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The Daily Poop by Lucy

Farewell my sweet angel, Lucy (7/96 - 10/07)

Sweet Lucy fought long and hard through her illness. She far surpassed the two months the vets said she had left. After her leg became swollen, she was put on antibiotics that reduced the swelling and gave her a little boost. She was once again wanting to walk a little further and to stay outside a little longer. But during the last two weeks it became apparent that the cancer was taking its toll. I was so torn as to whether it was right to let her go when I felt she was still very much here, seemingly happy, smiling and wagging her tail. I thought that surely she'd let me know when it was time. But last week her condition deteriorated rapidly and we knew that it was time to let her go with dignity. This weekend we spent a lot of time with her. My sister visited as did many friends and I know she loved the attention as she smiled and wagged her tail a lot. She was always such a people dog. Sadly, today we had to let our angel go. She was the same brave, strong and stoic little girl right up until the end. It was a very tender and peaceful moment. I know it's for the best but my heart is broken and I miss her terribly already. Thankfully, I can take some solace knowing that she's running, chasing balls (and maybe some squirrels) and climbing trees again in heaven. My dear, sweet Lucy. I miss you. I love you.

Almost 7 months and counting .... ?

I'm writing this entry with a very heavy heart. It's been almost 7 months since Lucy was diagnosed with osteosarcoma. She's been doing pretty well up until about a month ago. Her walks are now very abbreviated and she's very lethargic. Then this weekend her "bad" leg became swollen. I just don't know what to do. She doesn't seem to be suffering but she's definitely not like she used to be, for the most part. On one hand, she just lays around except for when she goes out for a walk or eats (and she doesn't always finish her food - she still loves and demands treats though). But on the other hand, when I come home from work she makes the effort to get up and come to the door to greet me, big smile on her face and her tail wagging. So I'm completely torn. Am I being selfish to not want to say goodbye yet? Is she suffering but being the stoic little girl she's always been? Or is it not time yet and she's still got more living to do? I wish she could tell me. I'm taking her to see the vet this evening so I'll see what he has to say. I'm sure I won't like the answer I'm given but, I don't know what I'm going to do. This is so hard. I'm already crying and there haven't been any decisions made. I just don't want to have to make "the" decision.

Lucy Forecast - SUNNY & BRIGHT!

Since that pretty awful day back in February when we learned that Lucy was ill, we've had lot's of ups and downs. But I'm happy to report there have been more ups than downs. We took her to an oncologist a few days after the initial diagnosis for a follow up and it was more or less confirmed (to the extent that it could be without a painful biopsy) that she does have osteosarcoma. I had already made the decision that I didn't want to put her through the ordeal of surgery and losing her leg so it was more for us to know for sure. At first we kept her on Rymadil and Tramadol as prescribed by the vet and she seemed to be doing fine and starting to use her left leg less. Going forward though, we knew that we should probably look to other methods to make her comfortable and to maybe combat the cancer. Thanks to Lucy's very loving and generous aunt Cheryl, we took Lucy to see a Holistic Vet to look into alternative methods and medicines (aunt Cheryl also talked me into changing Lucy's diet away from foods with lots of additives and unnecessary grains/carbs; shortly after changing her diet the whole food scary dog food recall happened). Dr. Fallek saw Lucy and again confirmed what we had been told previously. She was very honest and up front about everything, which I appreciated. She said that Lucy's condition was pretty advanced and that there wasn't a lot she could really do apart from making her comfortable, etc. Dr. Fallek thought she could give Lucy a few months more. That was almost 3 months and over 1000 pills ago (8 in the AM and 5 in the PM) .... and I really think they're working! Lucy is still the happy girl she was before all this. She loves visitors, saying hi to everyone on her walks and greets me at the door when I come home, albeit on 3 legs for the most part. She is a "tripod" when she walks but, still puts her "bad" leg down to support her when she's standing. I spoke to Dr. Fallek on Monday and she was pleasantly surprised to hear that Lucy was doing so well. She reiterated that she didn't think Lucy would have lasted this long much less flourishing, so to speak. So, we still take one day at a time but for now we're hopeful that Lucy stays with us for a lot longer as she's still young, and has a lot of living yet to do. And, I'm not ready to say goodbye .... not by a longshot.