~ Zaidie's Howse ob Haggis and Scotch ~

The Zaidie Levi Gee School of Dance

February 4th 2012 7:01 pm
[ View A Comments (22) ]

*ring ring ring*

"Hewwo. Zaidie Webi Gee Skool ob Dance. How I may helb yu?"

"Um, hello. I'm getting married this summer and my bride-to-be insists I learn how to dance by then or else!"

"Or else whut??"

"Well, you know, BIG trouble!"

"Oh, ob corse. I unnerstan compwetewy. Whut yur name r?"

"It's Bob."

"BOB???? Bob, dis r yu, my bweeder/bwoomer/boarder guy whu wets me, Zaidie, sweep on hims bed when I r on baycayshun at hims howse an' hims gwandkidses hab knowed' me since I wuz a lil' pubby guy an' den Bob's wife wuz bery sick an' hur went tu Heaven an' it wuz all so bery sad, bud eberypeeple r duin' bedder dese days, bud dem still miss hur wotz an' Bob r wunnin' da GlenRoslin Westies an' Scotties kennel pwetty gud, bud sumtimes him duz nod chek hims e-mails or hims boice-mail an' a coupla times dat meened I did nod ged bwoomded...BOL!... bud ebentuawwy I did cuz den Dadda called Bob's howse fone an' Bob sed,"Well, ob corse I wood wuff tu bwoom my lil' laddie pup named Zaidie an' him will always hab a bery speshul pwace in my hart cuz him wived in my howse 'til him wuz almost 4 monfs old..." an' Bob duz bwoomin' bedder dan any peeple on Earf, 'cept fur da one time when him went CWAZEE/nutzo an' cutted my furs tu short an' Momma cwieded cuz dat r whut wadies du, bud den my furs gwowed back an' eberypeeple, incwudin' Momma wuz habby once 'gain. Yu r dat Bob, Bob??"

"No."

"Oh. Whut yu du fur a wivin', Bob?"

"I'm an accountant."

"OMD! So I r!! Whu knowed?? Wite nexx door tu da 'Zaidie Webi Gee Skool ob Dance' r da 'Zaidie Webi Gee 'Ccountin' Serbices'. Wanna heer our motto?"

"Uh, sure..."

"'We figur out yur moneys an' den we take it.'"

"Nice. You do know that's illegal, don't you?"

"Illbeagle? No, I r nod ill an' I r nod a beagle. I r a Westie."

"Can you teach me to dance, though?"

"HA! I can teech yu how dance??? Ob corse I can, Bob. Why else I call dis pwace da 'Zaidie Webi Gee Skool ob Dance'? Yu wanna wern how dance? I teech yu!"

"Which dance do you specialize in?"

"Da Westie Stwut, ob corse."

"And...what else?"

"Well, if yu wanna ged weel fancy an' junk I cood teech yu how du da Westie Stwut backwards, I 'spose. I neber did dat afore."

"You teach nothing but this silly Westie Strut??? It's not even a dance. It's a silly, no, a ridiculous way to walk!"

"Bob. Seddle down. R dere any peeple dere wif yu whu cood wub yur belly tu helb yu calm down??"

"Hey, pup! I need to learn how to dance. The Westie Strut just isn't going to cut it, fur face."

"Now, Bob, dere r no need be nastee. If yu wanna dance, all we need du r turn on sum music while yu r Westie Stwuttin' an', boila, yu r dancin', my fwiend!"

"So...to dance well enough to please my future bride, all I need to do is learn to walk like you while there's music playing?? You are crazy! I can't believe you came highly recommended by the BBB. An' your 'business', where is it? Does it even exist??"

"Ob corse it duz, Bob. Da LWD Cwubhowse unnerwent a majer weconstrucshun wast yeer. Da 'Zaidie Webi Gee Skool ob Dance' r wocated in da nu wing...Now wemme fink...it r on da forf floor. When yu ged off da elebator, yu turn wite. Den weft. Den wite, I fink. NO! Weft! Den yu..."

*dial tone*

"Bob? Yu r dere, my fwiend?? Bob? Hmmm, I gess him r on hims way ober!"

~ Dis r da End ~

 
Barked by: Coco Rose (Dogster Member)

February 4th 2012 at 7:19 pm

Hi Z-pup,

If Bob calls back I can come over and teach him how to shake his groove thing cuz I'm real good and very light on my feet.

♪♫...Shake your groove thing, shake your groove thing,yeah, yeah
Show 'em how we do it now Shake your groove thing, shake your groove thing, yeah, yeah Show 'em how we do it now...♪ ♫

Coco Rose
Barked by: Luna (Dogster Member)

February 4th 2012 at 7:38 pm

Yu sur kno how tu make my momma waff. When hers weads yur diawe hers waffs so hard hers eyes week.

I du nod kno how tu dance so I can nod bee ob any help.
Barked by: Fizzy (Dogster Member)

February 4th 2012 at 7:51 pm

Bob doesn't sound like a very nice person. Bob the customer, not Bob the groomer guy. You don't need customers like that, Z-pup!
Barked by: Hershey (Dogster Member)

February 4th 2012 at 7:58 pm

Aw, fur a minute there I thought Bob the Groomer had found a new Mrs. Bob! But then, he's probably already a master of the Westie Strut, isn't he? I think you're just as well off without THIS Bob!
Barked by: Monty (Dogster Member)

February 4th 2012 at 10:07 pm

I don't like that Bob one bit. He just sounds mean and that isn't okay.
Barked by: Mr. Cutter (Pssst on the Right (Dogster Member)

February 4th 2012 at 10:09 pm

Did he have 2 left human feet? Even I can do a crazy dance to music.
Barked by: ☀ Whitley ☀ (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 1:25 am

Doin' da westie strut are very important! I could also teach my shake your bootie, backing-it up dance if you is looking for dancing instructors HunBun!
Barked by: Jelly (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 1:40 am

If you are hiring I am an excellent instructor for the Affie Dance. I could head south to help you out.........
Barked by: Charlie (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 4:42 am

Z-Pup, yu dont need a customer like Bob, bud nod Bob da Gwoomer guy. Awso, a 'ccountat DANCING??? Think 'bout it. Betcha 'ccountant Bob du da wite-man's oberbite thing, tu. Nod pwetty. *head 'splodes*
Barked by: MrJackFreckles~SirLick-a-Lot (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 4:45 am

I could help you teach that Bob-not-Bwoomer to do an original dance move or even a whole series of them by doing my own dance on my hinders feetses and then giving his hinder a bite or two...BOL!

Zaidie, you are so furry funny!
I missed this yesterday, but its a great way to start off the new day, BOL! Dance on, OK?!

Woofs!
Barked by: Zoe (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 6:36 am

I had always heard that white dogs can't dance.
That just shows you can't believe everything you read on the internet.
Barked by: Zaidie (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 10:59 am

BOLBOLBOL, eberypup :D

Charwie! I wuff yur nu pichur ob yu bein' a lil' white puppy guy!!
I neber finked 'bout da danger an' horror inbolbed in dancin' 'ccountants. Dat wuz cwose! Bud I shooda knowned cuz bof my gwampas r 'ccountants an' dem r NUTZO :D

"White dogs can't dance" BOL, Zoe :D

I r gwad yu pupses waffed an' stuffs. Once 'gain, I r scwapin' da bottom ob da *Possible Diawy Entwy Ideas* barrel.

Mabbe I need wescue sumfing 'gain!! Wemme fink 'bout dat.
Barked by: Flicka ~ CGC (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 12:36 pm

Sigh........

Some folk just arent grateful are they ?

Hugssssssss
Barked by: HarleyDavidson THD, CGC (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 8:11 pm

HD gets his fiddle out and starts to play the Bombshell Stomp!
Yee Haw, ya'll!
Barked by: ☀ Finley ☀ (Dogster Member)

February 5th 2012 at 10:34 pm

HunBun, while Whitley is teachin' 'em how to "Back it Up".. I can teach them how to do the Finnigator... it's on my page... and then Whitley and 'em how to do the "Westie Party!!"
Barked by: Petey (Dogster Member)

February 6th 2012 at 4:55 am

looks like Bob needs an attitude adjustment too....
Barked by: Hamish McDuff (Dogster Member)

February 6th 2012 at 5:30 am

BOL, BOL you are so funny. We needed that laugh. I don't exactly dance but Mum says I prance and I skip. Of course I do the Scottie strut, that is taught to us before we go to our forever homes.
Barked by: Zaidie (Dogster Member)

February 6th 2012 at 7:00 am

Weely yu shood be wearin' a kilt when yu du da Westie Stwut if yu wanna be aufentic. Dat r a mistake wotza pupses make :D
Barked by: Wesley (Dogster Member)

February 6th 2012 at 12:47 pm

I do the Wesley wiggle and back roll,perhaps Bob would like those---BOL!
Barked by: Charlie (Dogster Member)

February 6th 2012 at 1:18 pm

My dance is the Charlie ChaCha. But I reely want tu lern tango cuz all the gurl pupses like that stuff, even tho Mom says I'm too short and can't make those fancy leg-lifty moves like they du in Argentina or Armenia or sumeplace.

Speaking of leg lifties, I laffed WOTS when I sawed yur privacy please at that big pole in yur Westie Strut video. 'specially how yu looked up at yur Momma afterwards. BOLBOLBOL. That was reely funny, Z-pup!
Barked by: Mini Mischief (Dogster Member)

February 12th 2012 at 6:51 am

BOL! BOL! ROTFLBO! Mommy laffed and laffed with this diaree entry! You don't need customers like dat, Zaidie!
Barked by: Buddy Morris (Dogster Member)

February 17th 2012 at 8:38 am

Zaidie the Morris Pack would love to learn the Westie Swut! We dont do much dancing around here. Mom just loves reading these, it makes her laugh so much and we like seeing her laugh!
Woof Woof, Buddy

 

Zaidie


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