Happy Birthday to Me, Happy Birthday to Me........

Today is my first birthday. The Girl made a cake, but it had chocolate so I couldn't have any. So what's the point...honestly? But we had fun and Mom was in and out all day, so it was an ok day.
Since we had my party last week, it was uneventful. Mom keeps saying I was a big boy now, but I don't feel any bigger than I did yesterday.
Well, gotta run. But one last thing...what's the blowing out a candle thing? I just can't get that whole thing?

Ahhhh.....Smokey Sausage- Goodness.....................YUMMMMMMM...

That Mom...when will she learn? She must just LOVE to cook (what a domestic)! Here's her latest venture in futility:
Mom is such a control freak (a control freak with food issues, YIKES!) that she comes home and cooks for The Girl and The Boy before she goes back to work. She usually throws some food our way while she's cooking. Well today, she was making a simply MAV-E-LUSSSSS smoked sausage, mashed potatoes with saurkraut and salad. Frankly, I'm not that fond of lettuce, but she IS human, so we overlook it. LuLu and I were enjoying the aroma and were waiting patiently for our share. BUT NO!!! We get DOG FOOD!!! :(:(:(
THAT didn't make us happy!! We sure didn't consider forgoing any sort of food, just in case she wasn't totally heartless and gave us a couple of nibbles of sausage. But, alas, no!! It was time for her to go back to work and she started getting the food off of the stove and onto the serving plates the the humans would put in the microwave. While she was dishing out the saurkraut, she left the sausage way open and I decided to fake right and charge left towards the sausage while she was busy with the saurkraut, even though I wasn't that hungry. (It was the principle of the thing, right?) Ahhhhh.....I can't describe the sweet smokey goodness of that sausage on my tongue....YUMMMMM!!!!!!!
Then all of the sudden...BAM (no, it wasn't Emeril, it was Mom's fist coming down on my head.) I dropped the sausage on the floor and in one fell swoop, Mom had me in the crate and my sweet smokey chunk of sausage goodness was still on the floor. WAAAAAAAA!!!! BUT IT GETS WORSE!!!!! Then Mom did something that I just couldn't forigve, she washed the piece of sausage off AND FED IT TO LOOSE-E RIGHT IN FRONT OF MY CRATE DOOR!!! The NERVE!!!! Well, I hadn't told Mom yet, but the crate door has become almost a big joke. I am so big, that all I really have to do is push on it with both paws at once, and I'm outta there, so that's what I did. As LuLu was just finishing her last bite (which she savored, s l o w l y), I broke free. Mom just kinda stood there, I actually think that she was thinking, "He wouldn't dare"....Silly, silly Mom. What was she thinking? This time, there was no "faking right" goin' on...I made a B-line to the sausage plate, which Mom had foolishly left out in the same spot. I grabbed the first piece I could get ahold of and dove back into my crate. I vaguely recall glancing at Mom, who could only stand there, in amazement, with her mouth hanging wide open. But that Mom, I should have known better. She just HAS to be APLHA!! ~~~~~~~~ I KNOW you want to know what she did!~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Well, believe it or not, she dove into the crate, business suit and all, right behind me!!! Now I am the one with my mouth hanging open!!! AND MY SAUSAGE FELL OUT!!! So she grabbed it right up!!! Then she scrambled out of the crate, slammed the door shut, and put a chair in front of it, so even if I opened it, I couldn't get out. What control issues she has!!!
~~~~~~~I KNOW you want to know what she did next!~~~~~~~~~~~~
Well, believe it or not, she washed it off, sat on the chair that was propped against my crate, AND ATE IT!!!!!
As if that weren't enough, she said, "Ahhhhh.....sweet, smokey, sausage goodness.......yummmmmm!"
GRRRRRRRRRRRR...........................................

Happy Mother's Day

Today was Mother's Day. I don't really get it, but we had fun anyway. Mom kinda lounged around in her PJs for awhile, but by noon she figured breakfast in bed was out, so she got up. She has been fixing up the house, so we were outside almost all day. What fun!!! Later, one of Mom's human kids came for a visit from far away. So, we went inside. Mom got a new sofa and we aren't allowed to be on it. WAAAAAA!!!!! That makes me SAAAAAAAD:(
Even worse, in the middle of it (it's all hooked together) is a single seat, so even if I could get on it, Mom always sits in the middle seat, all by herself. So for a Mother's Day present, I figured out how I can give Mom snuggies and lovin's, without getting on the sofa!!! I hop onto the bench behind the sofa, put my big ole paws on her shoulders from behind and give the back of her head snuggies and lovin's ! I am such a good baby boy!!! Then I put my paws around her neck and she laughed and laughed.
Mom wanted The Girl to take pictures of me giving her snuggies and lovin's so we could be in the Mother's Day Stroll, but she wouldn't. What a Meanie Weanie Chili Beanie!!!

Yummy, Yummy Noserings!

I just love my Mom soooooo much...I could eat her....so, I DID!!! Well, actually I only tried, but I definately got a piece of her. Here's the scoop: Tonight, Mom and I were doing our normal snuggles and lovins' on our special spot on the sofa. Mom was being pretty calm and sitting still (not normal for her). So, I felt obliged to amuse her with my puppy-ness, since this makes her laugh really hard, usually. But tonight, she was just still, and although she was giving me snuggies...she wasn't really playing and being very fun. So, I decided to hug her with my front paws, because that ALWAYS makes her giggle and laugh...but she just tried to bat my paws away!!! THAT didn't make me happy. She has never done that before. So, I tried to type on the laptop, because that makes her laugh too...but NO AGAIN. So, I put my giant head near her face, like I was gonna give her kisses. But instead of kisses, I nibbled her nosering right out of her nose!!! She didn't really think I did it at first, but then she touched her nose and realized it was gone. So, she looked on the sofa, on the floor and in my mouth-but no nosering. She finally gave up and figured I ate it.
Yummy...............

Sorry....I thought I was an Antelope there for a minute

One of the things I love the most about playing with LuLu in the house is when I jump over her onto the furniture. Lately, I have started jumping over other people too. The Boy was an early favorite, but I lost interest in doing that to him, since he really isn't that much taller than LuLu, anyway. So, Mom is the natural next target. When she sits forward on the sofa, in our favorite spot, I can reach her in a single leap (yeah, baby...me and Superman) from about 8 feet from the sofa. So on Sunday, Mom was just chillin' on the sofa when I came running in from the kitchen. When I saw that she was just beginning to sit down, and hadn't even grabbed the laptop yet, I just couldn't resist. So I took my normal flying leap. Theoretically, I should have flown over her directly into my spot on the sofa, so we could have lovin's and schnuggies. Theoretically being the operative term. In my wild abandon, I made a serious miscalculation on my ability to jump said distances. While I was in the middle of my jump, which was short, instead of coming down in MY spot, I landed in Mom's spot. Unfortunately, Mom still wasn't in Mom's spot, but was getting the laptop and in the process of getting into her spot. Since my jump was short, I actually landed ON the laptop, as Mom was picking it up, which (inertia being what it is) caused the laptop to slam into Mom's face at about the same force as if it were a semi hitting her face at around 50 miles an hour. BOY.....was she MAD!!! When she regained consciousness, she put me in my crate....WITH NO LOVINs! WAAAAAAA..........................

April Showers

"April Showers bring May flowers", that is what Mom always says whenever I don't want to go out in the rain to poo. I don't know about that, but I DO know that I still hate the rain. Where we live, it is raining all the time now, and I have to go outside in it. When I have to poo, I am always afraid I may get some backwash on my Doberbutt. EWWWWW!!! Mom is incredibly unsympathetic, I'd like to add, and refuses to let me back in until I do what she wants. She can be really stubborn, too. In fact, she is even MORE stubborn than before since she put up the new fence. With that, she can stand out on the porches and be dry while she waits for me to do my business in the cold, wet rain.
Mom installed an "invisible" fence last weekend. NO FUN!! Sometimes, I forget and when I get close to one of the flags, she makes this obnoxious noise. It is really hard to explain, but it isn't a human word, it is like the human form of what a live electric current would sound like. Frankly, she really gets more attention from the neighbors than from me when she makes it. It also works great on The Boy! She tells him that I listen better than he does, so she decided to start giving HIM the same commands so that maybe he listens as well as I. Hmmmm....let's run with that train of thought for a moment.....I see no reason why The Boy should be without a collar of his own. I think that Mom should get him one and give him a couple of volts everytime he misbehaves, just like I get a zap when I leave the yard boundaries. It only took two good ones until I remembered where I was supposed to be. Sounds like a plan....somebody go tell Mom.
Well, gotta sign off for now. There are a ton of dog shows in Harrisburg this weekend and Mom says we might go!!! YeeeeeHaaaa!

It's a Sad Day

Today, it has been a year since Ian was buried. Mom didn't do much all day, but looked really sad. On the one year anniversary of his death, we and some of his best friends met at his grave. Mom was glad that they came, one from very far, to be with her. Beside his grave, was the opening for the grave of one of Mom's friends, also the father of one of Ian's best friends and Ian's cub scout leader. Mom had to go to his funeral an hour after the gathering at Ian's gravesite.
I hope Mom gets done being sad soon.

Gosh.......Things sure move FAST at our House

Hi, Everyone!
Golly, my house has sure gone CrAzY! Mom got a new job and has finally gotten the house back in order...well, as much as possible! Mom has been taking us for long walks on nice evenings. I love doing that. Mom says she needs to loose some of her "winter coat".
Now that Mom has another job, she doesn't always dress the way she used to. At her new job, she wears "nylons" almost every day. Then she started complaining that they were always missing. I love Mom's nylons, because they are like having half of Mom, even when she isn't there! They smell like her, too! I really like the way they feel in my mouth. Nylons.....YUMMY!!! One morning, Mom was looking all over for her nylons. Eventually, she gave up and settled for knee high nylons since she was wearing pants. After that, she started wearing them instead of the "half-Mom nylons", since she almost always wore slacks. They weren''t nearly as much fun, because they weren't shaped like her, but hey, any port in a storm, right?? Soon, she couldn't find them anywhere, either. Then, one day, she took me out early in the morning. Mom doesn't usually do that, The Girl does. Mom looked down...and found out where all of her nylons were going. They had all been "repackaged", and since The Girl doesn't clean up the yard as often as she is supposed to, Mom saw them all laying out in the big back yard!!

OUCH!!!

Well, tonight I went to get my chips. NO FUN!!! I was excited because I didn't know if I was going to get Barbequed, Rippled, or if I were REALLY lucky, Mom might spring for Doritos. BUT NO!!! We went to the place that gives me the CReePS (Waa-Waa!). Here's what happened:
We got to the place and, as usual, whenever I get to a new place, I had to pooh, so I did, right there at the entrance door(at least I waited until I was out of Mom's truck this time). The Girl was along, as was The Boy and they were bickering over which one was the biggest jerk (I think they are pretty even). Mom was already annoyed and now she couldn't open the door, because if she did, my tidy little pile would have smeared over a three foot square area and the door. So, she asked the girl to get a poop bag and clean the poop. Ha-ha...that Mom...what a dreamer! The Girl couldn't, of course, because of the probability of one of her peers seeing her from the road (appx. 500 ft.), while she was crouched over, with her back to the road, behind two rows of parked vehicles, IN THE DARK!!! Mom said that Elvis could have given a free concert there and no one would ever know, but The Girl was unconvinced. So, while Mom took me to finish my pooh, the girl came over to the grassy area and told Mom she had it all cleaned. But when Mom took us to go into the office, she found that the girl had picked up the pooh (smearing it into the concrete) and put it IN THE ASHTRAY RIGHT BESIDE THE ENTRANCE DOOR!!! WOW!!! Even I know those aren't the kind of cigars that belong in THERE!!! Mom was sooooo angry, she couldn't talk...not a good sign!! The Girl quickly realized her error and told Mom that she would clean it up, which I suppose she did, because she is still alive. Well, although there were all kinds of animals there, there weren't ANY CHIPS AT ALL!!! Soon, they took me back without Mom and gave me a little shot, which I didn't mind at all. After my back went a little numb, they did something, but all I knew is that I got alot of treats (but no chips).

So Do I Get 2005 Biscuits?

Well, last night Mom & I were sitting on the sofa and Loose-E started fussing. Mom and I went out with her to see what she was upset about. Well, when we got out there, there was automatic weapons fire, fireworks and police sirens screaming down the street....And we live in the quiet section of town!! LuLu was REALLY anxious then and Mom said,"Happy New Year!" Humans....go figure!!!