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I am not happy today.

January 4th 2008 9:34 am
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In the morning, Ah ma, Fomfomfom and Ah bee went out without me. I told them to wait for me but they didn’t. So I was stuck at home with Cha. Then in the afternoon, I told Fomfomfom that I wanted to go out coz it looked like it was going to rain. Ah ma refused to let us go coz she said it was too early. 2 minutes later, it started pouring. Luckily the rain stopped. But I only got to go out an hour later. At night, I was stuck with Ah bee till late. I am really sleepy and it is now way past my bedtime. I shall have to leave you my dear readers. I have a long day ahead tomorrow.

 

The real McCoy

January 3rd 2008 8:44 am
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I have dandruff on my backside and tail. Ah bee says I should use some anti-dandruff shampoo. Head&Shoulders, she says. But the dandruff ain’t on my head or my shoulders; they’re on my backside and tail. Someone needs to come up with Backside&Tail. There’s demand. I should go pitch this to P&G.

According to Fomfomfom, I’m her daughter because I’ve got her curly hair. And Ah bee’s button nose. And Cha’s mouth. And Ah ma’s gluttony. And I resemble Ah gong in the way I fart. Yes, we are one family alright.

They rushed down just now coz they thought that the pipe had burst. Turns out that it was because the hose wasn’t turned off properly. I was too tired so I just slept on the bed. That’s coz I went to the gardens and then welcomed passers-by at the garden for almost 2 hours. Huahua, the Chihuahua, walked by. This time the tables were turned. I am inside and he is trespassing. So I get to bark at him. He only gets to walk meekly by.

 

Zi you nu shen

January 2nd 2008 8:32 am
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I was attacked by the Statue of Liberty just now. And it’s a mighty ugly one at that. Fat, ugly and green. It’s even got hideous eyelashes. Complete with a giant M on its stummy. Anyway, it’s a gift from Wernie and it’s a dispenser. For chocolates. You work the contraption by pulling the arm ala a lever. Then the chocolates will drop. But I can’t eat chocolates so they were saying they could put my kibble in it. Or my tidbits. Or better yet, some of those crunchy green peas. Or some of the sio bak Ah ma made tonight. Ooooh. I love sio bak. I love sio bak more than I love pig’s stomach. That means I love sio bak a lot. A lot.

 

VSPP

January 1st 2008 8:33 am
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I told Ah ma that I want an increase in my allowance. She only laughed. I don’t think that’s a yes but it’s alright. I have one whole year to do it.

Yesterday Ah bee asked Fomfomfom what VSOP stands for. Very Superior Old something, Fomfomfom replied. Ah bee asked me if I knew what it stands for. I told her I only know what VSPP is- Very Superior Ping Ping. That’s me alright. Superior. All over.

 

2008

December 31st 2007 8:43 am
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Happy New Year everyone! I stayed up specially to do the countup so that at the stroke of midnight, I can make my New Year resolutions. Actually, I only have one this year- I want more pocket money. Ah bee says that it’s more like a wish, not a resolution. Cha says resolutions involve plans of the individual and then the execution of these plans. Well, I told her that my plan is to get more pocket money from Ah ma and I plan to execute my plan by keeping my hair long. When my hair is long, I am extra cute and Ah ma will not be able to reject me when I ask her for an increase in my allowance. There, my New Year resolution. *giggles*

 

Ji ji zha zha

December 30th 2007 7:58 am
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Ah bee and I were taking our little siesta in the living room when we heard noises in the garden. Turns out that there were 2 squirrels playing out there. So we went out and observed them. One was eating something off a tree. He was making a lot of noise tearing whatever he was eating apart and throwing whatever he didn’t fancy down the tree. I watched him for a while. The other one I never saw coz according to Ah bee, he wasn’t moving at all. I think he saw us and decided that his best bet was to keep as still as he could. Smart squiggy.

I didn’t have to take a bath today. Which is just as well since the MJ gals will be smelly without their perfume anyway. We can all stink together.

And it appears that Mocha’s family isn’t that ready to give her up for adoption afterall. Sigh. But thanks a lot for your help, Weizhi jiejie. Remember our date on the 5th!

 

"They are always babies to us."

December 29th 2007 9:00 am
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Today I met a new friend at the gardens. Her name is Freckles and she is a 5 month old Cocker Spaniel. She is also very friendly and very frisky. Too frisky. She came charging at me almost the whole length of my walk. And so I didn’t walk much. I think I walked like 5 minutes in all. The rest of the time Ah bee was carrying me. Coz Freckles kinda scares me. Anyway, Freckles is such a baby. She just darts from one tree to another, harasses every passerby she meets and runs away from her owners. If my Ah ma sees her, she would smack her backside. So naughty.

We also met this nice lady who asked Fomfomfom, “How old is your baby?” Fomfomfom said that I am four, hardly a baby. The woman said that we are always babies to our family and that her baby was 16. If only Mocha’s family thought this way. Mocha is a 2 year old female Shih Tzu and her family doesn’t love her coz she wasn’t wanted and isn’t very healthy. I hope there is someone out there who will give Mocha a home. Please leave me a note if you would like to adopt Mocha.

Because every dog should have a home.

 

New vet in town

December 28th 2007 9:08 am
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We went looking for the younger vet woman today. Instead, this new vet man came out and told us that she has moved to the other branch. I will miss her. She is always so enthusiastic and exuberant. And she has small fingers. That’s very important.

Anyway the new vet man is all theory, according to Fomfomfom. And he charged us for consultation too. Hello, I am like the VIP there. Obviously new. But at least he was gentle. That’s very important too.

I slept most of the night away and I didn’t want to play with Ah bee. Cha thinks that I might have gotten a heat stroke from the walk in the afternoon.

Wo shen bin.

 

Ding dong.......

December 27th 2007 9:56 am
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The weather today was lovely and no one got baked. I am happy to report that the filthy thing is gone. No more. Just like Bhutto. The woman, in the words of her party’s spokesperson, has expired. We were so shocked and we watched the news for a long long time. It’s not like we’re sympathetic. Maybe we are, but that woman is supposedly corrupted too. So again, maybe not. But it’s just shocking, if you know what I mean. Politics is so so so dirty. And did she know that this morning was the last time she would wake from her bed? Who would have thunk? And the markets immediately went down and oil prices went up. It is all rather scary if you ask me. But Ah ma told me not to worry coz nothing in my little doggie world has changed. I felt so much better after Ah ma said that. I will sleep soundly tonight.

 

Rated PG (violence)

December 26th 2007 8:54 am
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Fomfomfom boxed me coz today is Boxing Day. I know what you are thinking. Don’t say it.

Today is the 5th time they made a lousy call on the weather. 2 more and it’d be a grand slam. I don’t really mind walking when it’s hot (okay not THAT much) but I worry about that Fomfomfom. She is always ill. A rather weak woman. But don’t think she’s an oil-saving lamp. She accompanied Ah ma to the doctor’s and when she came back, she declared that she wanted to “tear the mouth of the idiot doctor” right after she rips “that ugly face attached to that fat body”. Just don’t cross her.

Also we saw something filthy at the gardens today. If I told you what it is, this entry would no longer be PG. So I shan't.

Tomorrow. Tomorrow we go back to a G rating.

 
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