Because the laws for therapy dogs are so easy to skirt, people do it, taking their dogs everywhere that dogs otherwise are not allowed. Sometimes these people have real problems and just don’t want to go through the effort of getting an officially trained dog when they can simply buy a patch on eBay and get the same results.
But this isn’t about people with real problems and fake therapy dogs. This story is about a guy who doesn’t want to leave his little dog outside when he goes shopping. This story is about Brett David, a 33-year-old restaurateur who seems to be just loving spilling all his secrets to the New York Post, even posing with his Maltese Yorkie, Napoleon, in a Whole Foods in New York, grinning through his ice cream.
“I was sick of tying up my dog outside,” he told the Post. “Sometimes, they’ll give me a hassle and say bring the papers next time, but for five bucks, you order [a patch] off eBay, and it works 90 percent of the time.”
Wonderful, David! We’re so happy for you. What other dumb crap do you do with your dog?
“He’s been to most movie theaters in the city, more nightclubs than most of my friends.”
Super! I’m sure the people who work there are convinced Napoleon aids tremendously in your illness (you’re without a brain, aren’t you?), and will no way cast a suspicious light in the future on real service dogs who come in to their establishments. Certainly you’re not carrying on and potentially ruining it for others out their who really need their service dogs, fake or not?
“I don’t care who you are, a teacup Yorkie will trump a black [American Express] card when you’re trying to pick up a girl.”
Huh. Well, you have a point. Carry on, David.
Let’s hear from Kate Vlasovskaya, a financier, who tells the Post she bought a a phony “service dog” ID card online from the United States Service Dog Registry for her Cavalier King Charles Spaniel, Lila.
Why? Hell, I don’t know how you get to the Hamptons with your dog, but Kate takes the Jitney. Her $50 laminated card clears the way no problem. It’s real official looking — it has a hologram and even an ID number for the dog. She is not worried about anyone finding out.
“You’d have to go through all of these links or get someone on the line,” she said. “With all of that effort, they will probably just let you in.”
Also, she said that fake service dogs are “becoming pretty popular now.” The subtext, of course, is that only losers tie up their dogs outside restaurants.
This is not looking good.