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Too serious

June 4th 2009 8:46 am
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Fomfomfom and ah bee were complaining about people who complain about the PAP, our lovely government. We owe all we have to the PAP, they said. We are lifelong supporters of the PAP, they declared.

Cha came and enquired what they were getting excited about. They informed her and cha exclaimed, politics! Can we talk about something happier, she begged.

I decided to tell them something funny. An ant stepped on an elephant and the elephant died.

They must have found it funny coz they stopped talking about politics immediately and stood up and left.


Blackout again!!!??!

June 3rd 2009 8:32 am
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Ah ma asked me today why I always like to lick my volleyball Mikasa. She didn't wait for my answer but took Mikasa for a scrubbing. Mikasa is nice and clean now.

So the vet woman said I have arthritis, and I gotta take supplements for my joints. Ah ma frowned at the pills and decided to tackle the problem her way. Collagen, ah ma points out to me, can be found in lots of things. Like pig skin. Which she boiled in soup and gave to me. It was tasteless but it must be full of collagen coz it was sticky. It made my tongue sticky and I licked my nose and whiskers and everywhere was sticky so I wasn't happy.

Next we wil try fish lips from hongkong.


Blackout again

June 2nd 2009 9:05 am
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The lights suddenly went out at 11pm. The torchlights came out and everyone sat waiting for the electricity to come back on except for ah ma, who was sleeping oblivious to the blackout.

Ah bee is on her second day as advocate and solicitor of the supreme court of singapore, member of an honourable profession and officer of the court. But she didn't know how to switch off her blackberry. So she consulted fomfomfom, who is also, though not currently, an advocate and solicitor of the supreme court of singapore, member of an honourable profession and officer of the court, on how to do it. Fomfomfom said, drop it in water.

Then they finally put me to bed. Ah bee said lovingly what a beautiful face I have. It is a face that launched a thousand rockets. Fomfomfom regarded me too, lovingly, and said, it is a face that ate a thousand pig stummys.

My mamas are enamoured of me.


Children's Day

June 1st 2009 8:14 am
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So it is Children's Day today. I was watching a chinese celebration on tv with ah ma and ah bee when a woman talked about how she wishes her kids will have hopes and dreams when they grow up. Hopes and dreams! I have hopes and dreams.

I told ah ma solemnly my hope and dream is to have pig's stummy everyday, like I did today. It is an ah ma's responsibility to make sure my dream comes true, and I await my bright future with bated breath and eager tongue.

We love hopes and dreams.


Ah ma thinks new beds have nasty chemicals in them

May 31st 2009 9:53 am
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Fomfomfom bought me a new bed today. It is of an animalistic leopard print. I love it coz it's so sexy and so me. Ah ma put it into the washing machine and I guarded it while it was sunning, along with all my other beds and mattresses and pillow.

At night everyone went to a wedding dinner and left me at home with fomfomfom. I said I could hide in ah bee's pooffy dress but ah ma still didn't allow me to go. I waited at home for five whole hours, while fomfomfom watched tv non-stop. When they finally came back, I was happy and I jumped jumped jumped. The vet woman would have had a fit if she had seen me.

I don't care coz I have ah ma home with me again. *beam*


Eat first, think later.

May 30th 2009 8:20 am
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The roasted goose from last night gave me the runs this morning. But it didn't stop me from having some of the glorious char kway teow they had.

The runs, I worry about tomorrow.


Too much wasabi

May 29th 2009 7:47 am
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Fomfomfom wondered why the soy sauce was tasteless. It must be from a bad batch. So she threw it away and poured another plate from another bottle. Now even the scallop sashimi was tasteless. To her utter disgust, she realised she had lost her sense of taste. To my utter delight, I ended up with the scallop sashimi. For the record, it was juicy and plump and fresh and tasted real sweet. Yummy.

Ah ma and ah bee came back! They had lots of things in their bags, I particularly like the shark bones, they were so fishy. Oh oh, I particularly particularly particularly like the roast goose. It was fat and juicy and yummy. We scarfed it down. Fomfomfom too, who told me through a full mouth that she only lost the taste in the front part of her tongue. I would retort if only my mouth had spare capacity to speak.

I am happy when everyone is home.


Going in circles

May 28th 2009 7:00 am
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I read in the papers that the trains will start plying the new circle line today. I wanted to see the new circle line trains so I sat by the balcony and waited. That is because we can see train tracks from our balcony.

Cha walked by and asked me what I was doing, so I told her I was waiting for the circle line train. I don't know why she started scolding me and saying I wasn't smart, I thought that was so rude of her.

Doesn't everyone like trains?


Safe investment

May 27th 2009 8:26 am
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Ah ma and ah bee went to macau today. I told ah bee to place a bet for me, HKD$100 for black at the roulette table. I said if the ball lands on a red number, it is considered ah bee's bet. It is my bet only if the ball lands on a black number. In other words, heads I win, tails ah bee loses. Kind of like an american bank.

Ah bee later called and told me she had made a mistake and placed a $500 bet instead. Happily, I won that round so now I have $500 to put in my shoebox. Traditionally I also put a 150% tax on transactions so ah bee should give me $750 when she comes back.

I said, let's just round it up to $1000 coz it's only a few dollars difference and $750 is such an odd number we don't want to be dealing with coins and all that. So ah bee should have a crisp $1000 note for me upon her return.



I miss ah ma

May 26th 2009 7:34 am
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Ah ma and ah bee went out early in the morning with luggage and I knew they were disappearing for a few days again. Sulking won't change matters, so I went for my morning walk with cha happily.

My evening walk wasn't so happy coz it was only 40 minutes. That was because I was uncomfortable and had to keep scratching myself against benches and walls. Fomfomfom surmised there must be an ant or five in my fur biting me so we went home to clean up. But we found no ants. My vengeful heart had nowhere to venge, no ants to ground into powder.

I seethed with fomfomfom, who wanted to attack ah gong coz he was irking her so much. He was going on and on with his broker on the phone like he was conducting earthshaking business and fomfomfom wanted to poke his eyes out. The stakes must have been like 2 bucks.

The brighter side of things tell us we can learn the art of conversation from ah gong and his poor broker.

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