Aloof? Or just a puppy?

Got a new, young, furry love in your life? This is the place for you to ask all of your questions-big or small! Just remember that you are receiving advice from other dog owners and lovers... not professionals. If you have a major problem, always seek the advice of a vet or behaviorist! Most important is to remember to have fun with your new fur baby.

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Doogan

Doogie Bowser!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 11:35am PST


	I'm worried about my 3 month old puppy.... no not about his health; as far as I can tell he's healthy, happy. But he doesn't seem very engaged with me, which is puzzling because he wasnt acting that way when we first brought him home (he'd follow me around the house, fall asleep in my arms, when we saw him for the first time he came right up to me); the behavior he's displaying now started about a two weeks later. I want to preface this by saying that he does show some affection; when I pick him up he licks my face all over, when you're sitting at the computer he lays on your feet, sometimes he'll follow me around the house, but for the most part he just doesnt seem to be into people (although he loves our other dogs) at the moment and it's breaking my heart! You'll call him and 7/10 times he'll just ignore you or look at you like your nuts, doesnt seem to want to be petted. I'll sit down on the floor with him and instead of coming over right away he'll just stay sitting where he is unless I tap on the floor to lure him over. I dont know what to do. This puppy was bought to keep me company at my apartment away from home and I guess my biggest fear is that I'll end up with an aloof, unaffectionate dog which is the farthest from what I was looking for (it makes me cry just typing it). What do you think this is? Is it classic signs of an aloof dog or just an independant, stubborn puppy stage? Could it be that he's bonded to the dogs and not to us? Does anyone have experience of puppies that seemed to be a little aloof at first and then turned out to be great, fantastic, affectionate dogs (because that would make me feel so much better)? I hate that this makes me so upset as I know it's not his fault, and please don't think that I'm a terrible pet owner because of it, I adore all my animals, but I'm worried that if he does turn out to be aloof that I'll resent him everytime I look at him (because I could never give him up or rehome him for any reason... thats not the way we operate here) and that's no way for either of us to live . HELP!

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Cosmopolitan

Cosmo- I love to give- kisses!!!!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 12:16pm PST


	Well... let me start by saying PLEASE DON'T CRY, EVERYTHING WILL BE OK!! One way to gain some closeness with Doogan is to start training with him. Maybe enroll him in a puppy kindergarten class. This way, he will become more socialized with dogs outside of his pack at home, and also start spending some individualized time with you. Training is the thing that brought Cosmo and I very close. When she was a puppy, she was more my boyfriend's dog, and I didn't really like her that much. I loved her, but I didn't LIKE her. When we started training, I took the responsibility for it, and therefore more responsibility for her in general. We are now VERY close and I really think it has to do with the training. And also, when you do the training, and then you get compliments on how well behaved he is, you'll feel GREAT! So anyway, start some individualized training. ALSO, think of it like this.... you could have a really needy puppy who will never leave you alone, and you would never be able to make a move with out him being worried you would leave him. This would also probably include seperation anxiety, which is never a good thing. At least he is a little independent, and can handle being without you. I really think that the trainign will help, and he will come around. If you need to talk about this if its still bothering you, you can paw mail me!

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Roscoe

Roscoe the Human

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 12:32pm PST


	Roscoe is now 10 months old and when he was younger he hated to be petted. If you tried to pet him, he would try to bite your hand, but now he'll sit down and rub against you like a cat so you'll pet him. He would follow me around, but just didn't like to be touched. I don't know what it was that changed, maybe it was something to be learned. I do agree with Cosmopolitan, I took a puppy class with Roscoe and I feel that we really bonded. He became a more obedient puppy, plus it helped establish me as the dominant figure. Don't worry, Doogan will grow out of it and puppy classes will help!

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Mia Bella

Just a little- girl!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 1:03pm PST


	I agree with Cosmo. Training is one of the best ways to bond with your pup! I had tons of fun with Mia in her puppy kindergarten class and it really helped us to bond a lot. Good luck and it will all work out.

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Doogan

Doogie Bowser!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 1:30pm PST


	Thanks for the responses guys... I can't help it, I'm just so torn up about this and it's driving everybody else around me crazy too. He is socialized with other dogs outside of our home, he goes to puppy day care about four times a week right now because I have finals and dont want him sitting in the kitchen alone because I cant supervise him- he gets along well with all dogs. With the training, I am planning on taking him to puppy class but he does have a significant amount of training under his belt as we took him to day training the second week we got him (great job with the come guys... NOT SO MUCH), thinking it might help get a jump start on potty training (not so much again). I will try as you say to spend more time working with him, I just hope it gets better because right now its just so frustrating... he's the cutest little fluff ball and all you want to do is hug and love on him, but he's just seems so disconnected. EDIT: I forgot to mention, we've had him for about a month and a half Edited by author Sun May 6, '07 1:32pm PST

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Paku

Red Boys ROCK!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 1:52pm PST


	I think it may also have to do (a little) with him being a boy. Paku went through that stage, where he wanted to be independent. He didn't pay attention to his name, and could care less about being loved on. As a matter of fact, he would push you away if you got too close. This went on for several months, and then, poof! He decided that it was okay to get the loving. I went through this with my male Toy Fox terrier when he was a puppy also. Of course, Paku's uncle (Omari) has been a cuddlebug and lover from the beginning. He never has exhibited that independent streak, but he also does not have the confidence that Paku has since Paku is alpha male in the household. I used to cry too, because I wanted Paku to love me the way I loved him. He still has his aloof moments, but he also has his cuddlebug, I love my Momma moments, too.

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Cosmopolitan

Cosmo- I love to give- kisses!!!!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 2:49pm PST


	when you took him to training in the beginning were YOU training him or were you dropping him off at daycare and letting them train him? I was confused by that part of your post. I think that YOU working with him is the only way that youur closeness will grow. you just have to put the time and effort into it.

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Doogan

Doogie Bowser!

Barked: Sun May 6, '07 3:41pm PST


	Sorry about that, yes... it was day training... we didnt want him home alone while I was at school or working so we thought it would be a great way to jumpstart his training. Like I said, taking him to puppy class and beyond is at the top of my list once I finish my finals on Tuesday (wish me luck!). He is a really calm puppy so once we get past the stubbornness of him not responding to come I think that he has the potential to be really trainable. The situation with him is just difficult in general because I never know what to expect. He is a really freindly dog and always super happy to meet new people, but in regard to me, its always touch and go; never know if hes going to come over and plop down on my feet or look right thru me. Also thank you so much Paku... It's great to know that I'm not the only one this happened to and that there is hope. Like I said, Doogan has his moments and I just need to hold on to those times and keep praying. Any other similar stories would be very welcome (with happy or not as happy endings) too!

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Rosalita Lola "Rosie"

Love is never- being told you'- naughty!

Barked: Mon May 7, '07 5:44am PST


	I was just wondering, there isn't any chance he's deaf is there?? He is gorgeous and he needs love no matter if he is aloof or not. I am sure he's just a pup and his character is changing all the time.

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Tucker

What's Heidi- doing?

Barked: Mon May 7, '07 9:23am PST


	Hi there! IT WILL BE OKAY! I think the other posters have hit it right on! Start to do some training with the pup just one on one, no other doggies for distraction. I think dogs will always choose eachother over the human if given a choice. It's just a matter of making yourself as fun and interesting as the other doggies. My Tucker is still much more into Heidi than he is into me, but he definitely reacts better now when he thinks I may have treats to give! LOL! Try taking him for walks by himself, or try a long leash in a feild with extra yummy treats in your pocket. Call his name and give him lots and lots of the good stuff when he responds, if he doesn't pay attention, reel him in and let him know you have goodies! I know things will get better for you. Don't worry! Once your dog gets to know you and all the excellent things you do with/for him, he'll come around!

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