The Dog Star — Astrology for Dogs

Its a new month and time for something humorous! Before proceeding to the astrological forecasts for the month, place your tongue VERY firmly in your...

Joy  |  Oct 8th 2006


What’s Your Dog’s Sign?

Its a new month and time for something humorous! Before proceeding to the astrological forecasts for the month, place your tongue VERY firmly in your cheek! Its all in fun!

Thanks to the very talented Peter Ceren for writing this entry!

The Dog Star

Astrology for Dogs By Bema

Sirius, the Dog Star has finally moved away from the brightness of the sun to shine on its own in the predawn sky. So too, is it time for all the dogs of earth to shine on their own at last. Celebrate your dogness every morning just before dawn with your star, the brightest star in the sky, of course.

Aquarius

Most spiritual of the dogsigns, you make peace wherever you go. And lately you’ve been going everywhere. Mark new territory and leave your message of love. And speaking of love, a surprising new tail will appear this month. Take time with each new one you smell to see if they are the one.

Pisces

Fish-dogs, it is time to enjoy the water fully. Ocean, lake, stream or puddle, or if city dog, step on the edge of your bowl and splash as long as you can.

Aries

What can I tell you, Aries that you will listen to or remember? Its a waste of both our time.

Taurus

Be patient with your human, you know how young they are in dog years. Your stubborn patience will help you with the silly need of your human to try to make you do tricks to make up for their shortcomings. Be patient, you may live long enough to see some maturity in them yet.

Gemini

Restless and changeable, you are always looking for something new. Lets face it, you’re schizophrenic. The stars this month will only make it worse. You need doggie downers in your food bowl, and you are likely to get them the way you act.

Cancer

Howl at this full moon. As if I need to tell you. No other dogsign loves the moon as much as you. Party time. Then again, you usually party the rest of the month, too.

Leo

Lets face it Leos you know who you are, and so does every one else. You are the most obnoxious boorish sign of them all. You cant help it, it is just that your sign is born in a time that makes you unsufferably self-centered with a great need to control everyone since you know better than anyone. But even for you, this is a time to stop chasing your tail and chase some other tail. Love is in the air, but try to listen for once. It will be worth your while. You know how to pretend to get what you want. And just maybe you might learn how to really love for the first time in your life.

Virgo

How inappropriately you are named, Virgo-dogs. You are the most affectionate of the dog signs. Try to keep it under control for once, there are far too many puppies of yours already.

Libra

The second-most boring of the signs, try to get off the couch and do something. There is a wonderful noseful of world waiting for you if you would just let yourself go unbalanced for once.

Scorpio

You’re difficult. You’ve always been a difficult, , so just settle in and enjoy it. If you weren’t so attractive, nobody would talk to you.

Sagittarius

Oh wise dogs, try to act like a pup now and then. You need some fun. Chase some tails.

Capricorn

If there were accountants in the dog world, you’d be one. With a pocket protector. One for each day of the week. All lined up in a filing system. Color-coded. Match up with a Libra, they are the only ones who wont notice how boring you are. Keep moving or they will think you are dead. And keep telling yourself how deep your thoughts are, it’ll keep you breathing. Enjoy that Libra dog- that’ll be as much spice as your life can stand.