Bessie's Big Adventure

Okay, it's like this. I was totally running around the yard and stuff, with the "puppy crazies" as my momma calls them, when skinny old Taj the cat goes screaming by. So I tried to chase him, but of course he totally cooned me and jumped the fence. Whoa, no way! The gate was open; someone forgot to close it! I'm not ever allowed to go out on the Street by myself, but you know, I'm getting big, so I thought, "Why not?" I could handle it.
So I go tearing out, Taj is there licking himself on the garbage can, but at this point I can't be bothered with him. Dude, there was stuff to smell EVERYWHERE. Like food wrappers, pee-pee, and my personal favorite, cat poop! Omigod, I was in heaven. Well, next thing I know, this little homie is there, rubbing me, asking me all these questions, and then he picks me up! I'm like, wait dude, I'm on walkabout! Squirming didn't help; he trucked me a whole two blocks to his house. I was kinda worried about getting home, but then he gave me some nasty old wet cat food, and I forgot all about it.
I guess I was there for a couple days, I dunno, I was too busy playing with my new homey and making stinky cat food farts. Then next thing I know, he's walking me down the street, and I see my momma! Hey, where did she go anyway? She was all blubbery with some nonsense that I was lost, then she gave the boy some cash and we were home. Keepie like totally licked me from head to toe, and even Taj the cat rubbed against me. It was good to be home, and I think I might hang around here for a while. Especially as there is a big old chain on the gate now.

And so I am growing up...

Well, this weekend marks my 9th week aboard planet earth. I have to say, that while it has been somewhat of a struggle thus far, I'm really digging my new parents and my new bro, Keepie. I was real shy with this family at first, and sweet of course, but now that I feel comfortable, I'm really laying it on. Aside from about six hours of sleep at night, and a nap at noon, I am going like a house on fire. There is just so much to see and, naturally, put in my mouth. My favorite is when my mom tries to "sweep" me with the broom. Who cares about the dirt, just try and catch this diablita! Oooh, and the garden is just delightful; did you know that nasturtiums are edible? Now this one might make some people squeamish, but boy do I love to eat the cat's @#%&. Although for some reason, my mom freaks out when I do it. But my all-time favorite is at night time, when my family gets sleepy, and my mommy, daddy and brother(and sometimes the cat, when he isn't outside making poop for me) all cuddle together under the covers. But who wants to talk about sleep, I see a flip-flop that needs chewing!