January 5th 2009 8:42 am
[ View A Comments ]
Hi ya sweet MISS BEATRIX ! Pssstttt...... yea, it's me, over here....in Texas...in the dark kitchen corner, hiding bee-hind the Labretriever-top pooter on the kitchen table, in my newwww Christmas prezzie doggie bed....Ahmmm trying to bee incognito, camm-OH-flaujjjjedd!!!
Plus, adoptive Daddio iz twying to sleep for sumpin cawled werk 2marrow, so Mahmmma said we habs to be extra-spawshell kwy-ette! I know, I hab no klooz, I'm a dockshund, I don't know what kwy-ette means, but anyhowl...
That's why eye hab to whisper...Sssshhhh....here, habs a biss-kittt.....
I just had to woofs you a sea-kwette....No ubber woof on Dogster will do, not eben my adoptive sissy & brudder...
So here goes....I learnt howl to makes my furry own doggy door! YEEESSSSSS! I did! Fur really! I kid uuuuu not! I know, I know, I am shokked myself, but I really did do it! Of course wif yer help tho, dear MISS BEATRIX , I was channeling u when it happened!
The big adoptive Daddy (who had the flu buggies when him drove to pick me up frum the prison) taked me out to do gentledoxie bidness, and cuz he big hooman, he TALKS LIKE THIS! Not bee-ing mad, mind you, him juz talk big az him voyse & bod-ee iz. Me still kinda afeered uv big menz, me not telling why.
Wheeeeel anyhowl, me finish gentledoxie bidness, feel kornered by big adoptive Daddy Hooman man who TALK LIKE THIS, and me heared Mahmmma Dog in kitchen talking like this so sweet say "wolfie want a bizkette u sweet little dumplin' u, watt an angel u n yer brudder n sissy r come to Mahhma"!!!
Wheeeeel, watt me pozed to do but torpedo smack dab through SHUT sliding screen door? Straight into Mahmma's little bitty sweet voice handz that held a bizkette?
Big Daddy man outside, still goe-eeng (((BOOMBOOMBOOM))) wif big voyse, Mahmmma standing in living room hearing (((RRRRRIIIIPTEEEAAAR))) azz screen door come down all around this little, angelick wolftot!
Then, guess watt? Mahmmmma bust out wif a belly-laugh, (((BWAHAHAHAHAHA))) & big hooman daddy man stand there in shawck & awe booming ((("WHEEEEL WOOD YOO LOOKIE THERE!! NOW WHEE ARE LIVING IN A BARN!!!”)))
Big Mahmmma realize big Daddy az shawked & awwwwed az I beez, so we all juz have good ole belly laffz till daddy try to fix screen wif steak knife. Did someone woof "STEAK?" Az I sit at Mahmmma's feet waiting for good-boy-go-potty-make-own-doggy-door-treat!
Anyhowl, it not work, we hab flappin' Wolfie door now, & it all in honor of my dear furiend, MISS BEATRIX !
So fangs u furry much my dear furiend, fur tee-ching me howl to make my furry own doggy door. I will furever be inn-dette-ed! Here, habs ann-udder biz-kette....sshhhh....
XOXOXO, your faithful study, the ann-jell-ick Wolftot