Does Indiana feel sorrow?

Whether a dog dies, is lost or stolen, or must be placed in a new home, this is the place to gather together to give and receive love and support when you experience the loss of a beloved dog.

Indiana- Jones

Car?! Did you- say car?!
Barked: Thu Sep 27, '12 9:11pm PST 
Sorry for the long post....

Last night we had to put my soon to be ex husband's dog, Kenya to sleep. I never made her a Dogster page, so I am sorry I don't have any pictures. My old computer recently had to be replaced and I have yet to move all my information over.

Kenya was 16 yrs old this past Monday, 9/24, and she has been in failing health for a few months now and has been on pain meds for a while. The pills were $120 for a 30 day supply. I had no problem paying for her meds as long as she wasn't in pain. She went downhill faster the last few months. It first started with her slowing down from having trouble with the porch steps (falling up or down them), to losing a lot of weight. When she walked, her steps were a couple of inches along vs. a standard stride. It's hard to imaging, but she looked like she tried to move fast and went nowhere fast too. Our vet said she was just old and had tumors and putting her through tests wouldn't really prevent the inevitable because of her age. He did say she wasn't in pain, but she needed the meds to keep her moving. My Mom had her most of her life since she was never happy in our condo. But Indy would go to my Moms a couple of times a week and almost every day since my husband left in May. So he and Kenya were close.

We made the decision (not easy I can assure you) to put her to sleep last night. Me, my Mom and Uncle took her. I had to leave the room after saying goodbye frown

I had emailed my husband in Aug. about her deteriorating condition I asked if he wanted to be there if it didn't happen naturally, or if he wanted to bury her or have her ashes, etc. All he said was he appreciated me and my Mom looking after her and to let him know how much the vet bills were.

He wouldn't even show up for this. I sent him a message to inform him of what was happening. Aside from a few back and forth discussions as to why, he said that 'he was sorry, but couldn't be there tonight' or something to that affect, and thanked me for dealing with this. Not surprised since he never once came to see her after he left. UGH....Anyway, Kenya had really bad diarreah for about the last week and lost a lot of her weight (normally about 50-60 lbs. to probably 40 or so) in the last few weeks. She had trouble opening her mouth to chew and didn't want to eat at all yesterday. The diarreah was really bad and uncontrollable. Her breathing had changed as well in the past couple of days and the mess from her not being able to hold her bodily functions was uncontrollable and a lot for my Mom to bear seeing her this way. Although she is semi used to it with all the animals we have had.

I guess I am also justifying our decision. My Uncle said it was certainly the right decision. Kenya was barely able to walk and no amout of Imodium was helping. We are thinking colitis from all the meds. She was not comfortable.

At this point her quality of life was not there. She couldn't be left alone for more then a couple of hours and had to be guided up and down the porch steps or she would tumble.

The hardest part is second guessing the decision. I think we all do this? Both Mom and I were really hoping it would happen naturally, but it didn't and it was just too much to watch her looking like she wanted out. It seemed she had some sense of awareness, but when she wouldn't eat and stopped even sniffing the ground, I think she was in a state of unawareness and was just going through the motions of what she knew.

I left Indy home all day yesterday. I knew we were going last night and I didn't want him to be there or sense Mom being upset even if she holds it in. Indy is sensitive to human emotion and has always tried to comfort me when I was going through a tough time. When he went to her place today, Mom said he sniffed around a lot and looked worried and a bit sad. After we got home tonight he looked at me with very sad eyes and even his body language when he sat looked sad.

I am trying to remain normal, but he senses I am faking it. I don't think Indy has a complete grasp on what happened, but I am sure he senses something isn't right since she isn't here anymore.

Is there anything I can do for Indy to make sure he doesn't get depressed? He was not himself for several weeks (even didn't eat like he normally did) after my husband left, and I really don't want him going through that feeling of loss and not understanding why again. I'm sure he will miss her. I think if my attitude is positive, he should be ok. It's just hard to hide certain feelings and I think he sees through me when I fake it.

Any advice is appreciated.
Angel Annie

Love my treats,- oh yeah!
Barked: Fri Sep 28, '12 7:06am PST 
Fly Fre Kenya. little angel Sometimes the best thing we can do for them is let them go and be free of pain. I'm sorry I don't really have any advice about Indy. Time passing I think will help. hughughughug

Akita Pals- Always.
Barked: Fri Sep 28, '12 7:07am PST 
Indy is going to know,he is certainly sensing both your and your mothers emotions and he will mourn and grieve in his own way and time just because his friend is no longer there. He will be okay,it is a normal part of life to be sad and grieve losses,why she is not there isn't really a factor to him,just that she is not there. You did the very best thing you could do for Kenya in letting her go,you freed her from pain and suffering do not second guess yourself it was a very loving and selfless act.In fact the last and most loving thing we can do for them is to be selfless and free them when we know that they are suffering and nothing more can be done.hughughughughughug to you and your family. little angelrainbow "Fly Free Kenya"rainbowlittle angel

Kali earned- her wings- 10/21/14

She's game for- anything that's- fun.
Barked: Fri Sep 28, '12 5:47pm PST 
I went through the same thing with Kali when we lost Jax in May. Jax raised Kali. I spent extra time with Kali and did more fun things. It was good for both of us. It was only about a month ago she started getting back to her old self. So, yes your dog will miss your other dog and will also sense your grief. Time will make it a little better for both of you. hughug

Huge heart, big- funny clown
Barked: Sun Sep 30, '12 7:20am PST 
When I had to let my little guy go, a little over a year ago--he wasn't feeling good about anything. The spark in his eyes had dulled, and he was just not the happy little soul that he was notoriously always was. I couldn't in any conscience make him keep on trying to go on. It almost killed me to let him go--but I made a promise to him as a puppy, I would never let him suffer. My last act of love for him was in letting him go. I KNOW it was the right thing to do--but it still makes my heart ache! We also had a cat then, that was a big part of his, and my life too. The cat grieved so badly for his playmate, I was really worried about him too. People don't place much sentimental abilities to cats, they are such independent little souls--but his kitty really suffered too! We all suffered in our grief for Sam. Yes, your other pup will grieve too--guaranteed. You will need to show more attention, and gentleness towards him. Love him as much as you can--he needs you, and YOU need him too! Let him know he's needed. Dogs respond to our needs so deeply, as you already know! I'm so sorry for your loss. You let your beloved pet go--because you loved him. It was a peaceful release from all the pain. You did right by him. Be well, and love your remaining pup as you loved the one you had to let go of.

Akita Pals- Always.
Barked: Sun Sep 30, '12 8:07pm PST 
Lincoln when my grandfather passed away his cat who managed to outlive him by another 5 years was very affected. He would walk around the house looking for him,sleep on his things,like his side of the bed,and even acted out in ways he had never done before,so I believe as much as cats seem to be a bit more independent and aloof they are quite capable of grieving and feeling loss just as dogs and people are. You by the way are a very handsome an unusual looking boy.