The Terrible Shot that Took my Cookie

Last week I went to vet for my annual exam. I don't like going in there, but mommy held me almost the whole time. But then it was time for my shots. I hate those. The doctor gave me my first shot. It wasn't too bad. I got a cookie when it was over! YUM! Crunch crunch cru...uh oh. I looked out of the corner of my eye and saw another shot coming for my little back. I stopped chewing the cookie immediately, I was so nervous I couldn't eat! Then the doctor put the needle in my back. It hurt so bad, I dropped my cookie. It hit the floor and slid under the door into the waiting room. Mommy said when I saw the shot, my eyes bugged out. That wasn't fun. And to think I have to go back and do that again next year...I hope those nasty shots don't take anyone else's cookies from them! Those mean shots.

Howloween

With Howloween coming it's gotten me thinking about what I'm going to be this year. Last year Mommy made me a bumble bee costume. I don't really like wearing it, but I do like all the attention I get when I have it on. Mommy daddy and my human brother Alex all went trick or treating. Alex had a treat bucket for him and he grabbed another one for me. We went from door to door and at every house Alex held up both buckets and said "this one's for me and this one's for my dog!" All of the people said how cute I was and gave me lots of candy (Darn! I can't eat any of it!) One lady even gave me milk bones! Yum! Another lady told me I was cuter than her baby! I enjoyed being dressed up with all of the attention I got! And to top it all off...I got more candy than Alex!!!

Mommy's mean!

Mommy says I amVERY stubborn and persistent. Last night my mommy and daddy were watching a movie and I wanted to play. While Mommy was making dinner I was playing fetch with my daddy with my second favorite toy--a piece of another toy I broke off--it's a rubber handle from a rope tug toy. Daddy kept throwing it for me and I would take off as fast as I could to get it...then I would run it back over to daddy and drop it on his lap so he could throw it again. Then mommy did the most inconsiderate thing...she brought dinner over to my daddy. I begged a little and lost interest in my toy...until I reallized that I wasn't going to get any of daddy's food. Then I started pushing my toy over to my daddy with my nose trying to get him to throw it for me again. After a while of whining, it worked...for a little while. About an hour into the fetching daddy started to get tired of throwing my toy for me so he threw it to mommy. Mommy played fetch with me for about 1/2 an hour. Then she decided she didnt want to play with me anymore...she wanted to watch her dumb old movie...how rude! I kept bringing my toy over to her and whining and pushing it up to her with my nose, but she wouldn't throw it for me. She kept telling me to be quiet and to lay down and go to sleep...but I didnt want to. Finally mommy picked up my toy! She was finally going to throw it for me. I crouched down ready to pounce on my toy...but she didnt throw it...she sat on it! I jumped up on mommy and began searching for my toy. I finally found it but mommy wouldnt give it to me. I started pawing at my mommy trying to get my toy free. I whined and cried as I pawed at her. After 2 hours of almost non stop pawing and crying I finally gave up and went to bed...mommy is SO MEAN!

Tails of my glutiny...

About a year ago, my daddy had made himself 2 hot dogs for a snack (he didn't make me anything...how selfish). My daddy went down the hall with his hot dogs and set them on the bed. I took matters into my own paws and as soon as he turned around, I jumped up on the bed and grabbed a hot dog, bun and all. Not wanting to get caught I quickly took it under the bed and ate it as fast as I could. When my daddy turned back around he had a very puzzled look on his face. He scratched his head and said to himself "did I already eat one of my hot dogs?...Maybe I already ate it..." Then I saw him look very closely at the sheet on the bed...He had spotted some ketchup I had carelessly gotten on the bed when I stole the hot dog! He then looked down at the carpet and spotted another spot of ketchup! My huge bloated tummy jumped up into my throat, he was putting it together. I was about to get caught! I anxiously looked around for a way out, but my daddy was blocking my only exit...the door. My only hope was to lay low and hope he wouldn't figure it out. Suddenly, my daddy looked under the bed and there I was licking my chops, partly out of nerves and partly because the delicious taste of hotdog was still fresh in my whiskers. My tummy was bloated and I had the unmistakable smell of hot dog on my breath. There was enough evidence against me that my daddy knew it had to be me. Boy was my daddy mad at me...Now he never lets his hot dogs out of his sight...

I can't believe I ate that whole thing...

Last week, I ate a whole 6 inch sub from subway...everything but the paper...there was no trace of the sandwich but the paper and my bloated little tummy...My daddy was eating his dinner and got up for a minute and left half of his footlong turkey sandwich on the coffee table. I jumped up on the table and pigged out. My daddy was very suprised that I ate that much because I only weigh 5 pounds. My tummy was twice it's normal size. I know what to do in cases of indigestion though because when I was at grandma's house I ate 2 whole rolls of tums...This isn't my 1st time being a little piglet. When I was a puppy about 3 pounds I ate a 1/2 pound burrito and again all I left was the paper. When I was with my first owner, my grandpa came to visit and was drinking a cup of beer. He set it down and I came over and drank about 1/2 of it. I was so drunk that I couldn't jump or walk straight. I also ate the cob from my mom's corn on the cob from kfc. The only thing I left was the foil and stick going through the corn. I don't know how I managed that. A few months later I got into some jelly beans. Long story short, my human brother wanted to walk me real bad for the first and only time because I pooped rainbow. I am a true latin chihuahua. I love jalpenos and salsa. My daddy once again made the mistake of leaving something in my reach. I drank his salsa.
I must have an iron tummy because none of this has ever made me sick!