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Adventures of a lead dog

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How many time do I have to tell him-its Spiderdog III ?

May 8th 2007 7:44 am
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I should be the center of attention at my house, but all my yappy human brother wants to talk about is Spiderdog. He even messes up the title and calls it Spiderman. I get tired of hearing about movies-particularly when there aren't enough of them about dogs. I've got to go do some more research on dog movies. I'll howl at the dairy later.
Demon Flash Bandit (dog movie critic)

 

Spiderdog III

May 7th 2007 11:01 am
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Mommy and my brother went to a movie yesterday. They saw Spiderdog III. I think they offically called it Spiderman, but I'm sure they just didn't read the marquee correctly because it had to be Spiderdog. How could he be a superhero if he wasn't a dog? Anyway, they liked it. Both my brothers had already seen it when it came on at midnight for its first showing-Mommy stayed home with methat time. Mommy brought me bread from the Greek restaurant. I love their bread. Mommy discovered this when she brought home a piece and I happened to find it and eat it. It was good. Now I get any left over bread she brings from there. When the new Underdog movie comes out, I'd better be allowed to go to the theatre to see it. It is a movie about dogs, made for dogs, and made by dogs (although my smart alec brother will probably try to claim some humanproducer and director made it-like I believe that. I've got to check on the internet to see which dog starred in Spiderdog so I can tell my brother he is wrong and the dog is right-as usual. I'll howl at the dairy later.
Demon Flash Bandit (movie critic)

 

Why do we get left behind?

May 6th 2007 9:24 am
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Hi,
I had a good day yesterday. I went to the post office with Mommy because she had to mail a package. I had an important job to do. I had to stay and guard the car so no one could take it. Had I not had a job to do, I wouldn't have let Mommy out of the car without me. Then I got another ride when Mommy went to Taco Bell to get dinner for everyone. Then Mommy went by Burger King for my dinner. I love their hamburgers. I usually won't eat burgers from any of the other fast food places. The day was going great until Mommy went to a party WITHOUT THE DOG. I like parties. Why can't I ever go? I've got to stop now and go give Mommy my sad dejected look so she feels guilty for leaving me.
Demon Flash Bandit (potential party dog)

 

New puppy

May 5th 2007 9:55 am
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I am so excited. Mommy says we are getting a new puppy next week. This is my best dairy entry ever. I will be so glad to have another dog to play with. Mommy is supposed to go out tonight, but I think my brother will be home. If not, my other brother will come over. I've got to go check on my family. What would they do without me?
Demon Flash Bandit

 

I think my diary is more important than cleaning

May 4th 2007 6:47 pm
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I didn't put an entry in my diary yesteray. Mommy types it for me, and she was busy. If you ask me, nothing she did was as important as my dairy, but you dogs know how humans are. They get busy with the silliest things. As long as I get to go for a ride every day, I'm happy. There isn't a lot going on around here. Mommy has been doing something stupid around the house called cleaning. If you ask my opinion, it is a total waste of time because I think everything looks great the way it is. Spring has some strange effect on humans. I hope she doesn't throw away my toys because I see a lot of garbage bags around here,but it better be only her stuff.
Demon Flash Bandit (toy lover)

 

Toy says I love you

May 2nd 2007 12:50 pm
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Hi,
Yesterday was a normal day. I had to babysit my brother while Mommy and my other brother went out to eat and to a movie. I really want to go too. I wish this horrible discrimination against dogs would end. Mommy got me a couple of new dog toys. I am so frustrated with the plush one. It says "I love you". How am I going to rip up a toy that loves me? I did sleep next to it last night. What can I say? The toy loves me. I hope all you dogs out there get lots of love.
Demon Flash Bandit (Loved dog-even by toys)

 

Some things need "watering"

May 1st 2007 8:03 am
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Yesterday was nice. Mommy and my brother stayed home and I didn't have to babysit for my other brother. Mommy tried to take me for a walk, but we only made it to the mailbox. Mommy's back started hurting so she had to return to the house. I have a problem with humans and walking. The walks are for my benefit so we should walk where I want to walk. She wanted to walk to the lake. I wanted to "water" everything I saw. I watered the bag of stuff that melts my snow. The I watered the tire of the van, and then the pick-up truck's tire, and then I had to water the big tree . Mommy had no intention of going out of the way to those places that needed watering, but I'm strong enough to pull her there. She refuses to let go of the leash. I think it would be great to roam free. She could film it and it could be a movie. They made "Benji: Off the Leash". I'd like to see "Demon Flash Bandit: Off the leash. I hope all my dogster friends are having fun. I'd better go and water some more stuff.

 

I love pillows

April 30th 2007 8:49 am
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Yesterday was kind of quiet. I had to babysit for my brother because Mommy went to see a movie. Mommy said Hot Fuzz had a dog in it. He didn't have a main role-they probably couldn't afford to pay him for a bigger role. I'm sure dogs cost a lot more to get than humans. Anyway, I jumped in bed and laid on Mommy's pillows. The pillows are far more comfortable than the mattress. I like to lay on softness. I also found a box of fruit roll-ups which I've been sleeping with-just in case I get hungry.
Demon Flash Bandit-Pillow inspector

 

Phantom Dog

April 29th 2007 9:49 am
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Yesterday was lousy. Before I go further with this entry, I'll explain-I don't poop. Other dogs poop, but I don't. The poop that is in our yard is from the phantom dog. He likes to come here to poop, but no one see him. He is like the wind-you can never see him. When I was a puppy, he pooped in the bedroom and I covered it with newspaper because I was trying to protect a fellow dog. He can't help it if he has to poop-most dogs aren't like me. Now that you understand the situation, I accientally stepped in the phantom dog's poop, and got some got on my back paw. Naturally I had to clean it or, if Mommy sees it, she might want to give me a bath. I'm not a big fan of baths. I did what any dog would do, I cleaned it with cloth. The fact that the cloth just happened to be Mommy's bedspread seemed to upset Mommy. I have no idea why. She would want my paw to be clean-and it was when I got finished. I was planning to lay on the bed so it was very logical that I would clean my paw before laying down. Mommy must like the phantom dog because she didn't fuss at me. She said the bedspread is washable. I'm glad Mommy is understanding because, if she wasn't the phantom dog could be in trouble and might even be banned from our property. The best part is I didn't have to get a bath. I did a good job of cleaning my paw. Besides, Mommy said she didn't feel like fighting with me in the bathtub. She used a wet wipe to finish cleaning my paw-I don't really like my paw cleaned with wet wipes, but at least it is better than a bath.
Demon Flash Bandit---Protector of the Phantom Dog

 

I am a male dog.

April 28th 2007 6:02 am
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Mommy usually brings me toys or treats whenever she goes out without me, and that usually makes me extremely happy. However, I couldn't believe what she brought me yesterday-PINK yes PINK tennis balls (3 of them in a container). Normally I love tennis balls or any other kind for that matter, but these were PINK. I am not a girl dog. I refused to play with them because I am a male dog. If I were a girl dog, pink would be fine, but I'm a boy. What was Mommy thinking? I heard her tell my brother that she read dogs are color blind. How do humans know this? If I can't distinquish color, why would I refuse to play with them because of the color pink? Mommy thinks they look nicer than regular tennis balls. Of course, Mommy isn't a male so naturally, being a female, she would think pink is a nice color. Why can't my brother get them instead of Mommy? He wouldn't pick pink. He would buy green or blue. I love Mommy, but sometimes I do wonder about her taste. I mentioned in my earlier dairy that when I colored the drab (my opinion) green carpet orange with craft paint, she just said she would replace it with hardwood. I knew her taste was bad then because the orange really did wonders for pulling the whole decor of the room together. I felt it needed a bit of color. It would have a lot more color if I could reach the other color craft paints, but I could only manage to get the orange one. Ever since I got into the craft paint as a puppy and walked around with an red nose for about a week, she keeps the paint out of my reach (or tries to), but I am a very talented dog at getting into things (that's what she calls it). I would prefer she say I am an over achiever, but for some odd reason, she doesn't seem to think it is a good thing. I wonder if I'll ever understand humans. They are so ODD.
Demon Flash Bandit (Macho Dog)

 
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