Drive Too Fast, Get Dog Poop in Your Face

Speed bumps, shmeed bumps. Drive too fast in Belmont, Mass., and you could be in for a bag of dog poop in your face. Such...

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speeding_car-1Speed bumps, shmeed bumps. Drive too fast in Belmont, Mass., and you could be in for a bag of dog poop in your face.

Such was the vigilante justice of a local woman who was so incensed when she saw a speeding car narrowly miss a bicyclist that she took the law — and a bag of fresh dog poop — into her own hands. She must have quite the aim, because although the driver was allegedly speeding, she hit him square in the kisser with the poop, according to an AP article. Was the driver in a convertible? Was the poop-hurling dog-walker actually Wonder Woman? It seems like a rather superhuman feat.

The woman has been charged with assault and battery with a dangerous weapon, vandalism to property, and disorderly conduct.

I love it. Poop as a dangerous weapon. Next thing we know we’ll need a license to carry it.

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