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Falling in love with a dog you could never have

If you are wondering what is the right dog for you, this is the place to be. In this introductory forum we talk about topics such as breed vs. mix, size, age, grooming, breeders, shelters, rescues as well as requirements for exercise, space and care. No question is too silly here. This particular forum is for getting and giving helpful, nice advice. It is definitely not a forum for criticizing someone else's opinion, knowledge or advice. This forum is all about tail wagging and learning.

  


Member Since
02/20/2012		 
 
Barked: Thu Apr 19, '12 10:57pm PST 
So, I make a habit of checking Petfinder and my local dog rescue sites every few weeks, even though I can't have a dog just yet. I always check up on the ones I like, to make sure they get adopted. But recently, there has been this amazing dog posted in my area that I want to take home so badly it hurts!

Link to her listing: http://www.petfinder.com/petdetail/22719433

The worst part of it is, though, even if we could have a dog right now... I don't think I could handle her. She's listed as a purebred Border Collie, which is one of those breeds I love, but don't consider myself nearly experienced or active enough to take on. Has this ever happened to you? How did you resist taking on a dog you knew wouldn't be a good fit?
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Angel Lou

Everybody wants- to be a...DOG!- not a CAT		 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 8:29am PST 
My oh My, she really is such a beautiful dog. I am going to be honest with you, if the only thing that is holding you back from getting a Border Collie is the energy and stamina. An you really do like the qualities of the breed. I generally accommodate my lifestyle to make the dog happy.

But then again I am the type of person if I want a dog bad enough, I am pretty stubborn and do anything to accommodate my life, so I can own my dream dog, at least once. cloud 9

I too have a secret love for Border Collies. Just waiting to get one until I get settled into a house.
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Milton

Im just a little- guy		 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 8:52am PST 
I had a friend with a dog very similar to Milton in appearance. This dog was taller and was black with white socks with a tipped tail. He was sooo smart and trainable. The coolest dog ever. I treated this dog like he was mine. I walked him to the dog park often and took him hiking. He also would go mountain biking with me. The dog knew lots of tricks, and some of them I trained him to do. He was the fastest and most athletic little dog. He could jump at least 4 feet in the air.

My friend would not sell him to me.

I was sad when they moved away. I really wanted this dog. Of course the handler also loved him. No amount of money could of bought that dog.
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Savannah- Blue Belle

A Heart of Gold!
 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 9:19am PST 
Once, while waiting in a vets office with one of my pets another person was waiting there with a totally beautiful border collie. I got talking to her and she said she had adopted him when his elderly owners moved into a care facility.

He was sooooooooooooo sweet and calm. Not at all hyper or antsy. Maybe a Border Collie can be owned by a person who has a less active lifestyle?
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Kodiak

The cheese ninja		 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 9:58am PST 
Are you inactive because you are disabled or work 14 hour days, or just because you haven't found the time or energy? I wasn't active either, until I had Kody! He's great at getting me off my butt. Do I want to listen to a whiny, restless malamute, or watch him dance with joy as he explores new places and gets loved on by dozens of strangers? Hmm. . .
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Zephyr

1213425		 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 10:22am PST 
I think it's a smart idea to wait on a Border Collie. Generally they're not good beginner trainer dogs because of the intensity and by her looks this girl is stock or performance bred so will probably be amped. She's cute but under the cute is a dog just dying for a job. If you can't provide one it will not be a good match.

"The worst part of it is, though, even if we could have a dog right now... I don't think I could handle her. She's listed as a purebred Border Collie, which is one of those breeds I love, but don't consider myself nearly experienced or active enough to take on. Has this ever happened to you? How did you resist taking on a dog you knew wouldn't be a good fit?"

I was offered a lovely Dane but it's a bad fit for me for numerous reasons. I was waiting on my other dog at the time so timing was off which helped. I didn't think about what I wanted but what would be best for the dog. I was not the best possible match for him and in the end he went to a better home for him.
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Farley

Farlekiin the- Dragonborn		 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 10:59am PST 
I think the responsible thing one can do is to admit and acknowledge when they cannot provide what the breeds requires to be a fulfilled, happy, healthy dog.
There are many breeds I see that I just absolutely adore from afar, but know I could not give them what they require.

I believe getting a breed you cannot handle is doing a great disservice to dog. Too many people get dogs based on looks alone, or because they met one at some point that had a totally laid-back/couch potato temperament, but if that is not the breed standard, then it's unrealistic to expect that to be the norm.

Have you contacted the rescue that Border Collie is with? Why don't you speak to them and find out what her energy levels/temperament is like?
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Jackson Tan

Lad about town		 
 
Barked: Fri Apr 20, '12 7:13pm PST 
I agree with Farley. It does you or the dog no favors to take on someone who needs more than you can give.

I am lusting after a GSD or malamute right now but have hurt my back and have lost a lot of upper body strength. I am determined to fix that before I even contemplate a large dog. There is no point having a such a big dog if you can't lift him or control him if he has a tantrum, but you can definitely take steps to make yourself more compatible. For you that would be finding time and activities for a border collie. If you cannot find the time in your schedule i.e stuck at work long hours then the 'typical' border isn't for you.

However, there's no harm calling the rescue and finding out what the dog is like, she might be chiller than she looks (but on that note, in my opinion she looks too well bred to be quiet and she is probably been given up by someone who couldn't handle her.)
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Axis

Nocturnal One		 
 
Barked: Sat Apr 21, '12 5:02am PST 
"Falling in love with a dog you could never have"
... happens only too often.

I have a habit of looking up breeders for Australian Shepherd or German Shepherds in my state and browsing their available puppies, and then pretending I can /almost/ purchase one and bring them home.
Otherwise, I browse gsd rescues around my area every couple weeks (sometimes every few days when I'm not busy), and pretend I'm looking for a prospective dog to adopt.... when I'm unable to have another one at the moment. It's insane, depressing, painful, and probably the worst habit ever. confused

Geez I'm almost beginning to create an imaginary dog friend in my room, it's that insane.

But main reason for me is that I'm not living at home where Axis is for the past half year. I visit every couple weeks for 2 days, but it's not enough to fill the hole in canine companionship.

Edited by author Sat Apr 21, '12 5:04am PST

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Member Since
02/20/2012		 
 
Barked: Sat Apr 21, '12 2:27pm PST 
All of you make great points. I would never take on a dog I knew I couldn't provide for, of course - it's the love from afar that gets me. Jackson and Farley, it does tempt me to call the rescue, get some information and meet her in person, but seeing as we can't have dogs in our current apartment... It would be torture! I wasn't really seriously considering adopting right now, just wondering how to get over wanting a breed that's just not right for you.

Axis - hahaha, that's exactly what I do with Decker Rat Terriers and several breeds of spaniel! Oh, the pits we dig for ourselves.
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