October 21st 2012 12:50 pm
[ View A Comments (9) ]
Oh woe is me! I have very sad news to report regarding my stuffie rancho. Early this morning someone was banging on the door of our garage and before daddy could even get out of bed and see who was making this racket, the door came flying open and in came a bunch of ARMED FBI agents demanding to know which one of us was Puff Darby.
Peaking my head around my momma’s legs I decided it probably wouldn’t be a smart move for me to try to bite any of them, but at the same time, I did not volunteer that I was the one they were looking for.
Daddy wanted to know why armed FBI agents were bursting into our garage (yes, we are still sleeping in the garage but that is another matter that I will address some other time). Anyhow, one of the agents stepped forward and said his name was Agent Smart and he produced a piece of paper that he said was a signed by some judge authorizing the raid and that they were looking for any activities that were related to stuffie Patent infringement.
I looked at Coco who had her mouth stuffed with the biggest cookie that I have ever seen and whispered to her that I needed her help on hiding all of the stuffies that were currently being harvested at our stuffie rancho.
Coco mumbled something but since her mouth was full I couldn’t understand what she was saying.
“Coco, please come help me gather up all of the stuffies and hide them until these people leave.” Coco dropped her cookie down and told me she was busy and that she would come help me after she was done with her cookie, then she picked up the cookie and went back onto the bed and started chomping on that huge cookie again.
I snuck outside and went into the green house and was able to snatch up the raccoon stuffie that the Papillion pack had recently sent for cloning and high tailed it to the wood chipper pile and buried it deep in the center of the chips. As I headed back to the green house to rescue more stuffies, I saw daddy, momma and Agent Smart come out of the garage and start calling for me.
Of course I didn’t want them to know I had been by the wood chip pile so I ran back around the trees and came out on the other side and then walked up to the humans.
“Puffy, have you been re-producing stuffies here on our property?” momma asked me.
“Yes momma, they grow really well in our wonderful soil.”
Around this time, the FBI agents were taking away all of the potted stuffies that I had growing in the green house and they were asking if I had any planted outside.
“No Mr. FBI Agent, it is way to cold now and stuffies won’t grow anyplace except for in the green house.”
“Okay Mr. Darby, here is a court order to appear in Federal court on January 13th 2013 to discuss the Patent infringement issue. Until that time, all stuffies removed from your rancho will be impounded and held while this matter is looked into. I suggest you get yourself a good lawyer as you are going to need one
And that my friend is what happened…I am beside myself with worry about all of the stuffies that were STOLEN from me. All I was trying to do was help my pals get more stuffies and now I am in trouble. Momma and daddy are upset saying that we don’t have money laying around for court costs and fines should the judge rule in favor of the people who hold the patent on the stuffies. To make matters even worse, most of the patents held were by foreign nationals so I am going to have to deal with a multiple of different charges from all over the world. How was I to know there was was such a thing as Patient infringement? Can’t a little dog make a living farming stuffies if he wants to? Whitley and Finley I could use your services, again…
At this time, Coco comes wandering out and asks what she can do to help but it was too late because all but the one raccoon that I snagged was gone.
I looked at Coco with tears in my eyes and told her what had happened. She asked me where the raccoon was and I showed her and she started to laugh.
“Look Puffy, the raccoon has had babies and the wood chips have made a perfect nest for them. They look so cute! The Papillion pack is going to be very pleased with the results.
Coco scratches her head and said raising stuffies in New Mexico has been a lot of work so let’s collect Meadow muffins instead? All we have to do is encourage cows to come visit our property and then we can collect the muffins and send them to our city pals who have never tasted such good treats. We can still get rich and I will volunteer to be the official taster to make sure they all met my quality standards.
Puffy dries his eyes and heads off to see the local cows to get some meadow muffins…
Are you sure you wern't having a nightmare dude? Please don't send us any meadow muffins. I don't think mom knows how to fix them.
Don't worry, me and Finn will defend yous! And we's also bites invading FBI dudes, BOL!
hahahahahahaha... don't worry Santa is on his way .. i told him where to find you and he said stuffies are on the list ! hahahaha !!!!
Yeah, we'll get a writ of habeus stuffius and dey'll have to produce all da stuffies dey stole from ya!!
And we'll argue if dose stuffies reproduces when ya plantz 'em -- well, dey shoulda sold ya "fixed" stuffies!! Heck, dere is prolly a law against sellin' stuffies dat can breed, ya know?
BOLBOLBOL!! "habeus stuffius" :D
OMD, Finwey, I jus' 'bout peed my kilt! BOL!
ROFBOL............Maybe, we need to move your stuffie business to another location????? I know some places that are WAY WAY OUT in the boonies. I'll Help you Puffy....After all, you are just chasing a doggies dream. Isn't that the American way???????