Real Boys keep Diawies!

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What r a burfday 'gain?

September 10th 2013 5:10 pm
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I don't 'no wat da heck awe going on... Mommy r baking a big kake which I fot wer hooman fudz. Bud appewently I r wong... It has PEANUT BUDDER in it!
I r nod saying dat I don't wike birfdays it r just dat I don't 'no wud dey are! *walks to a bookshelf* Where are dat dicshionairy fing wiff all dem wordses? Oh, heer it is. Okay, B... Banana, Bark, Birfday! Heer it r! Hmmm...

"MOMMY! WUT DUZ DIS SAY?! I NEBER WEELY TOT DIS TWU 'NUFF! I CANNOD REED!"

"Pass it heer Birthday Boy... Birthday... It means a special celebration just for you on the day you were born!

"Hmm... I wemember dat day! Snuggled wiff my 5 sibwings blind 'an deff wiff only our beegul noses to sniff our way 'wound! Is dis teh wite day?

"Yes, thats why all your Dogster friends sent you gifts and you got all those phone calls and the free treat at Petsmart... Makes sense now?

"Ohhhhh riight, now I ged dis! So it r wike a celebwashun ob da one an onwy, cyoot widdle me?

"Yeah!"

"Yes! I command yu gwill me sum MEATZ™!"

"Sigh, Alright since its your birthday but no other day! Don't go around thinking that your gonna eat like this everyday!"

"WHAT?! Awww, cwap!"

"I hab wun questshun 'do."

"Yes Snoop?"

"Why awen't I... Wun,Too,Fwee,Four,Fibe,Sicks,Seben,Ate,Nayne,Ten,Eweben... Tweb monfs old?

"Because instead of saying Twelve months you can say 1 year.

"AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! I ARE A YEAR OLD! WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

Gotta go pupses!

Hugs 'an licks,

Da Birfday Guy

 

I r Back fwum Camping! Aroooooooooooooo!

August 9th 2013 12:28 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 2 people already have ]

Hi pupses! As yu all 'no, I went camping fur a wong time! It r wike wiving in a dog park! In camping I sadwy sawed no bearses... or Saskuacheses but I did mistake a bear fur my doggy fwend Midnight teh Staffie! Da weasin I was talking 'bout Saskuacheses wur becuz teh name ob ower campsite r called
Saskuach Pwobinshul Park! Peopleses say dat wer we were staying iz were Saskuach has been spotted teh most in teh world (teh camp wer in Chilliwack, BC) I swam in teh wake, wolled in teh mud 'an dirtied my widdle self up! Wen we got home I wuz hot, tyurd and dirty! In camp I was wiving teh dweam! Mommy went wid all teh church camping 'an I wud go campsite tu campsite begging fur fudz fwom teh other campers! I eben swept in mai bewy own tent! Tuday Mommy r taking me tu Pedsmart tu ged a 'nu weash 'cuz I bwoke dem all in camp! (I r still a gud off-weash pup but I wuv tu sniff ebewyfing on our walks so I ged way behind Mommy in teh walks sometimes!) "Beagles." Mommy sed why oh why did I get a BEAGLE! Even the breeder warned me about the breed!" Mommy wed in a book dat some Beaguls r TOO smart 'an yus der bwains tu outsmart der owner... Yep, dat sounds wike me BOL! Well got tu go! Mommy r geding hur keyses 'an I need tu hop on mai fwont-seat befur Mommy puts me in teh back! Hopefully I ged a nice Busy Bone™ fur beying a gud dog!

PS: Tummorow I turn 11 MONFS! Wow I r old! Now yu can weely call me Mr. Beagul 'cuz Mommy sez I wuz tu yung 'fore bud tummorow I r gonna be Mr. Beagul!

Wuv 'an stuffs,

Snoopy... I meen Mr.Beagle!

 

I ain't nuffin' but a Beagul! And dats twu!

July 24th 2013 10:10 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 3 people already have ]

♫ I ain't nuffin' but a Beagle
Bwitzin' all the time.
I ain't nuffin' but a fur ball
sheddin' all teh time.
Well I gave yu wickes 'an hugses
cause you are a fwend ob mine.

Well Mom sez dat I'm annoyin'
dats a stoopid lie.
Well she sez dat I wuv howlin'
dats the weason why
shee mayde mee howl outside
cause Mom ain't no fwend ob mine (just kidding Momma!)

arf arf arf arf arf arf arf

I ain't nuffin' but a Beagul
Pwancin' all teh time.
I ain't nuffin' but a kyooty
Bein' kyoot all teh time. (Except fur Satuwday, dat r my wazy day!)
And I r a widdle Beagul so yu r a fwend ob mineeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!♫
Arooooo!

 

OMD Mommy! OMD! Dat waz me?

July 23rd 2013 10:23 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 4 people already have ]

Mommy waz making a foto album ob me 'an Snow... as puppys! Momma sez Snow wooks wike he hasn't eben bwoken a pwate wiff his inosent face 'an stuffs. Den da picfurs ob ME. I saw a widdle Beagle dat wooked just wike me... if I wur six pounds 'an wur teefing! I hope Mommy will be aybul tu put da picturs on Dogster sune so ebery doggy on earf can see me 'an Snow as small as mousies! (In my upinyon Snow wooked wike a white wat.) .... Wait... nebermind! Mommy don't put picturs ob me as a twicolored mouse on Dogster! How embawassing I r a gwown boy! Wook at mee now I r 27 pounds an 38 cm long! Dat's it fur tuday ob mai stowies 'an 'bout my life 'an stuffs.
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Snoopy's tip ob teh day: NEBER, wet yur Mommy put EMBAWASSING picturs ob yu fur teh whole doggy wurld tu see! 'An if yu go camping, neber appwoach a bear... Momma sez dey r dangewus but I want tu meet wun wen I go camping dis weekend!

PS: I r gowing CAMPING!!! I will be chasing skwerles all day long, waching Dadda gwill sum fudz, maybee find a BEAR, go tu da lake fur a swim... 'An a bote wide! Pwus Mommy's cuzins r coming 'an r bwinging der 'nu puppy Wex a Labernard mix! Oh, 'an we ged tu sweep in a T-E-N-T! Sounds wike fun! I r in! Also if yu don't see me on Dogstur fur 3 days. Wemain Calm! Don't start a surch 'an wescue party wooking fur me! I r fine!

 

BBQ!

July 21st 2013 1:40 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 1 person already has ]

Aftur naping on teh patio chare. I smell sumfing unmistakubul! The 'licious essence ob... MEATZ™! Mommy's grill'in on teh Magic MEATZ Mashine™ Dat's it. No more Mr. Lazy Beagul! I spwing off my chare wike a wocket ship and stand up tu catch a bedur whiff ob teh big juicy hunk ob beef! Today r teh best day eber! If 10 000 skwerlses pop out 'an led me chase 'em den tuday wud be teh test bestest day eber! I hab been gowing tu teh dog park ebewy day to meet nyew doggy pals! It r also an "In an oben Day" tuday becuz my fur is on fire! Ha, I geded yu gud so don't start geding yur fire ekstingoowisherer fing out! Hab a gweat day pupses and enjoy yur summer!


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*Snoopy's tip ob teh day*: Make teh most yu can ob eating steak! Imagine wife wiffout cows 'an chiggens! Now unimajin dat 'an pig out on MEATZ™ Wemebur tu fank teh cowses fur how 'licious dey r!

PS: I r sawry fur mayking all yu pupses jewus about teh BBQ!

Steak-bweathed licks,

Snoopy

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It's SATURDAY!!!!!!!!!!

July 20th 2013 2:31 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 3 people already have ]

"Snoopy wake up!"

"Zzzzzz..."

"Snoo-py, your awake... kind of."

"I r nod awake"

"Snoopy, every other day you wake up right away for food and stuff.

"I don't weely care 'bout fudz tuday... IT'S SATURDAY!!!

"Alright then, so you wouldn't care if there's an all you can eat, fancy doggy buffet in the kitchen and that big neighborhood Sheepdog is pigging out on the meat.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT!!!" DAT GUY IS SUCH A SWOB!" HE CAN'T EBEN EAT WIFFOUT GEDING FUDZ ALL OBER HIS DOGGY BEERD! DAT'S IT!! I R COMING DOWN TO HOG ALL TEH FUD!"

"Snoopy, I wouldn't do that... It's a fancy dog-"

"I DON'T CARE!!! I'M GOING DOWN THERE!"

*STOMP* *STOMP* *STOMP*

"OMD!! Dis was all a twick! Just tu wake me up! I r going back tu bed!

"Cwap, I cannod go back tu sweep no madder how hard I twy! Dis always happens wen I wake up erly!

"My checkwist was almost dun beeying checkd! Heer it iz:

SWEEP IN!------------ Woke up tu erly...

WEAR MAI SATURDAY JAMMIES-------- Wer in teh wash... I was nekkid!

EAT BWEAKFUST AT WUNCH---------- Eated a helping full ob kibble in teh morning... I wuz hoping fur sum gud bacon...

*Snoopy's Tip* NEBER listen tu teh doggy buffet twicks!

 

I R BACK! AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

July 5th 2013 8:51 pm
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Hewo pupses! I r back aftur nod beeying on dogsta fur a weeeeeeeeeeely 'lon
time! WOW! I r weely naine monfs?! Alweddy? Momma... are yu sure?
"Yes Snoopy, you were born September 10th." Owe... Wite, wite. Well, I r nod dat bigger except for my snozzer ( noze) which seems to be weely huge and it works weel good!! Well, wen I wuz not on dogsta somfing HORRIBLE happened... Heers teh story:

It al startid wen Momma waz on teh phone dis is wats she sedz...

"Hello, yes I'm phoning to make an appointment for my dog."

"Snoopy... He's nine months, a Beagle. You might have seen him when he was only 8 weeks and a pup."

"Yes he was the Beagle pup howling and screaming when he got his shots."

"I would like to get him neutered, tattooed and his dewclaw removed. Oh, and can you give him a nail trim?

"Friday sounds good. Thank you so much, Snoopy will be eager to see you!" (Yeah wite!)

Teh next thing you know I come home Friday with dis Stoopid, widikoolus cone, a tatoo in my cyoot, velviddy soft beagley ears, a hoomungus, stoopid bandage, stiches on a pwace were stiches shood NEBER be 'an my nails twimmed and cut.

"Ay, ay, ay Mommy! Dis iz not funny!" I sez as she waffs 'an taked pictfurs ob me.

" Calm down! Be a man Snoopy! It's only for ten days. Oh, and it says here on this Vet note that you can't run,jump, go down the stairs and go out for walks.

"WHAT?! MOOOOOOM! I LIBE BY JUMPI'N, RUNNI'N, GOING DOWN TEH STERZ 'AN GOI'N OUT FOR WAWKS WID YU! EXSEPT FUR DAT TIME WEN DA LAB FOLOW MEE 'AN YU HOME!

Well, I didz get dat cone on and bandid and Momma sez dat the stiches on teh pwace were stiches are neber supozed tu be are "Dizolbing" wich is a wong werd dat I don't unnerstand.

Godda go, I smellz Bar-Bee-Ku somwer... I finks dat Dadda iz cooking some MEATZ™. Dem r calling me wid der meat moufs. "Snoooopy, come and stuff your long Beagul snout into our meaty juicy deliciousness. Go on, Snoooooooopeee!" I wisten tu dem and jumo up teh table were Dadda is gwilling on da Magical MEATZ™ Masheen "SNOOPY! NOOOOOOO!" I gez da temptashion iz too much tu ber.

Meaty-bweathed Beagul wickes,

Snoopy &hearts:

 

A Day at teh Park!

April 13th 2013 1:50 pm
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Mommy: Snoopy! Are you ready to go to the park?

Snoopy: Justs a sekond... * CRASH!* *BANG!*

Mommy: Snoopy honey, whats with the backpack?

Snoopy: It r my survivul backpack, ifs wee get wost in teh wildurness!

Mommy: Snoop, the park is in the middle of the city not in the middle of the wilderness. Why don't you leave the bag?

Snoopy: Whatevur! Yu'll see! Wen we get wost and hungry I r not shawing my survivul stuffs wid yu!

Mommy: Just get in the car Mr. Beagle.

Snoopy: Yay! Can I wide shotgun?

Mommy: Be my guest.

Snoopy: Can I dwive?

Mommy: WHAT?!?

Snoopy: I r justs kidding!

Mommy: I hope you were!

___________________AT THE PARK_________________________________________

Mommy: Snoopy don't pull on the leash! Wait for me!

Snoopy: Hey! It r nod my falt yu r gowing teh wong way!

Mommy: What are you talking about the dogpark is this way! You were going to the HUMAN park!

Snoopy: Duh! Yu see, I r tiyerd ob going tu dat pwace wid dwooling dogs 'an stuffs!

Mommy: Last time we went you were the one who was drooling like crazy!

Snoopy: Dat was teh old Snoopy! I r nod inerested in dwooling 'an dog parks. Tu teh monkey bars!

Mommy: Yeesh Snoopy... you are one cray-zee hound! ... Snoopy? Where are you? SNOOPY!

Snoopy: ¡uo ǝɯɔ ¡sıp ʎʍʇ pnɥs nʎ ¡unɟ oooos ɹ sıp ¡sɹɐq ʎǝʞuoɯ ɥǝʇ uo ¡ɹǝǝɥ ɹǝqo ¡ʎɯɯoɯ

Mommy: SNOOPY! Oh my gosh! I'll save you! Snoopy! Hold on!

Snoopy:¡oooɥ ooʍ ¡ʞɹɐd ƃop pןo ʇɐp uǝp unɟ ǝɹoɯ ʎɐɐɐɐʍ ɹ sıp ¡sıp ʇɐ pnƃ sɐʍ ı nʎ pןoʇ ¡sɥɔnɯ ooʇ ʎɹɹǝʍ nʎ ˙˙˙ʎɯɯoɯ ɥo

Mommy: Phew! I never knew you could do that!

Snoopy: ¡ʎuɐdɯoɔ ƃuıʞɐɯ ʇɐǝʍʇ uʍo ıɐɯ uʍo ı ʍoɥ ǝʞıʍ ¡ǝɯ ʇnoq, ou, ʇuop nʎ sɟɟnʇs qo sʇoʍ ɹ ɹǝp

Mommy: What! Ok as soon as we get home tell me everything about you!

Snoopy: ¡ǝןıʍ ɐ ǝʞɐʇ ɐuuoƃ sʇɐp ןןǝʍ

Mommy: Geez, I never get a normal dog... first a naughty fluff ball and now a company owning Beagle!

Snoopy: ¡sʇsǝɹǝuı uɐ, sʎqoɥ ɹǝʍo qɐɥ sǝsdnd ǝǝʍ ¡ʎǝɥ

Mommy: Can you get down? I can't hear you good when your talking upside down

Snoopy: ¡uʍop ʎɐʍ ɐ puıɟ ǝɯ pǝl

Mommy: Are you sure about this Snoop? Do you need help?

Snoopy: ¡ǝuıɟ ɹ ı ¡ou

Mommy: Snoopy! Your grip is getting loose

Snoopy: It is? * Falls Down* AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!

Mommy: I gotcha!

Snoopy: Fanks Mommy... I guess yu were wite, I r bedur wid teh dogpark!

Mommy: NOW YOU TELL ME!

Snoopy & Mommy: HA HA HA HA HA! BOL!

_________________________THE END!_____________________________________

Hey pupses! It r mee, Snoopy! Yu wanna know how tu type upside down? Justs go tu dis link: Write upside down in forums!

♥ ʎdoous


'ǝʌoן

 

Mr. Hound, my nu best fwend!

April 12th 2013 4:48 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 2 people already have ]

I hab a best fwend. He r kinda teh silent type but he r still cool! He dont mind if yu chew his eers or pul his tael. He r a cute widdle beagul too. He r... Mr. Hound! Der r somfing yu need 'no 'bout him do, he r a PILLOW PET! He r nod eben MY pillow pet... he r Mommy's! Wen mom came into hur woom she fownd mee 'an Mr. Hound snuggled up tugeder. Shee almos tot dat she had 2 beaguls! We bof wike tu play 'an I take him wevevur I go! Mommy sayd dat we wur insepuruble- wutevur dat means! Oopsie! Gotta go! Mr. Hound r calling!

 

FANK YU DOGSTER! WOW, I R DOGGY OB TEH DAY!

April 10th 2013 3:07 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 1 person already has ]

Mommy was soooo surpwised tu see my face on teh cummuniddy page! I justs wanna fank all ob mai fwends for the diawy congwatuwation and gifts!

Zaidie, for teh twophy!

Hershey for teh congwatuwations!

Max for teh fun widdle baysball dat I played fur owers wid!

Cooper fur dat pawesome pic!

Fwicka fur dat congwatuwashuns comment!

All ob Dogster

My day was weely speshul fanks tu all ob yu pupses!


Love,


Mr. Beegul (:

 
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