|Barked: Sat Dec 15, '12 3:18am PST |
|Rhon and Lar, I was thinking of Dixie last night, and what you have said about some encouraging you to let her have a safe journey. Rhon, no one has been through more saddness than your family, with your 3 sweethearts in a matter of months. How you got through that, you did all you humanly could.
All I can share is what happened to Rocky who had nasal cancer and although bleeding at the nose quite profusely at times, we were sure he would make the three months that the vet thought he had. The day he was so bloated, a Saturday, and I took him over to the vet who said we should let him go, Tom and I could not go it, we could not. That night, our precious Rocky went through tests and transfusions and things for hours, surely as we felt he would benefit and be well. The next morning, we came to pick him up and we saw a dog who could barely stand up, eyes black with pain and bleeding. I knew that I should have let him go to his well earned peace and rest the night before and not put him through all of those tests and he spent his last night in a cold barred cell with a cement floor. I will forever hate myself for that, Rhon, as you know I have written of it before. I wanted to stay with Rocky at the vet, and they said no. We did what we felt was right. But Labs, and most dogs, are stoic, they will soldier on through the pain to 'please us'. That is the hard part, as they don't show how badly they feel. Later on, we heard that Rocky's nasal cancer had reached his brain and was around his eye, and it is like the worst headache, neverending. Our best friend for 12 years, and the last day was spent in pain and finally being alone.
You and Lar have to do what is in your hearts. I only share this as I would do things differently now. My intentions were to make Rocky 'well', and feel good to have another few weeks. I will carry this guilt the rest of my life, but I thought I was doing the right thing. Bless you and Lar, now, and DixiePearl, so loved.
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