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Diary of a fuzzy man

RIP My little fuzzy man

With incredible sadness, I am posting about the death of my two boys.
Gizmo and Atticus have both crossed the rainbow bridge.
They can no longer be my fur to cry in, my shoulder to lean on, or nonjudgemental pal to talk to.
I will never see these two boys again and it is breaking my heart in two.

Saturday June 13th 2009 will forever be etched in my heart. A painful memory of a horrible accident.
The decision Jamie and I made is one that will haunt me forever.
I would truly pay anything for a time machine to turn this all around.
To make Atticus better and to possibly have him from a tiny puppy to make sure no harm ever came to him.
To have Gizmo in my arms away from everything, from pain, from fear.
I would pay anything to just have one more kiss, one more hug, one more smell of their fur...but I know this is just not possible.

Gizmo walked into my life a very scared baby. He was 6 months old and the cutest thing I have ever seen. The noises he made were
just like Gizmo from the Gremlins. We were actually at the breeders to look at her poodle puppies. Out popped this little tiny chocolate chihuahua and it was love at first sight. Of course he was scared sh*tless of us at the time, but that didn't matter. It would be my mission to make this little dog love me, and love me he did.

Never a day went by that I didn't rub the head of my little Moot. He would always be there for a good scratch of the head and a kiss on the nose. This was known as his sweet spot. He would win many a lady over with this move. This is also why he became the official ladies man in my home. He would come to my store sometimes on Sunday and would turn many a chihuahua hater, into a chihuahua lover. He just had a way about him. He would tend to wounds and clean eyes...this is why we also called him Dr. Mo. This little boy had more nicknames then most people I know. He responded to each and every one of them. To me, he was perfect. The little chocolate love of my life.

I still see him all over my house. He had lots of favorite places to be. In bed unlike the ladies, he would lie between Jamie's and my heads. He would share Jamie's pillow with him. He did this after Jamie was fast asleep of course He was such a sneaky little man. He would also work his way up on the back of the couch and sleep there for hours. You could hear him grunting, working up the energy to jump from the foot stool, to the couch. You could see the little wheels turning in his head. He would always think before he did anything. He was my little smart man.

I think there are just way too many things I loved about this boy to put into one memorial post. I may just have to right a book on the ways of the Moot. Gizmo, you did not deserve what happened to you. We always said you were a lover not a fighter. You truly were in the wrong place at the wrong time. You are free from pain now though, which is the only thing your momma and daddy could do for you. I wish I could have mended your wounds or turned back time. There will not be a day that I will not think of you. You were my little fluffy man and I will never, ever forget you!

Now for the big love of my life. Atticus ran into my life limping at 9 months of age. A friend took me to his breeders to see all the dogs. She told me one was available because of a shoulder issue. When you have 10-12 adult looking danes running at you, its tough to pick out a shoulder issue. Instead, I picked out the one that I liked. A red looking clumsy brindle boy. To my surprise, that was the available boy. I had already chosen his name...he would be Atticus.

Atticus came to me a scared goofy boy. The first two days I had him, he had to be rushed to the vet for an obstruction. He had eaten a stuffed doll at the breeders house and was not able to pass it. Of course after a very expensive vet visit, they saw it moving along inside and he was going to be fine. He passed the toy arm in my yard about 2 days later..and to be truthful, I still have it in my freezer to this day. As my friend would say, it was very Grissom of me You see, this caused alot of problems between Atti's breeder and I. I will not get into details, but the first year of Atti's life was not always spent with me. He had a period of about 6 months where I do not know where he went. And I truthfully believe, this is the root of all his problems. This of course is not the place to get into it.

Atticus was our mascot for our race team. He follwed us to all our track events and was an ambasador for his breed. He loved on everyone that would love on him. Everyone knew his name and would look forward to seeing him. Even people that were scared of huge dogs eventually came up for a pat on the head. He is certainly going to be missed at our next race in July.

Atticus was my big lug to cry on, my big face to smooch and just overall a big love. You would stand right in front of you until you said hello or offered your chin up for a nip kiss. This is where he would give you two quick kisses on your chin, and one little nip for good measure. He would also offer his paw to anyone while we were out. Of course they did not know that this meant hug and not shake a paw. He definatley did his share of junk kicking with this

I can't believe it, but I will miss the horse comments, the picture taking and the general weird questions I would get about him. An hour walk would never take just an hour. You have to leave a question/comment cushion for walks with Atticus, or take them late at night.

Everywhere I look in my house, there is a memory of Atticus. It breaks my heart to even be here. The biggest memory is Ozzy. He is missing his big brother so much right now. He lost him once a long time ago, but we got him back. This time, he is not coming back Vixen also will not be the same. Atti was her best friend. She has lost her big comfy couch

So with this, I say goodbye to the two loves of my life. My little fuzzy man and my big clumsy boy. You were there for me when I needed you, and I thank you for that. Please keep each other company and wait for me. I love you with all my heart and miss you so much. You took a peice of my heart with you. RIP boys, I'll see you when the time comes.