My heart is broken, I don't understand how or why this happened

Whether a dog dies, is lost or stolen, or must be placed in a new home, this is the place to gather together to give and receive love and support when you experience the loss of a beloved dog.

Obbie R.I.P- (2009-2013)

Barked: Wed Jul 3, '13 11:16am PST 
I am so upset right now. My heart is broken I just need to share my story with someone.Monday my Obbie passed away. I bottle fed her as a baby. She was a little baby to me. I carried her around and she slept in my bed. She was like a real person. She had temper tantrums, she sneezed on people and coughed on people.
In December 2012 I gave birth to a baby girl. My daughter was in the hospital quite a bit with different issues. We had so many doctors appointments. I missed a lot of work, lost my apartment and was staying in a room in someone's basement with my two dogs and my daughter and husband. I crate my dogs all day when I'm at work. I thought that if my dogs were to go to a new home with people who stayed at home they would be happier. I rehomed both of them after what I thought was careful searching for the perfect home. I sent Obbie to a family and it was the biggest mistake of my life. I didn't go to their home to check where they lived. I trusted someone to take care of My baby. I had a bad feeling about it. I ignored it. I let them take her. That was Saturday June 29th. On monday July 1st, I got a call that my precious baby had "run out the door" She was tragically killed by a car. She was trying to find me. It was pouring rain, and she hated the rain. She just wanted her mother. I drove down there on Tuesday with a friend because I could not work I was hysterical. I wanted my baby, I wanted to bury her or cremate her. I called everywhere to find out what happened to her. The cop took her away after a neighbor identified her. The woman told me after she went to the laundry mat the cop was at her house. You gave up looking for my baby and you just went to the laundry mat when she was out in the rain????The woman said she "didn't want to look at it" She was not an it! she was a she and she was like a child to me! I just lost it. We called everyone no one knows what happened to her or where the police officer took her. We went to the police station, I've called every town department, every animal shelter, animal control. I have no idea what happened to my little baby. I used to rock her to sleep, tuck her in, kiss her forhead she was like a child. I just wanted solice, I wanted my baby. What a stupid, stupid mistake I made. I wanted the best for her. I am so upset I have never ever felt this way in my life. I can't eat. Please tell me it gets better. If only I had her to cremate. I have no closure. She loved me so much, she trusted me and I let her down. I can't eat, I can't sleep..my baby needed me and I wasn't there. All I can do is try to educate people who were in a similar situation so that they re-home their dogs to a good place, charge rehoming fees, and things like this won't happen. I don't want anyone else to experience this pain. I want to know how I can do that..can I start a website? I always thought she would go elderly, in her sleep. This is so tragic. I lost my best friend I feel like not even going on. Thank-you for letting me just tell my story. Please read her bio, she was wonderful. Thank-you

Barked: Wed Jul 3, '13 11:22am PST 
Wow that is tragic. I am so sorry for your loss. Don't blame yourself. hughug

Member Since
Barked: Wed Jul 3, '13 12:01pm PST 
dear heartbroken- I just read yonds, for meur story and insenstitve people like these lack what I call humanity. there well below the line of humanness. I as a retired animal rescuer can relate. my coco is dieing on me. each day I see his legs give out, no longer jump on the bed,run or play with his toys. he still loves his food,water. he had recently cystitis-urine, I think its ok now-gave amoxicillin. in this life there are many heartaches.disappointments and love lost. I cannot decide where creamation or burial. they want 1,000 for burial in a pet cemetery. I think this happened recently like 2 days ago. time heals all wounds. are u reglious. I know u want closure. my cousins dog buddy in l.i.ny got lost from backyd and the town sanitation picks up all dogs and does not notify owner. I as a rescuer had clout and knowing important people had everyone on the case. no results. just pray for obie. I need your prayers too. im 66 yrs old and all alone with no kids,husband,boyfriend or a lot of friends. in fact, someone called ananmously the aspca cops on me that my boy was in deep pain,when they came they saw who I was and how well cared for and loved my boy is.case closed. so u see one of my neighbors in apt. house that smiles at me did this. my name is dogster name is peaches and u can respond back to me via email lydiaprincipio@yahoo.com or here, im on facebook too. keep the faith. peaches 1176977.

Misha- (R.I.P.- 4/29/13)

Play or hide?! I- dunno... @_@
Barked: Sat Jul 6, '13 12:32pm PST 
I'm so so sorry you lost your baby like that. frown It's really really hard, you were just trying to do what was best for her please don't blame yourself. You could have never anticipated this.

Try not to put too much harsh blame on the woman you re-homed her with, it won't help you feel better... Sometimes dogs get out on accident, even if the family is trying to do everything right. From what you've said, it sounds like the woman was having trouble coping with how something like this could possibly happen. She couldn't bear to look at Obbie because here was this sweet dog they had JUST adopted and suddenly she was gone. The woman probably felt immensely guilty and it was likely very hard to face you. Distancing herself from the situation could have been the only way she was able to cope.

Even if you had charged a re-homing fee and checked out the home... accidents can still happen. frown Going over all of the "What If"s and "I should have"s only prolongs the pain.
I hope you are able to recover her remains. Take it easy, give yourself plenty of time to grieve. It does get better. Take comfort in knowing she lived a wonderful life by your side and was deeply loved. You always always had her best interests at heart, you never let her down. hughughug

forever loved
Barked: Sat Jul 6, '13 5:24pm PST 
I'm so sorry this happened, I know it must be hard right now. My Twist has been missing for a couple months now, and I still wonder if I will be able to find him one day. Mistakes do happen, and in time I believe the pain will fade. Hugs.hughughughug
Sarge, our- precious- Angel

Barked: Sun Jul 7, '13 5:42am PST 
I am so very sorry to read this and you did the best you could do. Life just is not fair. We were dog sitting our neighbor's dogs, and went to close the front door and the dog got out - on to a busy road that we live on, and my husband and I chased the dog for 2 hours. Some kind neighbor opened their gate and got some food to get the dog in the yard, that is the only way we could have caught him. This dog, a labrador, had never even been on a walk, and it was a terrible situation. We have dogs and love them and try to be careful, and was written, unfortunately they can scoot by and get out.

Please try to not blame yourself. Do something positive in the name of your dog, maybe donate to a shelter in his name. If only life was fair, there would be no pain, no cruel things that go on with dogs, ie: dog fighting, etc. You are being thought of today and your family, and hold close that thought.
King Jackal- Jackson

Appreciate me- for the gift- that I am!
Barked: Mon Jul 8, '13 1:10pm PST 
So heartbreaking, indeed. My heart goes out to you. We had a similar heartbreak with a foster pup we cared for and loved over a year. It was an accident but a careless one. The adopter didn't notify us Gabriel had gotten away from her until the next day even though she had just signed an adoption contract agreeing to notify us immediately in this very event. After Gabriel was found dead, the adopter never even paid us his adoption fee despite knowing his vetting and care expenses we had already incurred were great. The adopter left his body at a nearby shelter and also left us to pay for his cremation. We felt tremendous guilt because we had trusted this person to love and care for Gabriel as we had for so long and now he was gone and she seemed to care very little. Many years later, I do now wonder if her avoidance was because she felt guilty too. There's no justifying her careless mistake or lack of responsibility afterwards. And, I will always wonder if Gabriel would still be here had she been more careful or if she had at least followed the guidelines she had agreed to in the adoption contract by notifying us immediately once he got away. But, while I am still very sad for Gabriel, I have forgiven the adopter.
Snowberrys- Shinning- Star HIC S

I'm a little- shit- disturber!!!
Barked: Tue Jul 9, '13 10:11am PST 
Obbie R.I.P- (2009-2013)

Barked: Tue Aug 13, '13 10:40am PST 
Thank-you everyone for your posts and understanding. It does help to know that other people understand or have been there. It isn't really getting easier.. I feel like it might be getting worse. I did sign up to volunteer a local shelter, I think this will help me, as I don't really have money to donate but I can donate my time. I know I should not blame the woman who took her in, the more time goes on the more I realize their intentions were to love and care for my dog. I don't like going on here and seeing her picture, but I am having a rough day and I just read every single response and every single one made me feel a lot better with your kind words, thank-you very much I really appreciate it.