Apple Died Wednesday, Nov. 9th, 2005

Our beloved daughter, Apple, passed away at 1:20am on Nov. 9th.

I haven't been able to bring myself to write anything about this until now. Thanks to all her special virtual doggie friends on Dogster for the kind messages.

Apple didn't suffer long--she became noticably lethargic (and increasingly so each day) for about 2 weeks prior to her passing. We began bringing her to the vet every couple of days and calling them nearly every day as her condition worsened. We found her platelets were low and were dropping by the day. She was getting different injections and x-rays and all sorts of tests, but nothing made a difference.

I realized on Monday, Nov. 7th, that she was failing fast--I called the vet first thing in the morning and went in to work just to get my computer. The doctor called me back there and told me that they believed they saw a mass on her spleen from the x-rays they'd taken the day before and that I needed to rush her to a certain specialist who'd cleared her schedule for Apple to give an emergency ultrasound. I was shocked and devastated. Maybe I was in denial all those days...who knows?

I drove about 100mph to get her x-rays and pick her up and take her to the specialist. Once we arrived, she collapsed and bolstered with a shot of adrenaline, I managed to carry my 65 lb. girl through the parking lot and into the clinic. There, the vet techs immediately set to work on getting her vitals--she had a 105 degree fever and no blood pressure. They spent the next couple of hours stabilizing her and then we devised a plan of a deluge of tests, x-rays, ultrasound, aspirations, etc. to figure out the problem--she had so many things going wrong suddenly, but nothing clear as to what the problem was--the ultrasound did not show a mass on her spleen, but did show other abnormalities.

My husband and I stayed there until the hospital closed and the plan was to hospitalize her for 2 days, then get her in for an MRI. I gave her a quick hug and kiss goodbye (which my husband captured on his camera phone in case I missed her that night), and we went home for the evening. I really thought I would see her the next morning. The doctor called us at 1:30am that night to tell us the sad news.

My heart broke that moment and I still don't know how I'll ever be OK again without her. Though we still have our 4 other dogs and 3 cats, the connection I had with Appley was unlike any I've ever had, or will ever have again. We shared a brain, I swear.

We learned that Apple had an agressive carcinoma of the spleen and liver, but what caused her death that night (and no/low blood pressure) was a condition called DCI or DIC (I can't remember). It weakened all the membranes in her body and she was slowly but steadily bleeding to death at the capilliary level--so nothing could be detected with x-rays or ultrasounds. The condition was a result of the cancer.

Apple would have turned 7 years old on Dec. 15th...she was taken far too soon, but I'm so blessed that I got to be her mom. I will love her forever.

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