|Barked: Sun Dec 5, '10 6:35pm PST |
|(This is Ginger's mom again, posting as Bruno)
I guess I try to walk the line between "nice" and "honest." I don't know if I'm actually good at it yet-but I know other dogsters are worse!
So far as I see, people who start out posting as guests until they know the rules and culture seems to be doing it right. I think it's too easy to make judgements about someone once they have a profile, (based on stuff like their dog's name, breed, quality of photos, etc) and heaven help anyone who brings up a controversial topic before they are well-known on here!
I think Asher said this once- or something like it, I'm paraphasing, too lazy to figure out when and where she said it- "Sometimes it looks snarly and mean on here, but really we dogsters do respect each other. I know that Trigger's mom ((who often posts opposite opinions from Asher)) is a very conscientious and caring person, and very knowledgeable. We have conversation via p-mail that the rest of you never see, so the forums can look biased." P-mails are a big part of conversations here, and that doesn't show in the forums of course.
And like any forum, it has it's own culture, it's own slang and unofficial "rules." That can be frustrating. I know I go against the grain sometimes and get criticized. But I think if you stick to your guns and back up what you say with outside evidence, even if it doesn't change people's minds, they will stop being so hard on you.
And of course, if someone is giving you a bad time, DON'T TAKE IT PERSONALLY. That's the number one mistake I see- often the heckling is coming from only a few militants, not the general Dogster community, but the newbie doesn't realize that, they get offended and leave. For every poster who is over critical, there are probably ten lurkers who are thinking, "That was mean! I'm not going to dive into that thread and get my butt handed back to me, no thank you!" so they stay out of it.
Some people really thrive on heckling, and seek it out. I don't like to call anyone "trolls", because I think that applies only to people who do not actually believe what they post, and do it only to get a reaction. Dogsters aren't like that- some just like to air some very controversial opinions. Eventually you will learn to recognize these people, and take what they write with a grain of salt- it's like the boy who cried wolf- how many times can you get a rise out of people before they quit caring? Newbies often fall for it, though.
So, if anyone is still reading this monster of a post, PLEASE don't leave, new people! We need you! And veterans, don't leave either! We need your experience and continuity, no matter how mean or stupid it seems like dogster forums are getting- we need people like you to keep it on track.
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