September 24th 2004 9:39 pm
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Hi. I'm glad you're reading my journal entry. I spent a lot of time figuring out how to possess my mom's mind and body so I could use her to type. Keyboards are ruff when you don't have opposable thumbs. Plus I need my nails cut but I'm not telling them that. They'll give me that piece of cheese that makes me all sleepy and then take me to the vet. Bad things happen there. I woke up early today. Mom and Dad were snoring so I went downstairs and raided the garbage can. Got some good stuff- some paper cups and a paper plate. I like napkins a lot too. Especially when they taste like people food. I look out the window a lot. There's a woodchuck that lives outside. My mom and dad call him "Hemingway". I think he's kinda fat. But he's fun to watch as he wobbles around the yards and eats grass. I like grass too. I also like to eat leaves off of trees. Mom said I look like a giraffe when I do that but since I don't know what a giraffe is, I'll just chalk that up to more of her crazy talk. Simon, my buddy, (he's a cat but thinks he's a dog- so shhh! don't tell him) and I decided it was time for a walk so we went and jumped on mom's chest. SHe got all whiny and babbled about how she didn't have to get up yet or something but we didn't give up. Sure enough, 10 minutes later, Simon and I were out in the glorious sunshine, marching down the street. Well...actually when Simon goes out during the day he gets a little freaked by the cars. So he just lays down on the sidewalk. Then Mom grumbles and picks him up, muttering about how cats aren't supposed to weigh 20 lbs. Whatever. After the walk Mom had to go out- she said she was sorry and gave me a cookie, even though she knows I never eat my cookies when I know her or Dad are leaving. So I sat on my chair and gave her my very very best "Saddest Dog On The Planet" look. It didn't work. She still left. But then I raided the garbage again and Simon and I chased Bernadette around the apartment. It was fun. I like being a dog.