A New Royal Appointment!

Hear Ye Hear Ye!

Tis I my darlings and I am most pleased to announce the Royal Appointment of Samson, who will now be known as Page and Junior advisor to my wonderful Royal self! We are planning a most Royal welcome for Samson and his mother, Lady J, who are moving from Canada to become part of our happy and dignified household.

It is so wonderful to bring new blood into the mainstream of kingdom life. And to start training one early in connection with Royal responsibility, Noblese oblige, is ever so marvelous. It is refreshing that Samson will not lower himself to common dining and already Lady J insists on nothing but the best in nourishment for the young Page Samson.

Ah, my dear courtiers, the excitement of even thinking of all this has Us very fatigued, time for the Royal nap.

Visions of Sugarplums.....

Well my darlings, another year has come and gone and the royal domain is all a flurry of activity as the humans rush about looking for marinated rawhide, greenies and savory rib bones for the royal stocking.

I am still not sure why the humans insist on blinky lights and a fake tree... natural trees are much more fun to try chewing when one is bored! I have noticed that on the television most trees have lovely packages to unwrap and I certainly am very capable of unwrapping..but there are no gifts under our tree..... hmmmmm... I wonder why my humans don't want We Royals to open their gifts? Would it not be most helpful to accomplish the task early on so they can relax from their dedicated labors to Us???!

Of course, nothing pleases we royals more than the exquisite aromas eminating from the kitchen of our comfey cozy abode. Surely, the extra ham and spaghetti casserole must be for MY dinner. I wonder what the humas will eat to celebrate? Hmmmm, perhaps I should be kind, generous and share the bounty.... oh, why not? If Scrooge could spare a goose for Tiny Tim, certainly I could do better, being the wonderfully loving Royal that I am.... cannot afford protests from the royal subjects! At any rate, I am not moving from the observation level during the preparation, after all, it is MY food!


Fa la la la la, and a Good King Wenseslas to you all!

They Shall Not Eat Cake!

Well my loyal subjects, I must confess that even we Royals do succumb to mischief now and again. Yesterday as I was strolling through the kitchen I came upon, of all things, a freshly baked birthday cake. My human had been preparing this cake for her daughter's birthday, but there was no one about at the moment.

I being Royal and quite the professional taste tester decided that no good birthday celebration is complete without verification that said cake is worthy, I mean truly WORTHY of celebratory events!!!

Early in life we Royals are trained to find valuable items and certainly a freshly baked cake hidden under a towel at the back of the stove qualifies. Imagine my joy at finding the cake was better with each tasty mouthful.... oh dear, hmmmmm.... not much cake left. No one would notice all those tiny crumbs on the floor if I leave the cake plate towards the back of the stove. Oh yes, and no one will notice the crumbs all over the stove since they have fallen down into the flame pans.... Where is that footman with the dustbroom????

Alas my darlings.... the deed was discovered and I was exiled off the island for the remainder of the evening. A new cake was baked and is now hidden in the microwave away from my most capable testing jaws. I will have to go to the Royal chapel and pray that the humans are not disappointed without further Royal quality control.

The Royal Cure

Hello my darlings! Thankfully I am doing much better and the palace surgeon has advised my staff that my wound has healed so well that the Royal fur coat may show little to no evidence of that terrible attack we sustained! My dears, as a public figure appearances count for a great deal as you may well imagine.

Enough about me for the moment... I have been greatly distressed over the physical condition of my human these days. I must confess I did overhear one of her phone convo's and it would seem she is suffering from an upper respiratory illness. Tsk, Tsk... no Royal strolls for the rest of the week. Perhaps I shall take up embroidery in my spare time to avert the boredom.

In the meanwhile, I shall continue to apply the centuries old Royal curative of more kisses and licks than my human can stand to convince her it is time to spring out of bed for a walk!

Etiquette Classes My Darlings!

Alas my dear ones, I have no way to fully communicate how difficult it is for we Royals to appear in public without adequate bodyguard protection. Last Sunday, whilst strolling with my human I was rushed and attacked by two commoners. They came from nowhere and certainly if they'd had proper training in the finer art of caninesque they would have been on leash and offered salutations in a more appropriate fashion.


I am now nursing a surface wound the size of a silver dollar American, and the royal caretakers have yet to determine if the royal fur will re-grow there. Ah.... Coco Chanel.... please tell me you have added to your fine line of beauty aids and send my make-up crew forthwith!

Part of the fine therapy being offered to soothe my wracked nerves... extra BBQ rawhide.... ah....... And poached salmon, ever so lightly seasoned with lemon and parsley. At least the royal breath is good ;-)

It would appear that I need to re-think the strategy for my strolls, as yesterday another brigand approached and I made a narrow escape. Certainly We shall be taking a different walking route today!

I tell you dear ones, maintaining the Royal dignity, sociability and image is so trying!

Fa La La La La...

Ah yes my sweets, it is the most wonderful time of the year!

My human and I went out last evening for a stroll to admire the lights in the neighborhood. Granted, the animated deer did catch my attention, but their appearance was rather plain in comparison to the lovely hanging icicles and lifesize elves.

Once again I can see how fortunate I am to live this life of privilege as there were no other canine relatives out and about for the holiday season. More's the pity and I shall pray for them whilst my human is at church on Sunday.

Have a happy xmas and brilliant New Year all!

xoxo
Peaches

In Recovery

What a weekend I have had my darlings. Somehow during my busy schedule I let time get the best of me, and as I rushed about I sustained a dreaded wound to my left rear foot and leg. Fortunately, my human thoroughly researched the finest in medical facilities and I was taken (by limo of course!) to a hospital and endured a tenuous two and one half hour surgery. My goodness, even my stitches had stitches! My surgeon was so very thoughtful in recognizing how one must maintain a high level of fitness for running even during retirement, and I must say I am springing back to my wonderful graceful self. It is mahvelous as always to be waited upon and given the extra attention I so deserve. You know what they say about me... well it is all true!!!!!

Thanksgiving Is Upon Us!

I am just totally exhausted from an extremely eventful week! I made my first official visitation to become acquainted with gentlemen who are, how shall I say, renewing their life's goals and ambitions after a slight "misunderstanding with the law and stressors of everyday existence.

To begin our day, my human and I got in the automobile and had a lovely journey for 'bout half an hour til we arrived at our destination, a palacial institution, with lovely parks and landscape which would certainly bring the green of envy to any common breed. After strolling a bit and getting my bearings (I do wonder if there is a website for bear pets?), I was greeted by officers of the state and escorted by my human to the domicile of 51 gentlemen, some of whom had not seen or touched a canine in over 12 years. Imagine!

After reviewing the troops and becoming familiar enough to lick and jump like a bunny for joy of all the respect and attention I could demand.... oh dear, pardon, for a moment I forgot that I am not just any canine, but the royalty of all... just a moment I must have the chambermaid brush my coat.... Ah, much better. At any rate, after a 5 hour long visit I came away feeling loved, useful and of service to my great country and its people.

Even we royals can get too much love. No wonder I need to nap and walk and nap and eat and nap.
I am so thankful for the opportunity of service. I received more than I was given.