heights. *pounds paw on the podium* We cannot allow them to become complacent with the ankle nose *pokes*!!*pound* *pound* We must attack them on every level!*poke*
Thank you everydog for your support in my nose *poking* crusade. Together we will bring them to their knees (and bring those faces closer to us for kisses and so we can smell what they've been eating and not sharing)!
Humans! Bow down to the Puh-pay (because I'm down HERE)
Rosie writes: Hey, Smoke, I've got a *poke* issue. Every time I get my mum in the rear I get in trouble. Can someone explain to me what a "swimsuit area" is and why I'm not supposed to *poke* her there?
Rosie, I think Skye said it best....you *poke* where your nose is. No need to jump or crouch....just stretch that neck out straight in a quick out and away, then retract back to normal head position.
*stretch* *poke* *retract*
This should be done quickly like an eye-blink, no lingering in the *poke* position. If you linger, it turns into a *sniff*. Some humans are rather sensitive about being *sniffed*, so you may need to refine your timing with more practice.
If your Mah-ahm continues to have a problem with where you *poke*, perhaps she should invest in some platform shoes to raise the area she doesn't want *poked* out of *poking* range. (also platform shoes = longer chewing ability for those dedicated shoe chewers)
Rosie further fesses up: I will admit that my *pokes* have been mining expeditions on occasion! It's not my fault that my nose is the same level as her rear! I don't have plans to get much taller, so I'll put some platforms on her list to Santa - she's way too short!!
Zackary pipes in: Smoke! did you say, Catch em in their underwears? BOL! thats what it sounded like to me! and Rosie, "mining expeditions " BOL! too funny!!
Marlowe confirms: I, like Butch and Rosie "poke" right up the butt...HA, talk about getting someones attention!!!!!
Mining expeditions! *snicker* *snicker* *snort* *giggle* Bet my Mom is glad I can only reach her ankles and can't try rooting around in the swimsuit area like you taller dogs!
And it's root, root, root for the home team!
It's great when they're in unawares!
Just *stretch* *poke* then you *retract*
It's the nose *poke* game
*cheering on his taller nose *poking* recruits*
As you can see, clear as the *poke* of my nose, it all started right here on Dogster.
Smoke, Original Internet *poke*
September 15th 2007 1:57 pm
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Mom can walk again! Wooooooohoooooooooo!
*runs like a weenie-ac*
She still has her crutches, brace and now a cane. Most of the time, in the house, she doesn't have anything. If she's up cooking or cleaning, she'll wear her brace and take the cane.
Thank Dog! We won't have those darned scary crutches crashing and banging all the time now. Her cane has 4 feet on it so she doesn't have to prop it up against anything so it can fall over. Those crutches were really a pain in the bee-hind. It's enough to give an Eenie Weenie a heart attack.
*pats paw on chest over heart*
I hope she puts my booster seat back in the car. I haven't see my ladies at the gas store in dog years!
Smoke, ready to roll
August 18th 2007 5:50 am
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Our bummer summer is continuing here at Casa de Smoke.
*counts on paw*
There's Mom and her limpy leg.
Great Grandma Pete passed away.
It's hotter than the 4th of July.
Tess and I have both had poopie problems.
< sigh >
Tess stayed at Lailia's when Mom had to go to the funeral and I stayed with Jake the Slobrador. Welp. Tess got sick when she came home and ended up at the emergency vet last Friday night. Seems she might have picked up some spiral sheets at the spa.
Welp, you know howl things go with siblings. They gotta share everything. Including spiral sheets. Tess was a nice enough big sister to share with ME! Now I had to go to the vet yesterday. I got the "bum's rush" with the thermometer and 2 shots.
*hides under the big red chair and whines*
< sniff > < sniff >
*pokes nose out from under the chair*
What's that smell? Mom's cooking chicken and rice again! Woooohooooo! I knew it! When's dinner?
Smoke, anything for chicken and rice