Ask a Trainer8 Things I've Learned from My Dog-Training Clients

Dogster

ANOTHER INSULT

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FAST DAWG!

Barked: Thu Sep 2, '10 8:53am PST


	Well I told y'all about the humiliating thing my folks are doing! Feeding a stray cat (cuz he was skinny, big danged deal) on the front porch. Well the other night after he'd pigged out, we looked out and there was a POSSUM eating what was left. A POSSUM ON MY FRONT PORCH, EATING FOOD SUPPLIED BY MY PAWRENTS!!!!! I was mortified. And of course they wouldn't let me go chase the stupid varmint. (code)

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Did someone say - SQUIRREL???

Barked: Thu Sep 2, '10 6:09pm PST


	Ok, this has gone on long enough. Time for legal action. I'm contacting our union rep first thing in the morning to file a formal complaint! What are your parents thinking? I think the heat finally got to them

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Lord of the- manor,master of- the woods.

Barked: Fri Sep 3, '10 6:56am PST


	...an' now dat da possum knows der's food, like da cat, he will be back!!! What did yur pawrents do 'bout da possum? Where wuz da cat? Oh, never mind, it prolly wouldn't stand up to a possum. Gots any large neighborhood dogs dat might be called on ta give dat poss' da bum's rush?

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FAST DAWG!

Barked: Fri Sep 3, '10 7:02am PST


	Oh they are feeding the dumb cat earlier now and SAID they were gonna take in any leftover. I think they WANT to feed the possum, my mom probably, she's such a bleeding heart, "we are all one" sucker. (Especially now that she's seen Eat Bray Love - BOL.} I am NOT ONE with a possum, nor with a useless cat, for Dog's sake. (code) Let me know what legal says. This is paid for by the Union, right, prez?

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Lord of the- manor,master of- the woods.

Barked: Sat Sep 4, '10 5:56am PST


	Eat Bray Love?? Iz dat da one 'bout Roseanne's life story? Momma iz one wiff alotta stuff an' things but she knows better den ta try ta foist dat mind set on me!!

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FAST DAWG!

Barked: Sat Sep 4, '10 7:10am PST


	My take on the movie with Julia Roberts! OH GET THIS! There will be a dove or a redbird or some dumb bird under one of the feeders and no squirrels around so sometimes just cuz I Can, I take a run at the bird who's ya know close to me. And then they say, "Oh no, Maddi, birds are our friends." There is only one thing I have to say and that's : (code)

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Did someone say - SQUIRREL???

Barked: Sat Sep 4, '10 1:06pm PST


	Legal fees will be covered, per union reps. Looks like it's pretty well a given you'll be getting some compensation for those insults. Not sure what the consequences will be for the pawrents but it ain't gonna be pretty. You might want to lay low and leave town for a while when the sentencing is done.

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FAST DAWG!

Barked: Sun Sep 5, '10 9:11am PST


	What if I want to withdraw my complaint? I just remembered vacation - the mountains in October...

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Lord of the- manor,master of- the woods.

Barked: Mon Sep 6, '10 8:08am PST


	...ya might have a point der Mad'...when ya gets involved wiff legal sometimes da last thing dey say iz "don't leave town"!! Stuff like dat can rock on furever!

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FAST DAWG!

Barked: Mon Sep 6, '10 11:50am PST


	Well not that I don't have a righteous grievance but if I won a bunch of bucks, without opposable thumbs and without PAWRENTS, what would I do with it? And I really am looking forward to barking at all those cows that are in the pasture every time we go to the gate! Sophie, can we get the lawyer to put the case on hold until let's see next summer?

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