Life and Times of My #1 Wiggle Butt Dog!!!

Some of you may have seen this before, it's always good for- a chuckle......

April 18th 2006 10:17 pm
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Some of you may have seen this before, it's always good for a chuckle......



DOG'S DIARY

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!



8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!



9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!



Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!



2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!



3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!



4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!



6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mum! My favorite!



7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!



8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!



9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!



11pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!





CAT'S DIARY

Day 483 of my captivity...



My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.



They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal.



The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the

mild satisfaction that I get from clawing their furniture.



Tomorrow I will eat another houseplant.



Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet

while they were walking almost succeeded - must try this at the top

of the stairs.



In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once

again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. I must remember

to try this on their bed.



Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt

to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear

in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good

little cat I was. Hmmm, that did not work according to plan...



There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed

in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and

smell the food. More importantly, I overheard that my confinement was

due to my powers of inducing "allergies." I must learn what this is

and how I may use it to my advantage.



I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches.

The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is

obviously a half-wit.



The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant and speaks

with them regularly. I am certain he reports my every move. Due to his

current placement in the metal room, his safety is assured.

But I have patience, I can wait, it is only a matter of time...

 
 

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Cory Dec 3,95 to Nov 2 , 05-


 

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