May 31st 2009 6:57 pm
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Yesterday I looked death in the eye. It's true, I did. I akchualee looked it in both eyes and then tried to bite it, and Mummy said that was a really FOOLISH thing to do. She used some other words in between there too but I don't think I should write them in here.
Anywho, here's the story. Mummy took me outside really early to do my morning peepee. There was a lady outside walking a LARGE, LARGE Rottweiler. Mummy said it looked kind of like one of those dogs that Satan would have sitting by his side or something. I don't know what that means. So anyway, the lady comes walking slowly up to us and stops. Her dog is standing very still beside her. I am semi-still (I don't think I ever stand completely still, you know), and we are standing across from her in the grass. Mummy said she thot the dog looked really scary, but then felt bad because maybe he wasn't a-scary at all, just big. "Is your dog friendly?" Mummy asked. "Well, sometimes," said the lady, "Is your dog male? Sometimes he has problums with other males." I didn't say anything. I was just watching. Mummy shook her head and said, "Mmmm, I don't know, sometimes other dogs don't like Milo either because of his high energee." But the lady decididid to come over anyway, and inched her big, scary, Satan's pal Rottweiler over to us. And that's when I decididid to start growling and jumping at his face. I don't know what came over me, truly. I just didn't like the way he was looking at me, like he thot he was bigger and better than me, like he was so tuff. I could show HIM who was boss! Well things quickly gots outs of control and before I could say OOPS BAD DECISHUN, the Satan's Rottweiler let out this grrrrRRRRROOOAAAARRRRrrrr and lunged back at ME and Mummy yanked my leash so hard I thot my head was a-gonna fall off. But Satan's helper was so large that his owner couldn't stop him and he just kept a-coming and Mummy kept a-pulling me in circles but that dog's big head was just so close to my little body. Finally the owner got her dog under control by sitting on him and then she startid talking to him in German or something and we just kind of crept away. I hate to say this but I really a-scared Mummy that time. She said she thot I was going to die. She said the grass was wet and she almost fell and she would not have been able to get that dog off of me. She said I was FOOLISH and DUMB and SILLY for going after a Rottweiler, espeeshulee one that was three times my size. She said I could have akchualee walked under him, that's how much bigger he was than me. She said that inside she felt like letting out a high-pitched screem like a little girl when that dog came after me, but knew it would make the matter worse. She said her hands were a-trembling and her heart was pounding. She said she was not ready to have me killed during a morning peepee. What a sad way to go! I am sorry I made my Mummy so frightened. I am sorry I took years off her life, gave her more gray hairs, and made her say all those bad words to me as we walked away from the scene. I take full responsibilitee for my akshuns and I will try very hard not to go after any helpers of Satan ever again. Espeshulee ones that understand German.
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Aww, crap!!! Meeting eye to eye with a Rottie from hell!!? OMG! Milo, you coulda been a Rottie snack while you were making peepee!!! Not a good way to go, that's fer sher!
You know, I've done almost the same thing to some big dogs (last time it was a St. Bernard) at the doggie park. They come around to smell me and sometimes I'm not in the mood to be smelled so I start talking trash to them. Mom comes over to me (she makes sure she's always near me) and points her big ol' finger at me telling me that I better act right or I'm going to be put back in the car. I know when I'm in trouble, and I do enjoy the doggie park (we don't go that often anymore) so I just bite the bullet and walk away (with mom right behind me telling me off). Usually I act right, though.
Must be a Jack Russell thing.
Oh yeah - we're so glad your head didn't fall off 'cause then we wouldn't be reading anymore exciting Milo adventures!
~Jack Russel Terriers-greatest and smartest dogs on earth!~
Love you, King Milo!
Sheesh! My mom doesn't even know how to spell Russell - how embarrassing!!
I fink dat da lady wif Satan's mean doggie shoulda knowed bedder than to let him near such a sweet, gentle pup like youself. It not ALL your faly, Milo!!
I wuv dat pichur of you smiling in your sleep. Cute!!! BOL!
"It not ALL your fault" is whut I wanted say. OMD I so 'barrassed.
It wuzn't yur fault Milo....dat big dawg didn't now hiz pwace, yu hadz to show him. Sher am gwad yu weren't his snak dough!
At leest YOU all understand!! I haven't heard the end of it from Mummy! "This is the spot where you were almost killed, Milo," blah blah blah...I had a REP to protekt, you know!!
Milo, you have what our mom calls... "the little dog syndrome"... where in we are big dogs trapped into little dogs bodies. We think we have to prove how big we are and that often gets us into trouble. We're so happy that the big rotti didn't get you....
You're right, Charley! Mummy always says I have no idea how small I am! Ha!