 Barked: Sat Oct 25, '08 4:06am PST | |
 | |  | | Hello Sophie,
I apologize for the slow response. Whenever anyone posts anything, it comes directly to Mommy's e-mail, and for some reason, your problem didn't make it to the e-mail so I had no idea there was a dog that needed help with a problem.
I am appalled at the idea humans have to put us dogs in costumes. Halloween is definitely not a dog's holiday. Many mis-guided humans try to dress us in costumes, and then, to add insult to injury, they give the dog's candy to a bunch of kids who come to the door. If you have to dress in costume, you should at least get to go trick or treating for candy. However, you don't need sympathy, you need help to get out of wearing that silly bumble bee costume. Therefore, it is time for advice.
My first thought is that is you are going to dress as a bee, the costume should include a stinger which should be used immediately on whichever stupid human dressed you in that idiotic bee costume. That would be perfect, but I'm sure the costume doesn't come with a stinger. The humans wouldn't think the costume is cute if it could sting them.
Our best defense around here is to make putting it on so frustrating for the humans that they give up and leave you alone. Angel excels at this method. You have to be able to catch her to put a costume on her, and she takes off at the mere sight of a costume. They did get her in the "hot dog butt" costume last year, but only because it was a very simple one to put on. One little velcro piece, and it was on. A couple of years ago, Mommy tried to dress me as Superman which I guess in my case would be Krypto, Superdog. Both front legs of the costume have to go into my front paws. She put one paw in, and while she was putting in the other paw, I was taking the first paw out. She finally got the costume on me, and I walked away, and "walked" out of the costume. This takes Houdini like skill, but it has the desired result. I learned these skills from Flash, my bunny friend. Once Mommy decided he would look cute walking on a leash. She put the leash on him and he took off through the house like a hunter was after him, and somehow managed to walk back in without the leash. He also pouted for a couple of days, and wouldn't even let Mommy pet him. This worked out well since Mommy never again tried to leash the rabbit. As you can see, I learned from the master.
If you have problems mastering these tactics, my final suggestion is a simple one any dog can do. Whine. Whine the entire time you are wearing the costume. Get louder with each passing minute. Don't let up. If you continue whining, it gets on the humans nerves which must be near their ears for whining to work so effectively. Don't give up. They will try to ignore you, but keep whining. This is a very effective method. Chances are the humans will be taking the costume off in record time. WARNING: This method doesn't work well on humans who are deaf or who have significant hearing loss. Also, if your humans have a lot of kids or happen to be teachers or school bus drivers, this method won't work at all. These groups either can't hear you whine or they have learned to tune out whining.
I hope you have a happy costumeless Halloween.
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She wants me to be a bumble bee of all things! She says I will wear it and get my picture taken, which I just know she will send out to all the human family members. Then she says, I will have to wear it out in public, when we go to the Howl and Yowl festival which I will be attending here in our town. As if that is not enough humiliation, she wants me to wear it on Halloween night while giving out candy to the trick or treaters.
How do I get this crazy idea out of her head?
