Real Boys keep Diawies!

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Updates on My Diawy

January 4th 2013 7:37 pm
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Well, Mommy has'nt been ipdatin my diawy in a loooooong time so ter iz a lots tu tell 'bout so I just wanna wite about my week:

Well, first ob all Mommy buys me a new puppy pen for wen she r nod in teh house for mee to stay in teh kichin so she I won't be bugg'in Snow all day (hmmf!) At first I wuz twying to push it downs but I soon been realizing that I could'nt. Ten, I desided to use my big Beagle howl tu convince Mommy tu let mee out. AROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! Mommy just jumped up, first she wuz think'in it wuz teh neiberz Beagle cuz he likes to howl but ten she realized that it was, ME!!!! She almost did'nt beleev herself that it was me but she HAD to cuz I NEEDED the atentcion. Mommy soon got tired of my howlz, and cwying, so she gotz mee a Nylabone!!! Yipeee!!! I sune started to chew it and then, Snow just came up and snatched it froms mee!!! HOW DARES HIM!!! I walked up to he and I politly ask for its back and he said, No, It's Paybacl time from when you stole my bone!" I almost did'nt 'ember 'bout it till I red hiz dogster diawy. Ten I said, "Dos it wook like I cares 'bout tat?? Huh, dos it???" Snow snapped at me and growled. He tinks I r a scaredy puppy, but I'M not scard of HIM!!!! I just snatch it and runs away. Well, Anyways now I r gett'in used to them old fence and I been realizing tat it is actually wors for Snow at the oder end cause he can't get to taste an'smell teh food from acwos it!

Second ob all, I got a nyew sweater!! I wook soo handsom in it!

Tird ob all I started puppy class! Won day Mommy took mee to Petsmart an' I met a bunch ob puppies and one dog! Ter names were Romeo, who wuz a pug puppy who wuz my age. An,anoder puppy huz wuz an Aussie Shepherd/ Lionberger crossbred (at weast tats wut her Mommy tinks.) And a Shih-Tzu, whu wuz 2 yearz old. First we lurned "Watch Me," and then we learned how tu do "Down it wuz weely fun!

 

NYEW STUFFS!!!!

January 23rd 2013 8:18 pm
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Weeeeellllllll, Mommy came bak fwom Bellingham (wer I wuz borned) and came bak wit som tags 'an a nyew collar and oder stuffs! Boy wuz I habby 'bout tat! She got mee dis nyew big food bowl 'an som tags wit mai name 'an fone number on it. She also got mee a nyew coller 'cause my old wone iz gedding tu tight now tat I r gwowing. Snow iz super jelus ob me 'an he twies tu eat out ob mai food bowl 'an tak off mai collar! I just bark ad him and pull his tael!! I hobe yu hab a gud day,




Snoopy (;

 

I gwaduated!!!

February 2nd 2013 7:04 pm
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Well, tuday wuz teh big day at puppy school becuz, we gwaduated!!! I wuz sooper exsited and wee gotz to wear wittle hats 'an stuffs. Mom got a nyew camewa so she took picturs ob me 'an my puppy pals. Mom sayz tat I r geding biger. Tuday I also lost a toof 'an it HURTS!!! 'An awso eberyday Mom needs tu loosen mai coller becuz I r geding a big neck. Snow wuz weely jewus ob me but ten I told him tat I went to skool 'an then he sayd 'nebermind, I HATE SCHOOL" Mom baked kookeys 'an dey were delishus!! Dey wer wibbon shaped 'an she gave some tu Max our fwend.


Much Gwadated Hugs,


Snoopy the Graduwation Guy

 

Teh Kitty Wisperur

March 6th 2013 7:33 pm
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In teh nite wen Mommy went tu go take mee out tu potty 'an poop. ( HEY!Dats twu, eberypupses doo tat!) Wel, Anywayz I beegan tu howl like cwazee AUUUUUUUUU AUUUUUUUUUUUU! Mommy taut I wuz face tu face wid a waccoon or somfing scawy but it wuz eben werser! Wite were I was, I wuz face-to-face wid a kitty!!! My werst enimy! 'An dat wuz'nt JUST any ordinawy kitty, NO! It wuz Sugar... Teh wurlds meenest, most bosyest kitty in teh WHOLE UNIBERSE! Tat kitty just meeowed at mee 'an I knew tat tey ment somfin nod nice. But I r bilingual cuz I know a wittle bit ob kitty 'an I knew she wuz saying bad fings about mee! Mew,Meow,Hissssssssssss transwated to "Hey furball! Nice to see ya! I cannot believe I can stand seeing such filthy creatures such as dogs! We kitties like to stay clean," shee sayd as she licked hur paws. Dis made mee angwy... But why howl wen I cud speek kitty?! MEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!!!!!! I dided my bestest kitty noise eber and dat skared off dat wittle kitty. Teh Kitty Wisperur (ME) had speeken kitty! Wut I just sed meens
" Kitty back off... Don't yu make mee send in my teef wich I just gwew!" Dat cat wan away wid hur tale under hur legs!

Love,

Kitty Wispurur 'an Bilingual fwend,


Snoopy

 

Bad day at "Snoopy's Animal Tweats™

March 20th 2013 5:11 pm
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I hab deesidid tu start my own biznes making tweat fur any animalz. Tuday I got a fone call fwom my big office.

_______________________ YESTERDAY_____________________________________

Me: Hey has anybudy seen my lunch?

Worker: No boss.

Me: Hab yu shipped teh tweats yet?


Worker: Yes Snoopy.


Me: It r Mr. Snoopy tu yu!


Worker: Yes sir, one of the treats smelled a lot like meat.


Me: Did yu say MEAT?! *Licks Lips*


Worker: Well yeah!


Me: I r soooo tiyerd but I can't sweep cuz we hab tu werk all day.
Maybe just wun wittle nap won't hurt at all! * Sleeps on office chair.*

_______________________ TUDAY__________________________________________

* RING

Me: Zzzzz... HUH!? Hello! Snoopy's Animal Tweats™! Hu r dis?


Angry Kitty: MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOOOOOOW!


Me: AAAH! Wut iz it? Yu didn't wike Snoopy's Kitty Cwunchies™?


Kitty: NO! Thanks to your lazy butt I got the WRONG ONES! I ended up getting a big hunk of beef in them and I HATE BEEF!


Me: Beef?! * Licks Lips* How cud yu hate a jucy hunk ob meat? Oops, I fink dat wuz my lunch. No wondur I wuz wooking fur it!


Angry Kitty: EWWW! Anyways, I am NO LONGER GETTING YOUR YUCKY BEEF!

Me: WHAAAAAAAAAT!? Gib mee anudur chance pwease! I pwomise I will gib you Snoopy's Kitty Cwunchies™ EBERYDAY FUR TEH WEST OB MY LIFE!

Angry Kitty: BTW My Mommy owns a PYTHON and he isn't too happy about Snoopy's Snakey Wakey Flaky Bits™

Me: .... Sawy, did yu say SNAKE!!!??


Angry Kitty: Oh sure! But Scaly here won't hurt you... He'll just strangle you till you choke.


Me: ........... AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! I R WEEEEEEEELY SAWY!! PWEAAASE FURGIVE ME!!!! PWEEEEEEEEEASE! I R SAWY FUR BEING WAZY!


Angry Kitty: Serves yu right!

Me: AUUUUUUUUUU! I DON'T WANNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Angry Kitty: I was just messing with you! But the snake is angry! BTW remember your promise on the lifetime supply!

Me: GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!

*Hangs up*


Sigh, I gess I shouldn't hab been lazy ):

 

I r teh Eastur Beagle!

March 26th 2013 12:38 pm
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Easter r comin up 'an yu 'no what? Tat ol Easter bunny is retiring so I r taking ober his job! Wite now I r painting chocklit eggs 'an all dat eastury stuffs. I r gonna dewivur all kinds ob goodies fur eberywon on earf! 'An ged dis doggies, since we can't hab chocklit I made yu all eggs 'an bunnies made ob carob a chocklit substitoot dat is dog safe. HOPPY EASTER! See yu all soon!


- Teh Eastur Beagle

 

Hoppy Eastur!

March 31st 2013 12:44 am
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I r weely bizzy wite now so I got tu make dis diawy entwy quick! Happy Easur evryfur! I r on my way delivering easter eggs 'an baskets ob MEATZ! Wen Mommy was taking mee out I snuck out wid mai baskets 'an wan as fast as eber! Some kitties began to hiss at me wen I gave dem baskets. I yelled, " Take dem, dey r fishy tweats!" But dey still ignored me ( Well, more fur mee!) I r making sure tu give bery speshul tweats fur all the doggies fwon dogster! Well, Got tu go! I need tu finish hiding the eggs!

Easter Licks

 

Breakfust Theif

April 6th 2013 1:06 pm
[ Leave A Comment | 5 people already have ]

I wake up in teh morning 'an see Mommy toasting bwead. She takes it out ob teh tostur 'an lets it out tu cool. Now iz my opurtunity tu twy a piece ob toast! I snatch it of teh countur 'an eet it in wun bite! Mommy shud weely watch hur food wid me awound...

Toast-Breath Licks,

Snoopy ( Mr. Beagul)

 

FANK YU DOGSTER! WOW, I R DOGGY OB TEH DAY!

April 10th 2013 3:07 pm
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Mommy was soooo surpwised tu see my face on teh cummuniddy page! I justs wanna fank all ob mai fwends for the diawy congwatuwation and gifts!

Zaidie, for teh twophy!

Hershey for teh congwatuwations!

Max for teh fun widdle baysball dat I played fur owers wid!

Cooper fur dat pawesome pic!

Fwicka fur dat congwatuwashuns comment!

All ob Dogster

My day was weely speshul fanks tu all ob yu pupses!


Love,


Mr. Beegul (:

 

Mr. Hound, my nu best fwend!

April 12th 2013 4:48 pm
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I hab a best fwend. He r kinda teh silent type but he r still cool! He dont mind if yu chew his eers or pul his tael. He r a cute widdle beagul too. He r... Mr. Hound! Der r somfing yu need 'no 'bout him do, he r a PILLOW PET! He r nod eben MY pillow pet... he r Mommy's! Wen mom came into hur woom she fownd mee 'an Mr. Hound snuggled up tugeder. Shee almos tot dat she had 2 beaguls! We bof wike tu play 'an I take him wevevur I go! Mommy sayd dat we wur insepuruble- wutevur dat means! Oopsie! Gotta go! Mr. Hound r calling!

 
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Snoopy, Mistur Beegul


 

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