February 19th 2009 12:03 pm
[ Leave A Comment ]

I need you all to sit down, I have some alarming news. Are you sitting? OK. Grandma spanked me last night. You heard me right, grandma spanked me last night. My mom was out gallivanting and I was left in the care of the one person I THOUGHT I could trust, grandma. Well, she left the house for 20 minutes to go pick up my Uncle Dave from bingo. As soon as she left the house I realized that I lost my blue squeaky ball with the paw prints on it. I thought and thought about where it could be. The only thing I could figure is that I must have thrown it away. I went to the 2 trash containers we have in this house and dug to the bottom looking for it, it was not there. When I was done looking I had EVERY intention of putting everything back in the trash cans. Well, grandma walks in and sees the garbage everywhere, I was running up to her to enlist her help in the search for my ball and what does she do???? Assaults me. She got my butt like 3 TIMES, all the while screaming "Who did that???" She immediately felt guilty, as she well should have. She came in the house and cleaned up the mess, I sat by the front door where the beating occurred, just in case I had to make a break for it. She may be crazy enough to come back after me. And I don't care what she says, I was not going after the nachos that she had thrown away earlier, if she tells you that she's a liar!!! It was the ball, I swear!! She said "Isn't that your ball on the floor in the TV room?" I said, "I think you just put it there! It was a ploy to attack a little dog!" Anyways, by the time mom got home I was able to make it up on my chaisse lounge, my injuries are pretty severe so getting up there was no small task. I immediately told on grandma, then I looked at grandma with a little smirk of satisfaction on my face. "Try and beat me now, my mom will kick your ass!!! NOBODY messes with her baby!" And my mom held me and rubbed my little butt and back where grandma had injured me and told me "My poor baby". I think when I went out to go potty mom threatened grandma because when I came back in grandma called me over by her and gave me a good rubbin'. Now I just worry that when mom isn't home to keep that woman in check she may attack me again. I have mom's cell phone number, if I need her to she can be home in less than 5 minutes. Let's just hope I don't have to use it. Gotta go, I'm calling mom's cell phone over and over again just to make sure it's still working. PEACE!!!!!!!!!