If Your Dog Were a Human...creative writing...

This is a place to gain some understanding of dog behavior and to assist people in training their dogs and dealing with common behavior problems, regardless of the method(s) used. This can cover the spectrum from non-aversive to traditional methods of dog training. There are many ways to train a dog. Please avoid aggressive responses, and counter ideas and opinions with which you don't agree with friendly and helpful advice. Please refrain from submitting posts that promote off-topic discussions. Keep in mind that you may be receiving advice from other dog owners and lovers... not professionals. If you have a major problem, always seek the advice of a trainer or behaviorist!

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It ain't over- till the fat- kitty sings
Barked: Wed Mar 6, '13 8:17pm PST 
A game my son and I have often played with the cats...if they were human...what or who would they look like? What would their history be? What occupation might they have? Your dogs as humans?
I will begin-
Sophie would be in her late 40's with honey brown hair and a few gray highlights, devoted to her family yet rather neurotic, probably several tranquilizers and upset tummy meds in her purse, nervous around adults but totally enchanted by puppies...terrific nanny.
Callie would look like Dennis Leary, probably a firefighter living on Long Island, wrestled in college, more bluster than bite, loud and outgoing but a mushball inside, absolutely devoted to his family but wary of strangers...sometimes somewhat crude but a great guy pal.
Your turn, your dog as a human...
Jackson Tan

Lad about town
Barked: Wed Mar 6, '13 8:47pm PST 
Hmmm ...

JT would be in his 30s, blonde surfer type, Aussie, a life saver on Bondi Beach. He'd be really handsome and go to the pub for a beer with his mates on the weekend. He would be the sort who breaks up fights but if someone started him he would finish it. Basically he would just be an cliche Aussie surfer guy, lol. He would probably have a southern cross tattoo and a girlfriend called Kerry. And like meat pies, lol.
Jake Earned- his wings- 10.02.15

I am Murphy's- Law Embodied! <3- Me!
Barked: Wed Mar 6, '13 9:19pm PST 
Well i've done this before kinda.

Mr. Jake Beagle would be a 23 year old eccentric young man of English decent whom still in 2013 wears a top hat and a monocle. He would insist on wearing a suit with coat tails to any engagement despite how odd it looks in todays day and age. He would be an avid hunter in the English countryside (during holiday) and would sometimes come to the states to watch Civil War reenactments. He would also find Polo to be amazing if he could get over his irrational fear of horses.

He would probably be a kept man married so some rich older (Lady Havishum (Great Expectations reference) woman) whom is far too old for him and breeds fox hounds. He would be a historian specializing in the Colonial American Era prior to the Louisiana Purchase. He would also have a professional soft spot for Abe Lincoln.

Dispite his avid hunting he has seasonal allergies and has to wear glasses when driving. (the monocle is just for looks i'm afraid). He would have short bedhead styled hair and is always smiling even when he knows he's in trouble. He'd probably laugh a lot too and have an English accent.

He'd probably hate tea time since he's got a gluten intollerance so he can't eat crumpets or tea cookies.

As a child it was rough since no one quite understood his odd nature. The top hat wearing started very young in life as did his love for English Victorian clothing.

But he's got a winning personality so people tend to find his company enjoyable dispite is eccentric dress.

If Mr. Jake Beagle had to own a dog he'd probably as an up yours to his english background would own a basset hound since they're french hounds.

How's that? hamster dance


I love sitting- in laps
Barked: Wed Mar 6, '13 11:05pm PST 
I always wonder to the regulars at the beach, "wouldn't you just love to know what's in our dogs thought bubbles"? That always has me wondering.

As of now, Moose is a 9 yr old boy who wants so badly to be just like the older boys on the block. He follows them around like "a lost puppy" (are obvious puns allowed?) and will do just about anything to get their attention.
And when the older kids run after something and leave him behind, you can hear Moose yelling, "Hey guys! Wait up! I want to come! I can do what you guys can do"! And then when he catches up to them he's asking them, "What ya doin"? What do you guys want to do next"? "Hey, guys, watch me do this". Anything to impress the older kids. Anything to be as cool as them.

Moose, for now, is just a simple young boy who only dreams of being just like them one day.

More Bored- Collies
Barked: Thu Mar 7, '13 5:24am PST 
Pretty boy and he knows it.
Mid 20's.
Flowing blonde hair, incredibly intelligent, pretentious- looks down his nose at most others, probably plays something like soccer in his spare time.

16 years old
On the darker side of things, moody, a little anti-social, but still "boy crazy"

Giant Shih Tzu
Barked: Thu Mar 7, '13 8:25am PST 
This is hilarious...

Gunther would be about twenty years old, arrogant, and would probably have one of those "emo" hairstyles. He would have a Twitter account, Facebook, and even a Tumblr.. Basically, he would want a LOT of praise and attention for doing very little, and would be completely full of himself. He would come from a family where he was disciplined and had structure, but was praised WAY too much for small things. A "Golden Child". You know the type; that twenty year old who still thinks he's as great as Mommy says he is. laugh out loud

blue/brown eyed- girl!
Barked: Fri Mar 8, '13 5:35pm PST 
BOL what a great topic!! laugh out loud

Hmmm......Mika would be in her 30's I think......probably long flowing brown hair, blue eyes...her job would be something along the lines of a secretary....not putting up with anybody's crap! And getting annoyed by the younger ones around her at her job. Content to relax and watch movies with her family at night.

Lexus would be a fiery red head in her 20's or late teens. Snobby personality but people would love her just the same.....her job if any would be.....hmmmmm.......maybe a lawyer or something like that. Her night life would be crazy busy and going out with the girlfriends plenty...

Champion PPH
Barked: Fri Mar 8, '13 6:32pm PST 
thinking Rusty would be a bit of a loveable slacker. He would live on friend's couches, party hearty with his gang, charm the ladies with his soulful eyes, and be a terrific athlete.

His palate would be highly questionable: Top Ramen & bologna, wheat grass shakes, a fast food kind of guy. He'd be a sloppy drunk, spilling drinks all over the floor, but making you laugh so hard you'd spill your own drink.

He will get away with all this behavior, as he is the consummate charmer; never means to harm anyone-just is a bit clueless at times, but greets all folks like they were the best of buds. If he does offend, he will kiss up....as soon as he realizes he was being a bone head.
Miyu CGC

Bow down to the- Princess Brat!
Barked: Sat Mar 9, '13 11:08am PST 
Miyu would be in her mid 20's. She'd be accomplished- likely an athlete, in the FBI or CIA or something like that. Ambitious- she'd be one of those Ivy League go getters in designer clothes. Beautiful for sure, but at the same time not comfortable with it. Not comfortable with the attention she gets for it. Definitely a bit rough and tumble, not afraid to get dirty or to kick butt when the situation calls for it.

Not a girl's girl either. She will have some good friends, but like Angelina... women tend to just kind of hate her. And she's rather indifferent to them too.
Ava & Nix

Suburban Farm- Dogs
Barked: Sat Mar 9, '13 1:50pm PST 
Awesome thread! big grin Especially since I wonder the very same thing out loud to fiance about our dogs. (he probably thinks I'm crazy, but it's ok because he's got his own quirks. lol!)

I'll go by their actual age converted from dog-years for this one. laugh out loud

Ava would be a woman in her mid-30's. Pretty redhead with medium-length hair, has an athletic build. Not all real slim, but not overweight. Personality would be socially awkward and really shy. Most of her friends are seniors at the old folks' home, but she secretly wants to have some girlfriends her own age to go out with now and then. She's unsatisfied with her life in the city and dreams about someday buying a house out in the middle of nowhere, surrounded by wilderness so that she could go hiking every day. She'd be a nature watcher and always have a journal which she writes down her adventures in.

Nix would be about 20. He'd have somewhat of a sweet southern accent, having been raised on a cattle ranch in Texas (because in actuality his breeder raises cattle and Border Collies). He'd be skinny as a rail, with straight-to-wavy black hair. A really hard dedicated worker on the farm, but when he's done he likes to go in to town and party. He's kind of particular about girls, but when he meets a girl he likes he's hopelessly flirty. If he ever does get a girlfriend he'll treat her like a goddess. He's been known to act tougher than he actually is, and sometimes tries to pick fights with other guys.

Edited by author Sat Mar 9, '13 1:52pm PST

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