September 8th 2008 6:32 pm
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So now I am on a doggie fitness regimen. Mommy has called me "slightly out of shape" and started taking me on long, fast walks. Slightly out of shape!? Not! But I am not a fan of the long, fast walk. I don't really want to go that far and I need time to sniff things and to take breaks under cool, shady shrubs. Now that Mommy is on this fitness kick it's all "Let's go, Tommy!" and "Keep it up, pups!" as we dash around the neighborhood to the beach and back. I just wish we could stop and sniff for a minute! How am I supposed to keep up with what is going on in the neighborhood if I can't sniff things? As a journalist, I would think my Mommy knows this.
To be fair, she is taking the blame for my so-called lapse in physical fitness. She said that ever since Diggy went to the Rainbow Bridge she hasn't be taking me for enough walks. Walking must make her miss Diggy. Walking makes me want to sniff things and pee on them. I miss Diggy too, but he was not the best walking buddy. I mean, really, he always had to be in the lead. He would try to scare other dogs, and when we got to the beach he'd be chasing birds all up and down. He was never a focused sniffer. I know all the regular dogs and where the chipmunks hide plus when a new dog walks along the sidewalk at the beach. I am proficient in doggie news and gossip. For example, I know that there are 4 cream-puff dogs around trying to act fierce while they are on summer vacation in Maine. These cream-puff dogs come from Massachusetts. There is also a new puppy in the neighborhood. He is a yellow puppy with a flying squirrel toy.
Such things would not interest Diggy. He just wanted to chase birds. Birds! Rodents and cats is where it's at! Today I barked at that Cupcake and her henchcats and they retreated to their own yard. I sure wish I could defeat this invisible fence and chase them right out of that yard and east, onto the beach and into the ocean like Mr. Edwards' Spiders. Mommy has us reading an anthology of New England Literature and Jonathan Edwards' Spider Letter is our present favorite work of literary art.
Mommy likes spiders. I am indifferent about them. It's cats I can't abide. Well, I am exhausted after my brisk walk this evening, so I am going to curl up on these pillows and snooze.
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