... And now a word or more from Mommie

Maya,

(a/k/a Puppa, Zen Dog, Diva D0g, Chunky Monkey, Pupity Pup Pup, Speed Bump, The Sphinx Baby Baby and so many more…)

I'm missing you so much! Who will I sing my Good Morning Song to? By the way, thanks for putting up with my singing, my cuddles and constant chatting with you.

You, little girl saved AND were my life! You're the personification of love and I would have done anything for you (except watch you suffer any more) – because it really was All About You!! I can't believe you passed so soon, I thought we would have more time together.

Everyone loved you and how pleased were they when you decided to acknowledge their presence & let you steal their seat at the park. You were my Queen KaMayaMaya, my little diva and princess. Thanks for riding shotgun with me and forcing me out of my shell to meet people – our time at the dog park or just walking local parks brought a smile to my face and everyone that you came upon. I would watch your lips peeled back in glee, too – even though you pretended you didn't want to walk at the park.

Thank you for being my little girl and in my life these 5 years - I will love you always.

Mommie

My last diary entry (from planet earth)

My mommie is writing this since I'm in heaven now looking after her. I passed last Saturday, 4/25/09. It seems that I had a very fast acting form of leukemia.

Not only are bullies stoic, never hear a beep out of us if we're not feeling well, but with leukemia it only shows up if something else happened to come along. I caught a UTI and doctor's kept an eye on me becuase some of my blood numbers were not coming down.

I have to say the night before I passed, mommie took me to the dog park (we hadn't been there in 3-4 weeks due to my health) and mommie and I got lots of hugs, luv and support from our friends we would see there rain or shine for the past 4 years.

I perked up when I saw Auntie Mei Ling and I tried to jump all over her, and I only do it to her. She came up on a fluke since she only had 20 minutes to run up there. Wow we were all glad she did. It was such a wonderful memory for mommie and me to keep.

Now that I am an angel (although momie and friends always called me one), well now that I'm an angel, I'll be looking over all of you giving you love and support from above.

xoxo
Maya

I got's tagged...

I was tagged by my friends Izzy & Bob while my mom was on vacation! Because my typing skills are not my strong point -- I had to wait 'til she got back! :0p Thanks Izzy & Bob for letting me plag tag with you both!

The rules of the game are as follows:

Each player will list 7 random facts about him/herself. Dogs who are tagged need to post in their diary The Rules and their 7 Pawsome Facts. They then choose 7 other dogs to tag and list their names. Don’t forget to bark them a pmail that they’ve been tagged and to read your diary for the info!
--------------------------------
7 Pawsome Facts

1) I belive I am a human - I just happen to like to walk on all fours.

2) I ABSOLUTELY LOVE EVERYONE -- especially little children -- I'm so gentle too!

3) Can anyone say DIVA?!? It IS all about me!

4) My favorite thing to do is to sit on my mommy's bed and look out the window to see what is going on in the apartment complex. Mommy moved the bed just so I can see out (did I say it was all about me, I wasn't kidding)

5) Switcheroo - I rather hang out with people at the dog park, mommy plays with all the doggies! It's a nice arrangement

6) I suck on Mr. Pather (stuffed animal) like a pacifier - he's my wubbie.

7) People know when I really like them, because I go after their toes and ankles when they try to walk. Some people at the dog park are disappointed I don't do it, mom is grateful. They scream with glee when I decide they are my favorite until I take a chop on their toe (ha ha ha) but they still think it's cute. My one friend Mike pretends he's in Riverdance they way I go after his toes/ankles.

I am TAGGING:
-BabyGirl
-Quincy
-Cooper
-The Fantatic 4
-Cupcake
-Izzabella
-Zoey

I think my doggie au pair is a spy...

Dear Diary,
I am not sure if this week-long 90 degree heat is getting to me but I am beginning to think my Doggie Au Pair is a spy!

I gotta admit; I was really looking forward to having a doggie au pair come walk me every afternoon like clockwork while mommy is at work. Carolyn, that is the spy's name, is wonderful, cheerful (almost too cheerful) AND she gives my mom a full update on a piece of cute paper every day.

BINGO! What is that all about?

I thought, ...well I will really give her something to report to my mom about. I would show her how cute (or not) I could be! Oh yeah, I broke out all my best Diva moves, you know the ones I'm talking about:

- Rolling in the grass endlessly (She thinks it cute - I made myself dizzy)

- Taking forever to smell a blade of grass (Patience of a Zen monk - my nose is scratched up a bit)

- Heading back up the stairs after a quick potty break (Carolyn understands, it's hot out - I ended up home alone, she would have stayed 15 more minutes)

- Refusing to poop (Backfired on me or should I say I was the only one "impacted" by this maneuver [pun intended] - I was pretty uncomfortable until mommy got home)

She is the real deal! Carolyn is not a spy, she just gives my mommy little updates so she doesn't worry about me (one less thing to talk about in therapy, I guess). I love Carolyn, she has personality plus and is yet another person that puts up with my (at times) spoiled behavior!

Note to self.... Grow up and don't be such a brat!

It Really Is A Dog's Life... (No really!)

You are Invited to a Puppy Party

Please help Maya celebrate getting her mom out of the house & back to work!

When: Monday, May 15, 2006
Time: 6:50am - 5:30pm
Place: Maya's
Theme: Risky Business - Running Around In Our Doggie Underoos

Kibble, free-range chicken, meatballs from antipastos, bottled water w/ice cubes & bully sticks will be provided.

----------------------------------------------- ------------------------------------------
Dude's.... we have to celebrate this one!

I thought the woman would never leave the house again. There is a reason for the phrase '...it's a dog's life.' and not '...it's a dog & their owner's life.' Man, my mommy disrupted my entire daily routine.

Get this! One day in the middle of the worst rainstorm, she decided to drive to a woman's shelter in San Bruno and donate women's professional clothes to less fortunate women entering the work force. Guess who rode shotgun? Al Roker would not have gone out in weather like that, gees!

I gotta say - I was starting to get scared that she donated all of her work clothes. Things were getting pretty ugly... For the past three months she has lived in her sweats and jammies. Makeup? What's that?!? Freaking scary, man! She would go out like that too, thinking that by putting on a baseball cap it made it all right.

The worst week of these 3 months was in February. She switched my station 96.5 to her's 97.7 - KFOG. The station had a Mardi Gras Music Celebration for an entire week leading up to Fat Tuesday. Nothing but Zydecco and Bayou music going 24x7 for the week. Picture this, continual rain outside, the apartment looked like a swamp on the inside, mom had some frizzy voodoo hair-thing going on and was looking for some CD's from a guy named Buckwheat Zydecco to add to her collection of music.

I almost had to call her friend Carmen or fly her sister Sheila in from North Carolina for an intervention. Thank God, she went to Hawaii on vacation a few weeks later, she needed to get some perspective. But if I have to hear Dave Matthews Band sing Dream Girl one more time... Forget Dream Girl, I am going to turn into my mommy's worst nightmare.

Oh yeah, I was one doggie on the edge!

Life is good now! My life is about to get back to normal...

Mom will be out of the house by quarter to 7am each day. I get to sleep-in, listen to my radio station and rock out to Los Lonely Boys, munch on some kibble, take another nap and then go to the dog park when mom gets home.

Oh yeah, this dog's life just got better.

What's In A Name? Or Should I Say Nickname?

Good morning, doc. Mind if I lay on the sofa for today's session? You know how I do love lounging on a good leather sofa even if it is at the doggie therapist's office.

How am I feeling? Well... I'm really struggling with all these nicknames my mom chooses to call me. To top it all off, she will call me these "cute" names at the dog park, in front of my dog park peeps (my pack) and actually enters some of them on my personal blog on Dogster.com.

How do I feel about it? It's kind of embarrassing.

Well some of them, I think she believes that they are so cute; she wants to hear them a second time. You want an example; okay well there's Maya-Maya, Baby-Baby, Puppa-Puppa, Chubby-Chubby. On the other hand, maybe mommy is under the impression that I cannot hear her the first time that she says the name & feels the need to repeat it a second time, ugh!

Which brings up - what is up with the weight-related nicknames? Not only do I hear Chubby-Chubby, but how 'bout Chubba, Chubby Butt, Chubba the Hut, Chubbalious or Chunky Monkey! It's my body type really. Hey, I am pretty lean & mean as bullies go.

You want me to go with that theme... Well, you know me doc; I try to see the humor in every situation and will try to make light or a joke out of everything. I guess it is my way of dealing with stuff.

You want to play a little humorous game and then you can tell me who should be on this therapy couch my mommy or me? Okay, I give you a nickname and a hint of what I was doing (See #1-11 below), then you try to match what my mommy was thinking, doing, reading or saw on the television (See answers A-K). I swear you could play this game as you drive to your favorite vacation spot. Ready?

1. ___ Austin Powers (As I pee after she has been working all day - 8hrs. thank you very much)
2. ___ My 'Lil Palmetto Bug (Wearing my safety yellow swim vest)
3. ___ Puppy Power
4. ___ Silly Willy (Adjusted from Chilly Willy)
5. ___ Crusty the Clown (Eye discharge in morning)
6. ___ California Cow (Laying in the sun on the hill at my dog park)
7. ___ Captain Kirk Shoulder Roll (Wrestling with my pal Tug)
8. ___ Smack Down - Brother (Continued wrestling with my pal Tug)
9. ___ Puppa Smurf (Mommy's last name is Murphy)
10. ___ Richard Nixon (legs splayed out, jowls billowing as I rest)
11. ___ Chunky Monkey

a. Star Trek
b. Cartoon Network [The Smurfs]
c. Commercial - It's the Cheese
d. Worldwide Wrestling Federation (WWF)
e. Austin Powers Man of Mystery
f. 'Ole time Hanna-Barber cartoon
g. Ben & Jerry's (yum yum)
h. Watergate (He got a US stamp, Mommy remembers he WAS a CROOK! Although she was 7 or 8 at the time.)
i. Past Vacation in Florida (oye vey the bugs)
j. Saying of Scrappy Doo's on Scooby Doo
k. The Simpson's

I know that I am being a bit sensitive. Yes, I know my mommy loves me and there are many dogs out there that have it worse off than me.

It's just when I have had a tough day of lazing around, listening to the radio, waiting for her to get home - On tough days like this, it just is hard to hear all that stuff. I am sensitive! You know mommy named me after a Hindu goddess?

Well, let's just say the goddess now wants to pass an edict! No More Nicknames! No More Sharing Said Names With the General Populous. THE GODDESS HAS SPOKEN! Wha, wha woo... I fell asleep? Huh, oh my time's up? I hate these 50-minute (so-called hour) sessions!

Okay I will go home & communicate my needs to mommy in an open, win-win scenario-type discussion where no feelings are hurt. Yes, I will also try not to make it confrontational and I promise to use plenty of "I" statements like - I feel embarrassed when you call me those silly names in front of my peeps. Alternatively, I get upset when you call me anything that begins with Chub...

Thanks doc, by the way does my pet insurance cover this visit? No, I didn't think so...

Doggie University: Advanced Level - Workin' It (301)

Students, Students!!!! Listen up doggies.

I am sorry to say that Tony Robbins cannot be here to conduct his motivational seminar "Being the Best Dog You Can Be"; which was to be followed up with the movie 'Because of Winn-Dixie'. I will take this time today to discuss my topic (which was to be the counter-point to Mr. Robbins') one that is near and dear to my heart - Workin' It.

I see that there are a few pups in the class. As this is normally an advanced level (301) course, I'll bring the level of the content down for you puppies in the audience. Get out your notebooks there may be a Blue Book on this or it just may appear on your final! [class grumbles] I have plenty of #2 pencils up here, if you need one. Excuse me, Excuse me - you two pugs over there... Mr. Bean do you have a problem? Do you want to share with the rest of the class what you just snorted to Beau The Pug?

Let's begin with the Theorem: Doggie Owner - Parental Love = Spoiled Dogs

Proof: 1. The amount of spoiling is in direct correlation to evil eyes or spankings received, one parent working too much, the lack of attention & love shown and the allowance $$ amounts given to your mommy/daddy.

2. Socio-economic factors that exponentially increase the output: Number of siblings, Birth order of parent, Income class level of family, Geographic location of childhood, Nationality, et al.

3. Incidences that may adversely impact numbers: Number of pets owned, Type of Pet [Fish - increases #s, Cat - no impact due to independence, # of Dogs - plus/minus 1 ], Breed of Dog (clinical trials in the area continue to be conducted)

The supporting equation I have summarized as:

DO-[(P1+P2+P3...)+(SE1+SE2+SE3+SE4...)+(I1+I2+I3?)] = SB

Maya Spoiled Behavior Meter (Figure A)

I
I * * * * *
I *
I *
I *
I *
I I I I I I I I I I I I I ad infinitum
(yrs lack of luv)

Ergo: Exploit that experience. Now you don't have to be a bully about it (pardon the pun), it can be as subtle as:

1. Sad Eyes - a great one for after your parent(s) have had a long, hard day at work. They thought they were too tired to do anything, before you know it - you're walking around sniffing your favorite neighborhood haunts.

2. Ignore Their Advances - another that will yield great results that I used recently when my mom went away on vacation. Upon her return, I ignored her, while my bud Ahja went crazy over her. It broke her heart, but I don't think she'll go anywhere - anytime soon!!

3. Sit/Lay on the Furniture of Choice - another good one.
a. Get into position [bed, chair, patio lounge chair, etc.]
b. Give your owner the look like ' Aaaaw it smells so much like you! Can't I just stay here and bask in the you-ness of the sofa????'
c. Lay back & enjoy the spoils (don't be too rude by snoring)

Okay class we "killed" the obligatory 15 minutes, let's say we skip the movie and go out & enjoy the Spring Afternoon - Class Dismissed!

Reminder Puppies....
Your paper discussing Retired Colonel Corso's, 'The Day after Roswell' is due next week. And, it is not okay to cite dialog between Scully & Mulder from The X-Files to defend your topic in your paper.

[Overheard as class files out... Mr. Bean, 'Man we're even workin' Professor Maya!' Beau the Pug, 'Yeah, are we soooo spoiled, or what? We get an A+ in Woooorkin' it! Oh yeah!']

"M" is for Maya and So Much More...

My devious plan backfired. It's winter now and every day for the last four months mommy would run home from work, I'm sure she was driving like a maniac and literally grab me (pull, tug, cajole and dare I say almost choke me) to get me into the car and up to our favorite dog park before sunset. All this so she could relax and I could get some exercise and play with my dog park peeps. Does that sound like a relaxing scenario to you?

Mind you, not exercise for us; say at a nearby park or a walk on the treadmill for her at our apartment complex. Me, that's right.... "go run, play, and wrestle." But I don't always want to run, play and wrestle. I want mommy to rub me, kiss me and make her spot on the sofa available to ME. Me, me, me, it really is all about me! And, so I had to take drastic action.

These last four months pushed me past all reason. After the dog park, mommy and I would go home and she would spend another five to six hours on the computer completing a project she was leading. No rubs, no hugs, no kisses! Albeit, I did get the sofa which I must say there was no glory in having - since I didn't guilt her out of her spot.

So being a sensitive, intuitive, psychic doggie, I wished her computer to stop working. I sent my telepathic, doggie x-ray vision to dismantle the "M" key and guess what? The "M" key broke! I achieved my goal, or at least I thought.

Why the "M" key, you ask? "M" is in her username; "M" is in her password (because it is, after all, the first letter of MY name). There was no way she could log in from home because I shut down her two methods of logging in [evil laugh ensues].

My plan was foiled! My mommy is a brilliant woman - I swear, "M" stands for McGuyver! That McGuyver guy could save the world from nuclear disaster with a paper clip, his watch, chewing gum, and his superior, creative problem solving abilities. Mommy is always 'pulling a McGuyver' sans the paperclip, watch and chewing gum, gosh darn it!

Crickey - if she didn't keep that laptop working!! I don't know how though, 'cause I'm too short to see how she did it.

The good news is that the project is over! The bad news, due to corporate re-alignment mommy lost her job - and I now have what I wished for - my mommy all to myself ! Never realized - she's quite the talker (especially when it's time to catch some ZZZZZ's).

The moral to this story...

Be careful what you wish for!

Dog Park 411 or Should I Say 911

PSST buddy...

You with the pocket protector and that Ipod hanging from your neck, psst ova here. I see a moving van is settling you in. Moving to the Valley? Silicon Valley?

Got a job? Cute wife? 2.2 children? How 'bout a dog? Ya got one, maybe two of those? You do!!!!

C'mon ova here, let me give you the low down on some of the bay-area dog parks. They say that 'dog is man's best friend' but ya see I'm not seeing that. And who is "THEY" anyways? The Man? And, are there any women or are they all just men.... but I digress, where was I? Oh yeah man's best friend and why I say? Think about it - because where "THEY" build the dog parks around here, can't say that MY FRIENDS were in the plannin' or buildin' of them.

Back in the day, back in NY - ya might find a body, maybe a chicken with no head from those voodoo practicn' neighbors around the block or something. Nowadays yous don't know what you will find!

Take Watson Dog Park for example...

Great park, lots of room to roam, it ran along side CA Highway 101, with its rush-hour traffic spewing toxic fumes. 'Dem diesel trucks and Harley's all noise-pollutioney - what? That's not a word? Well it is now - ya got a problem with that you geek moron?

Okay where was I... oh yeah Watson - well last summer; they (there's that "THEY" again) found some lead in the soil. I'm thinkin' 1) shouldn't "THEY" have found that BEFORE they built the park; 2) Where in The Valley won't you find lead content or other substances - there should be a sign Welcome to San Jose, Silicon Chips [not potato chips] Were Developed Here!

Other parks well let me see, there's Delmas it's built at the base of a highway exit ramp and next to the Light Rail tracks, makes me puke out of stress every time a train goes by. Delmas? Yeah that's the name of the park - you making fun of my NYC accent, Mr. Spock? Okay, where was I? Another Ryland is built under a highway and to spice it all up some drug trafficking happening - who knows what else! That's not a question, stay with me.

Here's one for all those small dogs that think they are big dogs - Fontana Park. High-Tension Electrical Towers run through it! Hang out there long enough and YOU WILL become a big dog because you mutated into one. Aaaah.... then there is my summer swimming spot, Almaden Perk Ponds - up the road are the old Quicksilver (a/k/a Mercury) Mines - I'm thinking run-off how 'bout you?

The best park by far is Ed Levin but watch out for the Milpitas Police as they lay in wait all sneaky-like, they are ticket happy, quota targeting, doughnut eating - don't get me started... This park sits on 2 acres and is very peaceful. There is a park entrance fee or ya can get a year pass. Lot of good people up there, ya know?

Well I look at it this way... We all gotta go sometime! Have a little fun, play with the dogs, but ya might want to think about pet health insurance. Got some?

Psst buddy? Ya got pet insurance? I got an insurance agent; let me give you their name? buddy - hey hey buddy pssst.

Letter to the Editor: Dog Park Mom... 'Freak vs. Mystique'

If you are here, you may have grappled with this topic. My mommy recently ate lunch with a colleague at work who went on & on about the people she met at a dog park that weekend - she called them Freaks!

My mom laughed and laughed but she then started to wonder when everyone left - Am I That Freak? Newsflash mom, Freak - as if you haven't heard it before!

[Flashback] Mom to a nun at private school in 7th Grade, 'I won't go to Confession it was a tool of the Spanish Inquisition...'

[Flashback] Older Sis, Sheila: 'Who do you think is dreamier Paul or Joey up the street? Mommy's response: 'Mr. Spock, I'll warm up his cold, blue blood'.

Freak, ya think?

Face it you've always been a bit different that's why you moved to California, remember (Land of the Pioneers, Free-Thinkers, & The Grateful Dead).

In a world where everyone's getting their Freak On in some scary ways, I always know where you are at night - safe, home with me snuggling on the sofa watching TV or listening to music.

You've finally begun to be yourself again. Crickey, you're actually talking to people - Big Step Mom! Remember - life isn't that cold or cruel a place. And, I have some cool Dog Park Peeps (My Pack).

Dog Park Freak?! WHATEVER, I Say! Get over it, Get my leash, Get in the car, and Drive Woman - Sunset is at 5:00 pm tonight!!!

Wow, I feel like the doggie version of Carrie Bradshaw, except there's NO Sex in This City - I'm Spayed! :o(