That's My Story and I'm Sticking To It!

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The Day in the Life of the Dkkivinest Diva

February 8th 2008 7:57 pm
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Well, it was one of dose very very busy days **Jenna lays back fanning herself** I slept in until 11 a.m. and den I yawned **holds paw beside mouth and whispers** dats my exercise and den I moved to da living room where I got up on da couch **Jenna yawns**...I rested until 11:30 a.m. when I finally had to make a widdle girls room break **winking**. Well it was cold and I certainly wasn't going to stand out in da cold, not good for a girl's complexion. I came back in where I retired to da recliner. **Jenna smooths her coat...checking her nails** Where daddy brought me my lunch. Den I watched some t.v. wid daddy...**stretching out as long as she can** and I took a beauty nap. Shortly after dat mummy came home and she wasn't feeling well so being the trooper dat I am **Jenna pats herself on the back** I got back in da recliner wid mummy and we took a nap. Well next ting you know it is time for din din...well daddy fixed dinner **holding her nose up** nuffin for moi...grilled cheese and tomato soup...ick...hoomans! **Jenna sticks nose really high in air until she tips over on her back** oopsie **Jenna stands back up trying to pretend nuffin happened** well anyway. Den mummy wanted to play ball so I placated her and played for a while and den she got tired again and we went in da bedroom and got in bed. **Jenna gives out a very loud yawn** Time for nighty night...well a girl can't get enough beauty sleep you know? **Jenna winks and gives just the slightest hint of a smirk** Dat's my story and I'm sticking to it...Love Divine Jenna

 

No Spittles and No horn dogs in my house EVER!

January 22nd 2008 12:57 pm
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Okay here goes how my day has gone! **sniffing and sobbing in hankie** My daddy's friend [notice I say MY daddy's friend] came over with a spittle and a new doggy. Well I avoided da spittle at all costs, but I wanted to sniff and get to know dis new doggy. Widdle guy, just a puppy, so we played and played and we ran and we sniffed and we ran and we sniffed and I let him play wid my toys [I know...I know you are saying to yourself "Jenna shared?"...go figure] and before you knew it...**sniff sniff...honk honk...snorkle...honk...sniff...crying uncontrollably*** da doggy was being petted by MY daddy...notice I said MY daddy...as in MY daddy, mine, all mine, exclusively mine, nobody else's but mine, MINE MINE MINE...***stomping widdle feet*** Well I went over and sat in front of Daddy and I was tinking he would be bright enough to read my mind so I sat there staring at him sending him my toughts, but NOOOOOOO, he must have been sleeping cause it works when I have to go potty! So I tried jumping into his lap...daddy doesn't have a lot of lap, so I tried to jump again and I tried until I got on his lap...***sticking tongue out*** so there you widdle stinker...don't get near my daddy, my mummy, my grammy, my stuff, my territory, my home -- yes I said my home, I used to live in a bar, so I know when I gots a good ting and living here is pretty cushy -- so don't even tink about stepping on MY territory. and do NOT I emphasize NOT bring spittles or dogs that will horn in on other dawgs territory (a spittle is a hooman under da age of 18) in MY HOUSE! ***holding paw to head*** I must go lie down in my bed, da one I share wid mummy and daddy, well dey have to have a place to sleep too you know, this has been an exhausting day. Dat's my story and I'm sticking to it! ***falling back on bed in a swoon*** Poozer

 

Please vote for moi

January 14th 2008 12:44 pm
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VOTE FOR THE DIVINE ONE AS THE FAIREST OF THEM ALL

this is the link to vote for moi! I'm in my finest duds and would appreciate you letting the world know what you think of my outfit.

Your Divine Miss Jenna Pooh

 

Christmas time = Spittles and Santa

December 18th 2007 2:24 pm
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Now here's da new twist on my cursed life [Jenna pacing back and forth]. Da spittles are coming on Sunday and mummy says I have to be locked in da bedroom so they can't get to me [puts her head in her paw]. Also Santa is coming and I don't like da fat guy [shaking her head]. He hugged daddy last year and I was close to taking his head off [pretending like someone is holding her back]. But da spittles...Buddy fly here and get me will ya? [holding paws together in a plea]. I don't like those spittles they tug at me and take my balls and my stuffies and take all my mummy's attention away from moi, I don't like it I tell ya [tapping widdle paw]. Mummy said they could come and she never asked me how I felt about it [pouting]. Well I would have said NO! No way! Lock me in da bedroom will ya. Hey its better dan da old days when I got left outside cause wait a minute...soft bed, t.v., treats...hmmmmm not a bad idea [holding paw to chin and looking up]! I'll have to get back to you on dis one...I have to tink it over. rofbmbo - Love Jenna

 

Over da river and tru da woods to grammy's house we- gooooooooooooo!

December 8th 2007 8:56 pm
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Yippeeeeeeee...we gots to go see grammy today and she gave me cheeeeeeeese! She always has cheese for me...more cheese please...blink my eyes...grammy told mummy to go get me some more cheese and mummy said no and I sat there and blinked my eyes and grammy yelled at mummy and said mummy was going to make me cry (rofbmbo) ... oh dat was a good one. Dat's my story and I'm stickin' to it! Love Jenna

 

Christmas is coming da goose is getting fat!

December 2nd 2007 3:39 pm
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Well I don't know about any of you, but here at my house der are trees everywhere. [scratching head] Mummy says one of da trees is mine, but it is awfully high up for dis grrl to relieve herself and I can't get to any of da stuffies. [rofbol] Stuffies everywhere...all over da place...and I can't have one to chew [rolling eyes] She is putting boxes and boxes of stuff with paper all on da outside and I get up on da boxes and she shoos me off...[tapping widdle paw] I don't get it! Der are stuff inside dat's yours and dey don't want you to get it. [shaking head] Hoomans, go figger? Anywho, ders a stocking shaped like a bone stuffed wid something mummy says is mine. [looking up at stocking, tilting head one way and tilting head da udder way] If it is mine, why can't I have it? Silly mummy. She says I have to wait for Santa Claws...[scrunching up face] I wonder if I've ever met him. I know John and I know Grammy, but I never heard of Santa Claws before I moved here. [sitting down and patting head with hankie, sighing] I hope he's really really nice, cause if he's a cat....nummmmmmers! I certainly hope da Poop kitties forgive me. [blushing] Well mummy says I have to be good until the 25th, silly mummy I'm always good [winking] Good night -- dat's my story and I'm sticking to it! Love Pooh

 

Da line has been crossed in the Dawg/Cat War in Hector, New- York!

November 30th 2007 8:00 pm
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My friends I made it back from da battle front [Jenna holds her paw to her heart]...battle is not pretty my friends...especially when da enemy is cats, an army of vicious cats...sneaky, mean, fighting cats...now I’m not saying all cats are vicious [snarling]...me loves da Poop kitties, etc. etc...but da cats dat live in wine country, New York State are vicious and sneaky. Der are four cats in dis particular army. Now I know dey have been having der battle ready meetings cause dey were laying in wait to attack. Mummy got me by da first cat...hah! Mummy wouldn’t let me at dat cat...dats okay...mummy isn’t always watching! But da second cat, da one I believe to be das general! Got me...I was wounded [holding face]. Blood was drawn and it was mine, dey got my snout and eyelid...oh no, [waving paws frantically] my friends do not get faint hearted...it was just a flesh wound...really...sniff sniff snorkle snort honk [holding paw to forehead]...mummy saw blood all over da floor and tought it was from da cat...but she saw it was coming from moi! Being the warrior I am (dats why dey call my Poozer da Broozer) [standing at attention with chest stuck out] a little blood was not going to stop me from getting a taste of cat. No no...cat mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, nummers. But mummy did! Darn her. As soon as dat cat drew blood it took off, smarter dan it looks trust me! Den der was da cat sitting outside of da sliding glass door just tormenting me [wiping eyes with hankie] – daring me to come tru dat glass to get it...but mummy held me back [pretending to wrestle with invisible mummy]. Dey may have won dis battle, but ha ha – dey have not won da war [holds paw in air]. Dat’s my story my friends from da battle front [salutes]. Private Jenna Pooh of da Dawg Army!

 

Christmas Tag

November 25th 2007 11:41 am
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I've been tagged by Bailey, NPC for Christmas and I have to write a letter to Santa with five requests:

Here goes:

Dear Santa Claws:

My name is The Divine Miss Jenna Pooh and I know you know me cause you leave me presents every year! But this is my first letter to you with my wishes for Christmas:

1. I would really like it if you would bring Mellow home to her mommy and Kokoa Girl...they both miss her so and I believe that you and God will help.

2. I would really like it if you could help Dancer's mummy with her problem...we both know what that is and I know you and God will help.

3. I would really like it if you could give mummy her wish from the VA and give her and daddy just enough money to pay off the mortgage and then mummy could stay home with me full-time. I really really would like it for her because of her disabilities and I know that you and God can do this for her they don't really want more than that.

4. I wish that you could put my husband Buddy of Corolla in my stocking for me at Christmas.

5. I would really like it if you could make all the sick doggies and cats well again for their mummy and daddy's sakes. I would give up 3 and 4 if you could make this wish come true.

Now I'm going to go tag someone else for Christmas -- Lil Sassy.

That's my wishes and I'm sticking to it. Love jenna

4.

 

Army of Cats

November 23rd 2007 6:54 pm
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Everyone...I am writing dis my last Will and Testament...no please let me explain... I am going to see da army of cats tomorrow and mummy said not to worry, she'd keep me from da cats. Ha! Mummy you are good, but dey are better! Dey smart, dey tricky and dey are everywhere...I swear to you, Mummy says they only have 5 cats, but I know dey multiply in da middle of da night...each one sitting somewhere to torture me. So I must write this to put my affairs in order. Buddy, my loving husband, to you my favorite toy Mr. Caterpillar...protect him and keep him safe will ya my love? Lil Sassy to you my loving niece, to you my favorite teddy bear, but please do not tell anyone that I had an addiction to teddy bears please. Goofball, my loving brudder in law, to you my food and water bowls. Dey are precious to me and I know you above all udders will love dem da most! Weedle, my sweet sister-in-paw, I give to you my stuffed angel, you will luv her like a sister....oops mummy says its time for bed...I have so many more loved ones to remember...but da rest, please just take turns choosing something from my oversized pile of stuffies, collars, outfits, coats, etc. Sniff sniff...I will be brave and I will put up a courageous fight...hugs and kisses to all. I am off to war. Good night and take care. Dat's my story and I'm sticking to it! Love Jenna

 

My opinion

November 16th 2007 7:11 am
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To all those I offended and lost a friendship over this week by speaking my mind...I am sorry for your loss of a friend...for those who don't agree with me and respect my right to speak my mind and offer an opinion and choice, thank you for being my friend and respecting the fact that we do not have to agree on everything...and for those of my friends who supported me and backed me, I thank you for your support and backing and respecting my right to an opinion and my opinion.

Enough said...that's my story and I'm sticking to it!

Love Jenna Pooh DePasquale and Donna

 
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