You all probably already know the most popular dog names of the year. You hear them around the dog parks, on the streets, even attached to little boys and girls, because we are a culture whose most popular names for dogs are nearly identical to its most popular names for babies.
You know the ones: Charlie, Max, Bella, Yawn, Cooper, Max, Sophie, Yawn, Buddy, Sadie, Lucy, Yawn. Also Riley and Yawn. God, these names are so boring.
Meet Peanut Wigglebutt.
He is a Dachshund. He does not have a boring name, and he just may be the most interesting Dachshund in the world. Witness, via Veterinary Pet Insurance:
“Peanut Wigglebutt is a kleptomaniac,” says his owner, Christine. “She stole multiple screwdrivers from our cable guy, and even stole Easter eggs from the neighbor’s yard during an Easter egg hunt.”
Multiple screwdrivers and Easter eggs! The stories this dog could tell. Along with master thief and handyman, Peanut Wigglebutt can add another title to her resume: champion. The dog won 2014’s Wacky Pet Names list, assembled by Veterinary Pet Insurance and chosen by public vote.
Peanut Wigglebutt is your wacky name champion.
Although, to be perfectly honest, to look at the top 10 wacky names, it’s a wonder Peanut was even in the running. Waffle Dots! Angus T Brackencrack! Airbubble McMuffin!
Who named these dogs? Drunk Chaucer?
Here is the full top 10:
- Peanut Wigglebutt
- Sir Hog Knucklehead
- Sasha Biggiepotamus Fierce
- Otto Von Longdog
- Zippity Do Dawg
- Airbubble McMuffin
- Hamburger Patty
- Angus T Brackencrack
- Mister Buddy Pickles
- Waffle Dots
Hell, these names are so good, here’s the full top 50:
- Peanut Wigglebutt
- Sir Hog Knucklehead
- Sasha Biggiepotamus Fierce
- Otto Von Longdog
- Zippity Do Dawg
- Airbubble McMuffin
- Hamburger Patty
- Angus T Brackencrack
- Mister Buddy Pickles
- Waffle Dots
- Ajax General
- Bacon Bite
- Beaudacious Maximus
- BC Wompum Stompum
- Bobo Prince Of Edinburg
- Bogey The Ebony Ace
- Brutus Pancakes
- Butkis
- Chief Tator Tot
- Der Jaeger Meister
- FL Martha Washington
- Ice Beefcake Stacks
- Knuckle Head
- Kung Fu Seabolt
- Lambchops
- Macaroni Al Dente
- Mindy Fluffer Nutter
- Munchkin-Dunkin
- My Buckaroo Buddy
- No Marley Stoppit
- Officer Piccadilly
- Panda Bear Pandy
- Rocko The Porkchop
- Rootie Patootie
- Ruffles Ms Truffles
- Rump Roast
- Sake Bomb
- Scar Huey Von Kitten
- Sergeant Gumdrop
- Sir Bubba Grunt
- Snickerdoodle Dandee
- Southern Comfort
- Tid Bit Tenacious
- Tide The Knot
- Twyla Punkin Twinkletoes
- Uncle Father Oscar
- Vienna Beef
- Zing Zing
- Chester Sugarfoot
- Gianna Von Doberman
This is the best list of names I’ve ever seen. I would go into war with dogs named like this — and I actually could, right behind Sergeant Gumdrop and Ajax General, with Snickerdoodle Dandee blowing the trumpet.
The next time you look at your Max, just think: You could have named him Sake Bomb.
Does your dog have a crazy name? Where would it fit on this list? Before or after Ice Beefcake Stacks? Let us know in the comments!
Read about dogs in the news on Dogster: